For the second time in less than two years, I’ve been relegated to rental car Hell. My normal ride is busy recovering from a second rear-end encounter initiated by a young driver in iffy conditions. Previously on “This Is Not Your Beautiful Car,” I sampled one of the last of the great V8 Interceptors– I mean, the Pontiac Bonneville. It was so large– on the outside– that I was constantly checking the rear-view mirror for Tomcats auguring-in for a landing. On the inside, it was plush and chock-full of gadgets. But it was also more cramped than an Olympic swimmer after a seven course meal. This time ‘round I got sentenced to an 05’ Taurus.
While the Ford is definitely roomier inside than the plastic Pontiac, the Taurus lacks what anyone would call “style.” In fact, to complete the generic motif, it really needs the word “CAR” in black block lettering adorning its hood, roof and doors. Driving-wise, the Ford Taurus is about as close to a Porsche Boxster as a block of cement. The Taurus’ interior is cheap-looking, if hard-wearing (which may or may not be a good thing). But hey, this baby’s got a stereo, cruise-control, power windows and map lights. So, unlike Christina Aguilera, it’s not a complete stripper. And it’s got me thinking: the Taurus would make a great “first car.”
When I was growing up, “kids’ cars” were usually pre-abused sedans from the late ‘60s’ or anytime in the ‘70s’. These battle-weary Yank tanks or plus-sized rice burners were considered a pro-active solution to teenage driving. The reasoning was simple: put as much iron as possible between junior or little missy and whatever solid objects they might strike in some late-braking encounter. While these sofas-on-wheels were less nimble than k-fed after his tenth Long Slow Comfortable Screw Against the Wall, they’d shake off a lot of minor scrapes– especially if they were from the duck-billed 5mph bumper era. They were also dirt cheap to fix.
Of course, there were a few kids whose parents bought them something sexy and brand-new– and a replacement after they’d bent it. And others were forced by financial circumstances to share the family car. The practice was understandable but deeply unnatural; it implied that your money was going toward other things, like college.
Kids who received ratty wheels did what they could to be cool. They tinted the windows and blared the soundtrack from “Shaft” or other proto-hip-hop tunes. Thankfully, there wasn’t much anyone could do about these beaters’ underwhelming performance, save slapping on some serious rubber, and no one thought about tires until they were as bald as Kojak. Any performance-oriented body mod got the derision it deserved.
While it’s an ancient bit of iron (practically unchanged for 10 years), the Taurus is a decent car for post-permit progeny. ASs it's only slightly faster than a power walker, Ye Olde Understeer would never get a rookie driver in trouble. While the Taurus' handling isn’t particularly sharp (as in a butter knife), the car pretty much goes where you aim it. There’s just about enough acceleration to merge into traffic. It’s wide and low enough that rollovers are less likely than a rigged lottery draw. And if something did happen, the Taurus four-star crash protection would see you right.
On the economy front, Taurus mileage is a precocious twenty-something. The jelly mold Ford has never been known for reliability, but parts are cheap. Your kids should be able to keep one in gas, brakes, etc. on burger-flipping money. Forget about depreciation; chances are the Taurus will die in service. You can get a decent 50-60k unit with a few useful toys for less than five figures. Perfectly drivable examples of this rental mainstay cost as little as $3k to $4k. Prozac excepted, peace of mind doesn’t come any cheaper.
The main demerit: the Taurus’ commodious back seat. While I’m not concerned about prurient issues (lust will find a way), the Taurus can haul up to six people. It’s been scientifically proven that a teenager’s stupidity increases in direct proportion to the number of peers in close physical proximity. The sheer inattention and bravado of six teens with one brain between them is too staggering to contemplate. (Some states ban new drivers from carrying cohorts.) At least they won’t be drag-racing; the engine has nowhere near the power to haul 900 pounds of hormones at a non-humiliating speed.
Ending on a positive note, the Taurus is dull and ugly. Ford’s sedan teaches your child that if they don’t study hard and get into a good school, they can look forward to driving this sort of car for the rest of their life. Nothing focuses the mind like the prospect of a life full of rental hacks.
My kids are going to get whatever’s in the garage at the time, 11 years from now. What they’ll get, I have no idea, probably a car we’ll purchase in the next few years.
Following that rule, lots of kids will get big, powerful, top-heavy SUV’s like tippy 2nd-gen Explorers. I remember reading about a woman who couldn’t understand why her daughter was killed when the SUV that 16yo daughter borrowed went off a curve in the road in good visiblity and dry road conditions. A client of mine mentioned he put his 16yo son in a Trailblazer, and I had to bite my tongue on that one.
My nominee for a new set of training wheels would be a Scion xB: cheap, gutless engine, ESC standard. Just missing side curtain airbags, unfortunately.
That was really funny! Thanks, i really liked it.
The Taurus isn’t that far away from my own first car, an Intrepid that was barely above rental spec (I had the optional 3.5, and ABS, and that was it). Short of the tinfoil transmission, it was a rather decent first car. Safe, easy to drive (just a whole lotta understeer), and big. I know having passengers is supposed to be unsafe, but at the same time, being able to cart around all your friends is basically the only incentive for driving something on the left side of the cool wall. Oh, and at least it sounded kinda fast (I loved that engine, even if it was kneecaped by the afformentioned transmission).
One of my friends, on the other hand, started off in a Fiero. I’m sure the Iron Duke is all that kept him from killing himself.
