"If demand goes down substantially more than what we are predicting," Alan Mulally told an Automotive News-sponsored industry confab [AN, sub]. "Then we'll fire all our market analysts." Just kidding. In that event, Big Al pledged to "continue to restructure our business to that new demand." While the Divine Mr. M's statement isn't exactly Earth-shattering– what else could Ford do but continue to downsize to match diminishing demand?– FoMoCo CEO's remarks represent the growing realization that Detroit is heading into hurricane-force headwinds. And while GM brass are busy predicting an economic uplift at the end of '08, Mulally is "selling" his company's ability to grasp the proverbial nettle. "It's just so important in business to always be looking through clear glasses — looking at the world and the way it is, the way it's going and have a point of view and then responding… The worst thing is to not look (at reality) and not have a point of view about the future and then not have a strategy and plan that delivers profitable growth in that environment." Look out GM; them's fighting words!

"We're trying to create a feeling in our car dealerships more of a luxury hotel than a car dealership." This according to Lexus NA GM Mark Templin, speaking at the Automotive News [AN, sub] "world congress" (information without representation!). Templin encouraged U.S. Lexus dealers to offer the brand's customers enough upmarket creature comforts that they'll want to "hang out" down at the dealership, quaff a latte, check their emails, buy a car or something. Templin highlighted other advancements in the famous Lexus dealer experience, upon which its 178 purveyors (in 224 outlets) spent a cool billion bucks over the last three years. "They are making their Web sites more interactive," AN breathlessly reported. "Including virtual tours of the dealerships, their vehicles and even staffs." A virtual tour of a staff member? Whoa. That's taking the whole customer relationship deal a bit far, methinks.

I learned to drive in Philly in the winter. Although we were always warned to watch out for the dreaded black ice, the roads where I lived were plowed, salted and gently hilled. So there was little winter drama. The only slip sliding away in my ‘hood: Paul Simon’s doleful tune and the snow-covered mall parking lot where we went for late-night donuts. Flash forward to the winter of ‘07: a family vacation to the mountains of North Carolina in our rear drive Cadillac SRX. Before embarking, I glimpsed a warning on our cabin rental website: “four wheel-drive is a must.” Ch-ch-chains. Chains for fools. Or not.

Sharp-eared listeners to the TTAC daily podcast know that Justin shares his life with a number of canine companions. Single-minded bastard that I am, I've never asked my colleague how many dogs are in situ (situ!), their names or occupations. But I do know that Justin's father is a veterinarian. So clearly, Justin's a dog person and a pistonhead. As such, Justin does not follow the piss-poor example of pop star princess Britney Spears. He doesn't drive with a dog on his lap. Now I know that a mini-rant on the dangers of driving with a domesticated pet perched on your private parts doesn't really qualify for TTAC's hard-edged tell-it-like-it is news, views and reviews coverage; but this really sticks in my proverbial craw. If your local state government can (and does) ban drivers from talking on their cell whilst automobiling, why would they let license holders pilot a couple of tons of metal with a simple-minded animal (sorry Rosie) between them and the car's major controls? Come to think of it, I wonder if our spiritual leader, ex-Car & Driver editor and part-time paramedic Stephen Wilkinson can tell us what happens when an airbag explodes into a dog sitting on a driver or passenger's lap? Or, more generally, what happens when a front seat passenger gets hit with an unsecured pet flying through the air at 50 or 60 mph? Seriously folks, get a pet seat belt. Or, potentially, die. 

Not to add to U.S. auto execs angst, but consider the Federal Reserve Board’s “emergency meeting” to cut interest rates by three-quarters of a percent. It’s the first cut between regularly scheduled meetings since the September 2001 terrorist attacks. While a recession may provide some short-term relief to gas prices, oil analyst Tom Kloza offers this advice (via CNNMoney): "I wouldn't go out and buy that Hummer; It's still prudent to behave as if record gas prices are just one event or one economic recovery away." Mark Zandi, chief economist at Moody's Economy.com tells the AP (via WTOP News): “When the economy stumbles, you have to begin living within your means, or you'll be forced to do so." Example given: Denise Dorman of Geneva, Illinois. To avoid making new-car payments, she’s not going to replace her 12-year-old Jeep Grand Cherokee (with 125k miles on it). If that’s the start of a trend, Chrysler and the rest of the industry are headed for big trouble.

Well that didn't last long. TTAC reader Nick Goddard's claims his love affair with the first official U.S. smart car is still hot and heavy, but four days after taking delivery he's put it up for sale on eBay. When I contacted him by phone, the 25-year-old owner was more than a little cagey about his motivation for the sale, claiming that he didn't really want to sell the car. He's just "curious to see what people are willing to pay." Apparently, his curiosity was piqued by a Manhattan car dealer, who told our nick2ny that someone walked in and offered $10k for a place on the smart waiting list. Anyway, the answer to the question "what's a six-day old 'historic' smart car worth?" is… we'll see. Goddard paid $20,500 for the vehicle, and putting the smart up for auction on eBay obliges him to accept the highest bidder's offer (incurring various penalties if he doesn't). Our man Lang reckons he'll get $5k over sticker. Any other estimates? Oh, and what are the odds smart may want to snag it for themselves?

