The Swaziland Observer gives us evidence that automotive obsession is a worldwide phenomena, with dangerous side effects on marital relations. And for once, I'm snarkless, awed by Dumisa Dlamini's rhetorical brilliance. "These three-legged animals just love their cars and women hate the cars with a passion. From his first income, a man would neglect any sort of expenditure and concentrate on buying a car. There is a time in a man’s life where the color, shape, size and model does not matter. So long as he has a car he can call his own life better, complete and the gentleman blissful. Through his car, he can have most desires of his hearts including the very woman who comes to fight him over the automobile… Will men get rid of their cars or rather prefer their women more than the cars? This is a balance that lies deep in the man’s heart. It would seem a man without his car is like an emu- a big useless and flightless bird. He can’t have his desires, dreams and aspirations met. He cannot even afford to please his woman when his car is not around." Sigh.
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“Sigh” indeed.
believe it or not, my VW has had lower maintenance costs than my last woman.
in addition, it has never required me to celebrate holidays i don’t recognize, spend time with “her family,” wear something stupid, throw out my best t-shirt, you know–just talk
oh for f**k’s sake
…Dumisa Dlamini’s rhetorical brilliance…
Mmmmmm… delicious.
There is a time in a man’s life where the color, shape, size and model does not matter. So long as he has a car he can call his own life better, complete and the gentleman blissful.
Boy is she clueless. It is very simple. The car is freedom. Women are the opposite.
Sounds like she’s exactly right, especially with the bit that yankinwaoz quoted.
“Those ladies with a privilege to drive their men’s cars should have it drummed into their soft skulls that they ought to take extreme care of these machines”
brilliant indeed.
Such raw eloquence leaves us all unusually speechless.
ROFL at the article and responses. They’re all painfully true. My first car was a pile of junk, but I loved it to death. True enough, it was the freedom it provided that I loved rather than the car itself.
My current car is more like an exoskeleton — it feels like an organic part of me rather than some outside being. I take it for a spirited drive through the mountains, then I can’t bring myself to work out because it feels like I’ve already exerted myself. Romantic relationships, in contrast, are far more convoluted and frustrating …
“It would seem a man without his car is like an emu- a big useless and flightless bird. He can’t have his desires, dreams and aspirations met.”
Reading this is like hearing Gershwin for the first time. She is being a little tough on the Emu, I think.
EDIT:
On second thought, this was the greatest part of this article ’cause the hero gets GREAT acction:
“In his battered old Ford Sierra, Steven could be able in one day to see Ntombi at Pigg’s Peak, Nokwanda at Hawane and finally relax with Gladys at Big Bend all in one day.”
Steven likes to party!
A car is about freedom. About throttle response, when you floor the pedal and zillions of ponies pull like there was no gravity. as if god kicked in the rear bumper. Car is about a boy in you. A beautiful caprice that makes you levitate between delight and ability to be worldtrotting. A car is your crossed legs on a dashboard amidst of western prairies where clouds slowly get smoked out from God`s ponderous pipe. A car is your ego, instinctive self proclamation of a mobility king supported by four round pillars. I dare to be extravagant, for those behold the essence of generosity. I dare to spend for my zillion horsepowered baby a heated blanket or a horseshoe for godsped. I dare to be beautiful for i love things that don`t translate into profits, increased value or hereditary gene pool. Car love is about passion , about a big reserve of being young, which you don`t necesarily need to spend, just waking up every morning, realize that you have it!!!! See, you already grinned!!! Got car?