Judging by the thickness of the doors + the distance between the driver and the outside world, I vote for the Grand Marquis / Crown Vic , one more plus, driving one of these will make many motorists in a safe distance, specially if it’s black and coming behind you…………
I drove an 05 Taurus for two weeks while my Si was in the shop. I have never been more ready to get rid of a car that wasn’t mine.
Well, my first car was a ’78 Fiesta (with optional working vent windows). Somehow, I managed to survive. And that car inspired me to always like smaller, lighter, better handling cars… fast forward a couple of decades, and the SVT Focus beckoned from the used car lot as a grown-up Fiesta with luxurious appointment (heated seats, anyone?). A bargain purchase it was, but… still a bit more car than I trust my 16 year old genius with.
Now, that Sable LS Premium sure looked like a good idea, so much so I bought it for over 80% less than it cost new. It’s a stately barge with a lumbering, sure-footed persona, the quintessential pimped-up commuter.
My sons first reaction, eyes sparkling with excitement?
“Dad, you’re going to drive that and let me use the SVT?”
Sorry, son. You’ve got to buy your own toys now….
Yup. Rental cars suck.
I drove a Taurus recently and was pretty convinced that Ford should continue making them in the interest of national security.
If the pentagon cranks out a few hundred thousand of them and then threatens to ship them over to Iran and N. Korea, the nuclear crises will easily be averted.
BTW title of the article should’ve been: The Truth Hertz.
Living in the Netherlands, teens that get a car from their parents are a rare species. Cars and the costs of running cars are so expensive that only the wealthiest of people can afford to buy their children new cars, and even they don’t always make use of that possibility. Most teens just get funds to get their driving license (manual gearbox, obviously) from their parents when they reach 18. It costs about 1500-2000 Euros and usually takes till you’re close to 19 so the chances of getting a car in your teens from your parents is quite small.
Of course, because the distances you need to travel here are far shorter and their is much less space around for everybody so that isn’t necessarily a bad thing for the environment and personal safety. Still, on a personal level, being 21 and in my final year of college, a car is still not objectively defendable (free public transportation :(, sheer communism). I think it ain’t cool.
Btw, I think this teens are bad drivers stuff is a bit exaggerated. Of course teens cause more accidents then experienced drivers, live and learn. How do racing drivers get good at what they do. They go over the limit to find the limit. I think it’s hard to find someone (specially petrol heads) that never tried how fast their car really goes. Only thing we can do is make cars as safe as possible, or have compulsory circuit training.
“Ending on a positive note, the Taurus is dull and ugly.”
A brilliant statement, truly laughed out loud.
There came a time a few weeks back where I ended up getting a 1987 Taurus with 44,000 miles for $300 and a 2004 Taurus for $4500.
The only real differences between the two were that the seats, the radio, and the overall quality of materials were better in the 2004 model. Otherwise, it was simply incredible how similar the two Tauruses were on the open road.
The said thing about the Taurus is that the 1992-1996 V6 Camry was a much better car across the board. Faster, lighter, better quality components, and much better connectedness with the open road.
I would rather get my kid a Camry or an Accord from that era than a late model Taurus. I’d like my kids to be able to maintain their own vehicles and learn how to be responsible for them, and that’s hard to do if the kid doesn’t like their ride in the first place.
Great story. I actually met a guy at college who lives this article.
He purchased a relative’s Taurus (company car) for $5000, cleaned it up, put 17″ Cobra R wheels on it, lowering springs, ported the intake, opened up the exhaust and added high lift rocker arms and a sweet stereo. All in his spare time as a student.
The car drove real nice and has an aggressive stance. I was impressed at his ability to make lemonade out of…well…see for yourself:
PIC1
PIC2
PIC3
LINK
5mph fenders??? Wish my first car had fenders that strong. I remember it having 5mph bumpers ….
As for the Taurus being a basic boring, ugly appliance, I actually think it has more style than the current Accord (aka Ronco toaster oven), which by almost any standard (except units sold) is hideous. Then again Honda can put a dog turd on wheels and the blind fanatics will call it brilliant. I agree the Taurus is a great first car, or a second car if you just need a reliable second set of wheels to offset the lack of reliability of your european car. This article is timely because I was just thinking about buying another car for the folks to drive when they come out (they need an automatic and my truck is too big). For $4k this might just do the trick. Beats $25k on a new Camry. Thanks.
No style?? If you look ONLY at the grille, (hold your hands arms-length in front of you an look through a small hole between them, block off the ugly parts… ie EVERYTHING else) it evokes the timeless masterpiece of styling that was the Jaguar E-type!
Of course junior has no clue what an XKE is, so nevermind.
Moray McCallum will rot in hell for eternally sullying that classic shape by plastering it upon a blandmobile from Ford.
–chuck
Hey, my college car was a 1990 taurus LX station wagon, and I couldn’t recommend it more highly. With working class parents and valet parking as my main source of income, the ad for a $700 car that “ran great” was my ticket to freedom.
I picked up the Taurus the morning I was to drive 400 miles to campus for my sophomore year. It was limo tinted all the way around, had bumpers that had seemed more into grinding, a smoke scented interior, and the A/C didn’t work, but true to the ad, it started the first time and I was soon on my way.
The Taurus and I grew inseparable over the next few years. With its eight (8!) passenger seating, sofa-like seats, and an interior seemingly immune to mud, soda, and even lit cigarette butts, there was no finer way for you and 7 of you closest associates to frequent the nearest taco hell or arrive at swanky promenade/houseparty (so long as you parked around the back).
A fluid leak led to no power steering around the second week of classes but with a $200 repair estimate, I settled for refilling the reservoir with Walmart steering fluid and living with slippery puddles on my driveway. Of course, the steering soon went out for good and by January, anything more than a quarter-turn of the wheel required a passenger’s assistance.
Despite this and other minor quibbles, the Taurus served me well. Though it had an engine that could make a Mack diesel feel like an inline 6, I was free to push the Taurus as hard as I wanted without fear of alarming the police (though the fear of having to literally push remained). The Taurus saw me through multiple winter storms (some where I had sleep in the back – a surprisingly comfortable proposition), a violent sounding rear end that barely nicked the bumper, dozens of road trips, and my first dates with my future wife.
The Taurus continued to give after college, especially on moving days with its cavernous cargo room. However, I had to leave it at my parents house after I found an job in Manhattan and it soon fell into neglect. Though I eventually fixed the steering and tried to give it away to my younger cousins or friends who needed a car, no one wanted to get near a station wagon with a crappy radio when there were used RAV4s and the like to be found. Finally, my parents got tried of it clogging up their driveway and donated it to charity.
I still miss that car. To this day there are few vehicles that combine value, durability and utility as well as the Taurus. It’s too bad Ford decided to take a different direction with this tried and true formula that made the Taurus the best selling car in America.
taurus, accord, camry, passat – basically any 6 cylinder, front wheel drive 4 door family sedan is a great car for a first driver.
Top heavy, overweight, slow braking, tippy, death traps such as SUVs should be avoided.
When I turned 16 and got my license, I was forbidden from driving my Dad’s E28 535i, and relegated to borrowing our ’75 Land Rover. My parents’ thinking was that in a vehicle that handled like a tractor and didn’t so much accelerate as accumulate speed (in the same way a chest-of-drawers accumulates dust) I would be incapable of doing something stupid and injuring myself permanently.
I spun it, and also once broke a half-axle, and to this day I have a penchant for donning a tweed trilby.
The 3rd gen (1996-1999) was the most interesting Taurus by far, same poor driving dynamics, but at least it looked interesting, the 98-99s had a much nicer looking front clip. too, without the “gills” on the 96-97s
I have a white 98 as my daily. It “handles”, if you want to call it that, like a Cement truck
People complained so much about the Taurus being Interesting looking that Ford made it terrifically boring again in 2000. People always get wide-eyed when I Point out to them that the styling of the late 3G is reminiscent of the Jaguar E Type.
Most people are, in fact, boring and simple, and so they want Boring and Simple cars, Can you tell I have a bit of a misanthropic streak? *snarl*
You can make a Vulcan-Engined 3G Taurus sound at least like a badass by tearing off the Intake Silencer, AKA “Saxacone’s Mousetrap”
These Instructions are for the V8 SHO model (something else that makes the 3G the most interesting) but they apply to all 3Gs
http://v8sho.com/SHO/mousetrap.html
Better throttle response (the engine doesn’t have to suck air in through the half a mile of plastic pipe) and much, much louder intake are the result. I did this to mine and people constantly ask me “How’d you make a Taurus sound like that?”
I guess this is the modern day equivalent of flipping the breather upside down :)
I have Terminator-Looking LED Taillights on mine, too. they work well with the big plastic thing on the back of the car.
Photos of my Hoopty:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/ppc/118118044/
^ Even has a “Motif Bar” :)
http://www.flickr.com/photos/ppc/118118138/
^ I Like the Oval rear window!
http://www.flickr.com/photos/ppc/118118273/
^Unflattering “Flower Power” Wheel covers. yeck.
My first car was a 1987 Nissan Sentra XE. 2 door hatchback, about 80 horsepower when it was new. Too bad I got it when it had 120k.
No air bags, no traction control, no safety features to mention. That car taught me to drive well because if I didn’t, well, I’d be dead.
The only good part was it weighed so little it handled surprisingly well. You could throw it into hard turns at 25mph+ and scare the piss out of anybody in the passenger seat.
ah, good times.
In 1996, my wife and I rented a Taurus while visiting my daughter, who was away at school in Florida. On the last day we spent a little too much time at our parting lunch and it became evident that we stood a very good chance of missing the last flight back home. The airport was 85 miles away and we had just over an hour until our flight, but there is a “back road”, not heavily patrolled, that was worth a try. Without saying anything to my wife, I gradually accelerated to about 100 mph and held it there until we were passed by a Mustang Cobra. What the heck, I thought, let’s see if we can stay with him. We did. He was holding a steady 115 and we remained easily on his tail for the next 50 miles. The car was so smooth, my wife didn’t even ask how fast we were going until I tried to pass the Mustang at probably 120. We made our flight that day with a few minutes to spare. The Taurus is, in my opinion, a very good car that unfortunately got hit with the ugly stick in model year 1996.
I had a Taurus rental last year. It would be be much more effective than abstinance only education for preventing teen pregnancy and STDs… Effing horrible.
The Taurus is sort of like candy corn. Every year at someone’s Halloween party, I dip into the candy corn and have to spit the vile stuff out. I forget how much it sucks. Similarly, I’ll see a Taurus in nice shape for sale and think “It’s no 5-series, but it’s a clean design and even loaded ones are cheap.” Then you get behind the wheel and have to spit the Taurus out, too.
I recently had a clerk at one of the Mopar rental agencies tell me “Well, you booked a full size car. You should spend $10 more a day and get the premium.” Why? I asked, assuming it was just the usual retail sales bs. “Well, premium will put you in a Dodge Magnum. Otherwise you’ll have to take a Taurus.”
There’s one number that could dissuade some parents from a 96-on Taurus:
137.
That’s the top speed of a jellybean Taurus with the four-cam motor.
I’m not far removed from my own first car (88 CRX), and I have a much, much different view of what makes a good first car than most other people.
I think your first car should be one that teaches you how to drive well, and how to save money by making your own repairs. It should be economical to operate, so taking a 300-mile Saturday trip along the back roads for fun and improvement isn’t cost-prohibitive. It should teach you how to control both oversteer and understeer, while being forgiving enough to not just spit you into the woods the first time you approach the limit. If it doesn’t have any driver aids, so much the better; learning how to modulate brakes at the limit in a parking lot is a lot safer than trying to figure it out on the road in a panic situation when the “ABS” light comes on during a hard stop. It shouldn’t have much room for friends, and shouldn’t have any distractions that would take your mind off the road.
The existence of the rough-paintjob-but-solid-mechanically $2500 Miata should disqualify just about anything else.
powerpeecee: Unlike you, I do not see most people as boring and simple; I find people fascinating in their complexity and diversity. However, I think even some of the most exciting and interesting people do not rely on cars for their entertainment, they just want something safe and reliable to drive. They get their satisfaction in life from other things, like taking on challenges at work and raising fine young men and women, traveling, hiking, the arts, and so on.
For my first car when I was 16 my dad managed to find me an ultra clean 1968 Belvidere. It was actually owned by a little old lady and was still in top shape in 1984. It had a bit of rust around the wheel wells but was relatively solid. It had a slant 6 and a big backseat. I eventually sold it and bought a 74 Beetle (something every kid should own, just for the memories alone).
Fast forward to 1993, I’m driving a beater 84 T-Bird. This thing had no grill, hubcaps or seatbelts. You had to slam your shoulder into the drivers door to get it to open. I was getting ready to leave my hometown and no way I trusted this beast to get me to Detroit safely. I put a classified in the local paper to dump it and a gentleman calls about it. He says that he is interested in the car for his daughter. I said “sir, I honestly don’t recommend this car for anybodys daughter.” He thanked me for my honesty and I sold it to a wholesaler a few hours later.
*refrains from getting into a flame war with HawaiiJim*
hope TTAC doesn’t mind the technical stuff…
All of this Taurus hate and not one mention of the utterly terrible (even when it was new, in 1986) AXOD(-E) / AX4S / AX4N Transmission?
Grenading sun gears, Stupid lube tube design that causes the entire thing to melt down, *aluminum* forward clutch pistons that crack and render you motionless, inadequate cooling, and clips that hold the pins into the final drive breaking and allowing the pin to fly out why the trans is spinning and break the case in half.
I really hope somebody (or a whole lot of somebodies) got fired for the design of this thing.
See
http://www.taurusclub.com/encyclopedia/Engine/Trans.html
and
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ford_AXOD_transmission
20 years from now, when most examples of Ford’s Taurus have gone to salvage yards, to be rendered down into something else, maybe the few remaining 1990s Taurus SHO sedans (with the all-aluminum DOHC Yamaha V6, that survives, albeit in a better state of tune, in the Volvo XC-90V8) will become collectible. As for rental cars, if a person can find any of them, which haven’t been beat to shit, given how most people view rental cars, it’s probably as close to a miracle as you’d get. Given that, it’s hard to evaluate any model, given what you’d find in a rental car lot; unless it was close to just being broken in (think less than a 1,000 miles).
Just my opinion, but Mr. Dederer is trying way too hard to be clever with this one.
All of this Taurus hate and not one mention of the utterly terrible (even when it was new, in 1986) AXOD(-E) / AX4S / AX4N Transmission?
More cost cutting at its finest. Ford finally made the necessary internal upgrades in 2002.
Don’t forget the 3.8L V6s known to eat headgaskets after a few years of cooling system neglect. That’s a spicy meat-baaall!
^ the double whammy of the 3.8 and the AXOD no doubt turned people off from Ford cars forever.
The 3.8 was too much engine for the AXOD, The scenario was that the 3.8 would chew up the AXOD and then commit seppuku in some sort of underhood muder-suicide pact.
or something. :D
At least the Taurus is better than the last champion of Rental Car Hell, the Ford Tempo.
Frankly, anything rental car companies use (read: popularly optioned base domestic sedan last updated about five years ago) works as a teenager’s first car, i.e., cheap, semi-reliable and boring.
I had a 92 Taurus with the 3.8 and the auto tranny – I got rid of it at 98,000 miles due to needing CV joints and engine mounts, and knowing the record of the tranny and engine. I loved the car other than that – smooth ride, nice old school velour interior, etc.
So what did I get – a Dodge Intrepid R/T – drove great, but the biggest piece of crap ever.
A great first car would be an old Crown Vic or Grand Marquis – safe, durable, and cheap to maintain and repair.
Andrew,
If your criteria for a teen’s first car are: big, safe, fuel-efficient, cheap to fix, not enough power to get into trouble, and definitely not “cool,” an even better choice is a used 4 cyl Toyota Camry.
It is so slow that even a Taurus will suck the headlights out of it, and your kid’s friends riding in the back seat will feel like they’re in their parent’s car; maybe they’ll be less apt to do something stupid.
Ah, but Ford thought so highly of the AX4S tranny that they put it in the Lincoln and Windstar.
I don’t think the 3.8L was too much for the AX4S. Any motor is too much for the wretched thing. No, the double whammy that was spoken of was the early 3.8L’s habit of blowing head gaskets between 50-100k miles. It wasn’t until 1998 that Ford finally fixed the issue.
Fun essay. Brought me to think about my teens, when I learned to drive in my parents’ 1972 Mercury Montego MX Brougham sedan . . . powered by a mighty six!
Fast forward to my current job in government, where the motor pool is largely filled with recent-year Tauri. God, I hate taking trips in those cars. Even the old Montego had more “personality.”
I suppose I’d give a teenager a Taurus if I had one sitting in the driveway collecting moss, but I’d be embarrassed about doing so. I’d rather put them in a good economy car like a Civic. The trouble with boats like the Taurus is that one is so insulated from the world that a certain complacency can set in when driving.
My training wheel vehicle was an old Dodge Polara station wagon. Crap brown-and-rust colored, am-only radio, no AC and skin-scalding black vinyl seats. The only way to drive in the summertime was to roll the front windows and the back window down and keep a speed of at least 40 MPH so that the wind would blow straight through the car.
It had no acceleration and got awful gas mileage. I had to check the gas level with a makeshift yardstick/dipstic that I kept in the back. If I recall, 2-inches was the equivalent of “E”.
It was a hate-love-hate-and-hate-some-more relationship.
But that car got me to and from my summer jobs and safely to school (4 or 5 hours away) once, although I didn’t keep it at school. I decided that if I really needed to go someplace, I’d rather walk or bum rides than worry about that beater breaking down and stranding me in some snowstorm.
My dad kept the car for two or three years…long enough for me to learn how to do tuneups, change the oil and filter, lube the fittings, change points, teardown and rebuild the alternator, change the air filters, change a flat, replace burnt out turn signals and headlights, and do a brake job.
All that long after I figured out that the car wasn’t worth waxing.
It was crappy, but it was free, and I didn’t have any money except what I made in my summer jobs. I did use that car to take one girl on a date. Bless her heart, she didn’t mind the car at all!
I think my dad got rid of the Polara when it finally broke down and needed a new camshaft or freeze plugs or something. It happened while I was at school and therefore not driving or fixing it. One day in 1985 I came home from school, and it was gone. That was when I started driving the ’69 Chevy Impala that my dad had bought new…now, another 15+ year old rustbucket, but a solid car that would get me through my first year or so of driving to my first post-college job.
The one time I drove my mother’s car, a Pontiac Bonneville, I got into an accident, badly damaging the front clip. Even though we fixed it ourselves, I don’t think that car was ever the same afterward. So yeah, the beaters were good training wheels for me.
I rented one of these when I had family visiting. I left my car with Mom, and drove the rental to work. When freeway traffic came to an abrupt halt, I actually heard skidding from the rear wheels. Apparently rear discs were not on the Taurus option list, and the ABS option was too dear for rental agencies.
My ’00 Jetta is by no means a driver’s car (regardless of what VW’s ad campaign said), but you can definitely have one for under 5 figures. Moreover, side airbags and ABS (with 4-wheel discs, thank you) were standard equipment. If you’re worried about Junior going too fast, just look for a model with the base 2 liter 4-cylinder. As an extra bonus, the backseat discourages more than 2 passengers, and extra-curricular activity back there wouldn’t be so comfortable either.
I bought my son a 1984 AMC Concord for his first car, the car was 14 years old when he was 16. It had the basic inline six that Jeep also used until very recently (unbreakable – better than the much lauded slant six Chrysler engine), the unbreakable Chrysler rear wheel drive Torqueflite automatic, dead-simple 1970’s tech live rear axle with leaf springs and not much else. The idea was – it should be so simple, even HE could find a buddy to fix it (I knew there was no way he’d fix it – the boy missed out on the gear-head gene somehow).
Well, he broke it anyway. Being utterly dumb, he shoved 5 corn-fed friends into it (none of whom were as thin as he/that had to look like 6 ounces in a 3 ounce jug) and overloaded the car until the one leaf spring broke. Fixed that. But car #1 (Concord) was a “gift” from mom & dad.
Next, car #2, we only “helped” him buy. (Moving towards independence and maturity). It was a Mercury Marquis. Get the formula, here?
For son #2, 5 years younger, his first car was a huge mistake. A 1990 Pontiac Grand Prix. Absolute crap. He put 3X the purchase price into repairs in the first 6 months. Sold it, we “helped him” get car #2, a 1992 Toyota Corolla Alltrak. The thing is STILL going. Quarter of a million miles, it only now needs a right front driveshaft (we bought it and are having it put in for him for his Christmas gift).
Oh yeah, this Toyota took son #2 and son #1 from northern Michigan all the way to California AND back on part of old Rt 66, reliably, last spring, in order to: a) do a road-tour and b) spend a week on Habitat for Humanity house building in California. Toyota’s rule.
Good article!
I’ve rented a LOT of Tauruses and Sables and while not exactly exciting, they do get the job done. Stopped renting them maybe 4 or 5 years ago when they seemed to have really turned into the cheap seats.
But I did consider one when seeking a car for my eldest daughter, for just the reasons cited in this piece. Got something else, but a Taurus would have been OK. One attribute they have is that they are good snow cars, an important factor here in northern New England.
I haven’t read much of the commentting above so, if I cover something already above: my apologies.
The Taurus is the poster child for 21st Century American Auto Manufacturing. Not simply for representing what is wrong today, but of all the good and bad things that got us to where we are today.
I have been the owner of 3 of ’em. All the second generation (92 to 96?), one of them being a 93 SHO. That car was probably my most favorite car of all I’ve owned. But more to the matter:
In 1993 this car was current interpretation of basic American iron. There were cars available then that were probably better, but the Taurus was good. Not great. But good. My reasoning for buying them at the time was that I’d probably have to repair this more often then, say, a Camry, but at about half the cost, at least if I did the work in my garage. I feel comfortable that I was representative of the majority of Taursu owners of the time. The SHO was the most unreliable, but had the highest miles and was very fun to drive. Went through automatic trannies every 100,000.
To me, the price of entry (used) was worth it.
When the redesign in 96 flopped, Ford pretty much gave up on them then and there. Decontenting and the like, guiding it towards the rental lots.
I have to disagree about the “ugly” tag. I think that it is a fine looking auto, in it’s last generation guise. But the 2nd gen were the best looking. Fairly reliable, easy to work on, commodious and, with the SHO, available in a fun to drive version.
First Car: 1973 Ford LTD, shared with Mom. 400 V-8 2 bbl. Handled like a pig on dope. However, saved my bacon when some nimrod ran a stop sign right in front of me. Not even enough time to render the standard surprise “Oh, sh*t!”. Wonderful cruiser, could hold all my friends.
First Car 1A: 1963 Chevy II Nova. 230 cid Inline-6. Bought for $225 in 1976, and drove the wheels off it. Friend borrowed the car and got rear-ended, to the tune of $275 from Allstate for the damage. Sold the car in 1979 for $300. Not a bad return on investment. Stereo: I invested about $400 in stereo equiipment, including a wonderful 8-track tape deck and a pair of Jensen Triax speakers. These were The Sh*t in 1977, by the way. Bulletproof Powerglide (“Hey, where’s third?”) transmission. No power anything, and NO seatbelts.
Unbelieveably, seatbelts were an option. in 1963.
We have owned a Gen I Taurus. Vulcan V-6. 75,000 miles when purchased as a commuter car for the wife. I kid you not, this thing leaked every fluid BUT gas. Tranny, brake, coolant, power steering, and oil. FoMoCo’s notorious Air Conditioning gave out about two months after we bought it. Call a shop: “Lemme guess. 3.0 V-6. Yeah, they all do that. It’ll cost about $1,000 to fix it right. We LOVE Ford here. Yeah, Ford knows all about it, but it’s cheaper to build ’em that way.”
Due to that POS, we will never own another Ford.
I remember Taurus’ being the Future cop Cars in the first Robocop movie…
My first car was a sweet 1981 Ford LTD. I believe I fit 13 people in there once. I bought it for $ 400.00 USD. I put over 30K one it before the Police impounded it…
First car was a ’66 Belvedere I, el strippo I bought for $15. Yes, it ran successfully for 3 months (I invested in TWO speakers for stereo AM…..), was great should I get stopped for the back passengers to lift the carpet squares to get the beer cans through the rust holes in the floor, etc.
One day it caught fire and I just eased it to the side of the road, took off the plates, and walked home.
I believe the Taurus served it’s purpose. Last year my portly office receptionist was looking a car to fit her and was tired by buying used and having to fix them up. For a little over 15k (with huge incentives), she got a new Taurus and it has remained problem free for the first 30,000.
After renting a Taurus and Grand Prix back-to-back, (the GP having leather, sunroof, etc), I’m sorry but the Taurus was hands-down the better driver, better sight-lines, and more comfortable. And it’s cheap plastic didn’t seem as cheap as the Pontiac’s. The killer is that the Taurus probably “listed” for 21-22k, the GP was at 31k. Unbelieveable.
My first vehicle was an 86 Chev Silverado that was a hand-me-down from my dad. If you can learn how to drive in one of those things, you can drive anything.
Took me until car number three to get to a Taurus, but it was an ’89 SHO so the wait was worth it. It was my first post college car and served me well. It was also particularly good for my insurance agent – “You’re 22, you live by Wrigley Field, and you drive an SHO” – at which point he started planning what island in the Bahamas he was going to buy.
The SHO was a hoot to drive and was generally reliable until about 75K miles. At that point, as if programmed that way at the factory, it began to self destruct at an alarming pace, the AC died, rust started appearing on the rockers, miscellaneous parts started falling off the interior and rattles, over and above the ones that came standard, appeard from everywhere. The final nail in it’s coffin was the implosion of the clutch during a bout of hard acceleration out of a toll booth. (Managed to limp it home with clutchless up shifts and matched rev downshifts)
The passing of the SHO also marked another transition in my automotive life. During the time I owned the SHO I got married, had one kid and we were expecting another. No longer was a car personal transportation it was now family transportation. It used to be so simple – figure out how much you could spend then go buy the car you most liked that fit the budget. In family transportation land weird things happen, despite being older and making more money it seems the cash available for automotive folly actually decreases while the importance of cup holders, dual power sliding doors, and maximum seating increases.
For now the SHO will hold a warm spot in my automotive heart as the last car I had where the choice of car was simply a product of buying maximum fun for the available dollars.
While I may be one of the younger members of this board (seeing as I’m only 20), I don’t have as much experience as some of you other older fellows.
The first vehicle I got to drive was my family’s 91 Dodge Grand Caravan. We’d had it since 1993 and it had well over 120,000 miles on it. I drove it for three or four months, but then the transmission finally crapped out. My parents had the same reasoning and philosophy as many of you have already stated: it was fairly large, wasn’t going anywhere fast, and it was about ready to head for retirement anyway.
Following the Caravan, I bought a 1998 Dodge Stratus for $4 grand with 100,000 miles on it. It was a major upgrade from Caravan, but it still wasn’t a sports car. It had some great interior toys (factory 6 disc changer for example) but was still fairly bare bones. I had it for about a year and a half, before I traded cars again.
While driving the Stratus, I had developed an obsession with the Jeep brand and was determined to get a Wrangler. Sure enough, I found a 1998 Wrangler with almost every option I wanted on it, and traded in the cloud car for a piece of 4-wheel Americana. It was a great vehicle for my senior year of highschool, especially helped by the fact it was a total convertable. I did manage to grenade my rear axle when I went off-roading with the local Jeep club, but that wasn’t the worst event that happend. During my freshman year of college, the transmission died a’la grinding itself to death. Some major cash later and I was back on the road with a new tranny, but it just never drove like it used to. My parents were also concerned with reliability, so we’ve traded in my Wrangler for an 05 Magnum SXT, which my dad drives.
I simply inherited my dad’s 00 Jeep Cherokee 4×4. It’s nicer than my Wrangler and does the job, but I still don’t feel like it’s “my car” yet, even though my parents told me it was. I’m currently in the process of trying to acquire a RWD coupe of some sort, but that battle is far from over.
In my 4.5 years of driving, I’ve only been rear-ended, once in the Wrangler, and it caused no damage. I’ve managed to avoid accidents and tickets the same. Personally, I think it’s up to the driver to make good decisions and prove themselves worthy of being able to continue to step up to bigger and better things. (Of course, you need the bankroll to go with)
My first car was a Volvo 240. Everything junior needs to make it home in one piece: great visibility, gutless engine, oversized disc brakes, and a (nearly) indestructible body.
Luckily, it was RWD, so I could have a bit of fun on a slick surface -kids should know what oversteer feels like from time to time.
Not too long ago I rented a Ford Five Hundred and put about 700 miles on it in the course of a week. I was surprised at what a competent and comfortable driving car it is. Unfortunately the bland styling and less than amazing engine seems to have doomed this latest Ford effort. The Five Hundred may well soon be the sleeper bargain used car like the Taurus has been for many.
My first car was a 1984 Nissan Sentra that my mother purchased for me in 1990 (freshman year in college) for $2500. It had 40,000 miles on the clock. I took that car from Indiana to George around 8 times, Indiana to California, Indiana to Big Bend, Texas, and Indiana to Austin, Texas in the span of 5 years.
Not one thing went wrong with the car mechanically. No A/C, manual windows, carbureted engine. I did not care what I was driving at the time, the simple fact that I had a car meant I had freedom.
1992 dodge caravan. now that is a first drivers car. slow as hell, roomy, and great all round visablity
I went through cars at an alarming rate during my early 20’s,but my favorite had to have been a 1973 Caddy Eldorado.Pumpkin Orange with white leather interor.It was in great shape & my uncle could’nt stand to hear my wine-ing to buy it from him much longer.
This rolling tribute to gordes was a convertable—man what fun in the summer.Pain in the butt during winter here in Ohio,but oohh so much fun.
Anyway, we depated ways from one another during a road trip to Pittsburgh in 1996 after a Steelers game.Never found it after someone stole my Beloved.
While I adore the often hilarious metaphors in TTAC reviews this “it does (this) about as much as (insert insane stretched hyperbole)” is getting pretty tiring. That K-fed line in particular strikes out big time.
That said, good review. I especially like this slam dunk of a line, “Ford’s sedan teaches your child that if they don’t study hard…they can look forward to driving this sort of car for the rest of their life”
oh, and whatever happened to 5mph bumpers anyway?
Cars bump things, most notably each other, especially when parking. What’s with the body paint covered 1-mph bumpers that scratch and bend when you merely tap another car politely during a parallel park. Stupid.
OK, my dad was an original. I had a love for antique cars at the time, had joined the local AACA chapter shortly after my 16th birthday. Still didn’t have a car.
So, for my high school graduation gift (class of ’68): A clean, original, 1937 Buick Special luggage-back 2-door sedan. 248ci straight eight, three speeds on the floor, and a gasoline powered heater.
Had that car for almost twenty years. Adored it.
Taurus are great deals for people that wanted a large car for a good deal but don’t care much about handling (like my dad). Pop got a 01 SEL used with everything except leather for $13.5k with 12k miles on it back in 01.
That kind of cash will only get you a corolla used for the same milage. The engine is bigger, the interior is bigger (but not better quality), and everything comes powered unlike the corolla.
Sure, there were things that need to be fixed and trips to the dealer (under warranty, my dad is anal about little things), but after 4-5 visits, it is almost bullet proof. As long as what the people in the taurus car club said is true about the transmission being fixed, this car should easily last 150k miles. After that, we can always rebuild the tranny with the money we saved, or just buy another bargain used car from Hertz.
The prices of used Camry and Accord are so high that we rule them out for any used car purchases.
I’ve had a few rental Taurii, and I do have one particularly fond memory of a Duratec-powered SEL that my wife and I picked up in Buffalo and drove to Toronto & back in, with a side trip to Hamilton, ON. I had rolled my eyes at the thing as we were walking up, but when I realized we were at least getting the DOHC 24v motor, I decided to give it a shot.
Freakin’ thing cruised like a dream at 85mph up Canada’s roadways, had plenty of torque to get off the line comfortably, and other than the inexplicable lack of front legroom (my Contour has a lot more legspace, in a notably smaller frame), it was a great way for me, my wife, and four friends to get from here to there. With the depreciation hit that they take, I’d easily consider one of the 2004 or later loaded models as a cheap knockaround car if I had teen drivers.
I’ve rented lots of these. One time was after spending a few days in a Grand Marquis. The Taurus felt like a sports car by comparison.
Andrew,
Great idea. It’s so practical and level headed that it’s bound for complete failure.
The Taurus is a great first car. Since 2000 it’s been one of the safest cars on the road. It passed the NHTSA 5 star tests without airbags, on structural integrity alone. And it has dynamic safety systems that many more expensive cars are just starting to emulate. But on the Rodney Dangerfield “Get No Respect” scale it rates an 11.
Junior won’t deign to drive one. No cool. And Poppa is too busy being the the kid’s “friend” to remind him that’s either a Taurus or a monthly bus pass. And young girls are the worst.
“Princess” drags Pappa around the car lots like he had a ring in his nose, looking for a used Honda with low miles for under seven grand. (yeah, with a 150k on it)!!!! Princess won’t even consider a Focus.
Moving used Taurus’ to the youth market is a parenting problem, not a marketing problem.
This whole thread seems to be oddly reflecting my life with my first (and current) car.
Dederer says the Taurus has been “practically unchanged for 10 years”, but, styling aside, it sounds like it hasn’t changed since my ’94 LX sedan (nearly loaded) was made.
My dad bought it for all the reasons everybody is saying: it cost only about $2k, easy to repair, it’s too sensible to get me in much trouble, safe enough to get me through it, not a big loss if I do mess up, etc., etc.
It had 84k miles on it when we got it, knowing it needed a couple hundred dollars of serpentine belt, vacuum leak, regular wear-and-tear stuff.
About the time the repair costs evened with the purchase cost (that was the “thunk” of a dead motor mount), we switched mechanics. The new, more honest guy informed us that a Taurus was the only car he would not own under any circumstances, precisely because they account for such a big portion of his income. It was then that I found out about the 3.8L’s infamy and about the even more infamous AX4S, and that I had bought it right at the point (80k-85k miles) where everything on a Taurus starts to fall apart. I seem to be about the only guy on the planet whose AXOD-family tranny is going to last him to 100k miles, though it does have some metal shavings in the fluid.
I could go on all night regaling everyone with stories of the radiator popping just before a long trip, the not-quite-yet busted head gasket, and the time I was helping my girlfriend move, and a loose CHMSL light bulb set fire to her boxes of clothes in the trunk (“uh, there’s smoke coming out from my seat”), but there are much more fun memories:
The front bench means you don’t even have to climb into the back for “extracurriculars” unless the steering wheel gets in the way, and the six seat belts are great for hauling buddies (who aren’t prone to carsickness) along twisty mountain roads at the car’s (low) limits, though the suspension isn’t.
And it’s so much fun to tell such a carload that they’ll have to deal with the heater instead of the AC in triple-digit heat, so that the temp gauge retreats from the red on a long hill-climb.
The lack of a CD player and the presence of six radio presets expanded my musical taste on long drives, and two triple-digit summers without AC ($compressor > $car) taught me to drive with the windows open (except past 83 mph), keeping me in touch with the outside world, instead of inside a numbing isolation box.
My aunt once borrowed the old girl when she was in town and I wasn’t, and I thought to make her a list of all its “personality quirks.” It fit just exactly on one page, typed.
But even though it’s sometimes annoying when the passenger’s window won’t go up and the tappity-tappity sound from the front left can be kind of unnerving when driving late at night in the middle of nowhere, it really does add up to character in my book.
And when I have to start paying for my own gas, and thus must find a car that at least gets better mileage than a full-size pickup, I really will be sad to see her go, and I might even miss bottoming out on every speed bump and having that darned transmission rob me of power right when I think I’m really getting moving.
All our company cars are Tauruses. I say the worst part of these cars is the overboosted American style power steering. I can actually steer with one finger.
Plus, painful seats, worped rotors (all our cars have them), shakes above 80 mph, sloppy handling.
However, they are quite roomy for their size. Plus athough the plastics are low quality the dash does not “snap and crackle” when going over bumps.
Can someone from Ford explain the two foot deep dashboard? What is the purpose of this design?
After driving these for sometime I don’t understand why anyone would actually buy a Taurus.
You should hear some of the comments our Japanese clients have for these cars.
I have had many experiences with Taurii over the years, but nothing beats the time in Colorado when Hertz gave me one equipped with an LNG-fired engine. Talk about gutless… Zero to 60 was measured with a calendar.
When my son (now 11) begins driving in 6 years, he will have a 1963 Studebaker Lark. I kid you not. Small enough to maneuver in traffic, cheap to keep, fast enough to get out of the way of a semi but slow off the line thanks to an automatic with 2nd-gear start. Enough encapsulating metal to shield him from harm, but operational requirements that demand complete attention at all times.
Sometime the old ways are still the best.