You can bet that more than a couple of Detroit execs are monitoring today’s Fed rate cut and U.S. stock market slide, wondering if this is it. Meanwhile, BusinessWeek’s Autobeat reports that Japanese automakers' stock prices are suffering alongside The Big 2.8's. Compared to year-ago prices, Mazda’s stock is down 45 percent, Toyota’s is off by 32 percent and Honda’s stock price has dipped 35 percent. This despite the fact that all the automakers expect to post record earnings in March. The underlying logic: when the U.S. economy sniffles, the rest of the world feels a head cold coming on. Long term, bigger picture, Autbeat says Japanese automakers “strong sales in emerging markets” should offset the coming U.S. slowdown, and their range of fuel-efficient offerings put them in a good position to profit from higher U.S. gas prices. Not to mention the fact that if a full-on recession throws one (or more) of The Big 2.8 into Chapter 11, the last men standing will get one Hell of a dead cat bounce.  

In the interest of balanced reporting, we bring you the following thoughts on the Subaru WRX STi from Terry Box, the Dallas News' erstwhile car critic: "Remember how pudgy and plain your old girlfriend looked at the last high school reunion and then you saw her six months later [and] she was cut-and-buff, a woman suddenly with muscle and attitude and presence. That's the way I view the '08 Subaru WRX STI." Yes folks, the same car Jeremy Clarkson destroyed in The Sunday Times gets a glowing review in the Dallas News. Like Clarkson, Box had problems with the myriad of controls festooning the center console. Unlike Clarkson, "it didn't matter." And so it goes. Box gums the car a bit ("you'll just have to accept that Subaru apparently put most of its money into the engine and suspension, not the dashboard and door panels"), and then gushes all over the poor thing ("around 3,000, the fuse gets lit, and the car rushes to 6,000 rpm so quickly that mere mortals will struggle to shift fast enough to keep up with the motor"). At least Box didn't denigrate those who buy the WRX STI and enjoy driving it. But as you'd expect from a car review where advertising limits editorial freedom, the plain unvarnished truth doesn't get a look in. 

Once again, pictures of a new car have leaked onto the web before the manufacturer's official debut date. Sometimes this sort of thing is an actual leak involving skullduggery, corporate betrayal, miniature cameras and journalistic derring-do. These days, it's usually a manufacturer's thinly-veiled attempt to whip-up interest in a relatively mundane product. Anyway, as you can see on Autozeitung's website, the changes to the new Mercedes SL-class roadster are hardly revolutionary. The new bits primarily involve the front clip, where a RetroBig grill now resides (RetroBig is my name, not theirs). The SL's headlights have also morphed, from ugly double blobs to somewhat different ugly blobs. Looking at the front of this thing, you can't help but wonder if the outgoing model's a more reasonable evolution of the old 1990s Mercedes SL500. The next gen's front end looks more like a mutation. Other changes include a hideous bodykit all the way around, fishier gills on the side and an even more schizophrenic interior. Seeing one for yourself in person is the only real way to be the judge. In the meantime, the takeaway word for the new SL: busy.

Ever since Apple hammered their way to advertising glory with their Big Brother Superbowl spot, and probably before, advertisers have saved their biggest guns for the big game. We've got no problem with that. And we can understand why the people signing the checks for these big budget productions get all excited about their multi-million dollar 60-second contributions to America's popular culture (and the TV network's bottom line). But excuse us for not sharing in the excitement to the same extent, and wondering why Audi would think we would. In fact, their pre-game Superbowl ad hype has gone from feverish to dangerously manic to fully-fledged monomaniacal madness. We've just received an email declaring "Soon, a bold challenge to the tired old myths of luxury will be hitting millions of TV screens across the land. A new viewpoint. A new way of thinking. A new era." Yes folks, "You will have a chance to witness the moment that will set the nation talking. The countdown has started." A follow-up missive declares that this new era will be issued in by none other than actor Alex Rocco, who portrayed Moe Greene in the first “Godfather” movie (also "Man with Ice Cream" in the 1973 James Caan comedy "Slither"). One piece of Audi advice we agree with: "Don't miss the moment of truth."

TTAC is often accused of being overly-harsh on cars and the causes of cars. But we've never violated the number one rule in the info biz: don't insult the customer. In his latest diatribe in The Sunday Times, British car critic catapults himself across that editorial line with his usual acerbic style and boot-in-the-ass subtlety. To wit: "There are many ways to tell if someone is a bit thick. You can sit them in a room and ask them to push various bits of plastic into a wooden box… [or you can] ask them this simple question: 'Are you wearing a Subaru rally jacket?' Because if they are, you will need to speak more slowly." And so begins Jeremy Clarkson's opening salvo against Subie fans. Jezza pisses on Subaru drivers ("for the majority of them, there are only eight letters in the alphabet. WRX STIR and B."), rally enthusiasts ("a sport for the terminally gormless") and their four-wheeled object of veneration ("a £25,000 car that comes with fewer toys than an Ethiopian birthday boy."). In case Subaru lovers really are stupid (which is a ridiculous slur), Clarkson's conclusion spells out his message in no uncertain terms. "I think therefore you may have to be a bit dim to buy one." 

Pistonheads insist that Toyotas are a snooze to drive. Toyota agrees. Stockhouse reports that ToMoCo has developed a system that measures driver's eye apertures to see if they're awake and paying attention. The system's camera and image-processing system monitors the positions of the driver's upper and lower eyelids. OK, here's the tricky bit. Toyota says its integrated the eye thingamabob with its Pre-Crash safety Nanny. Apparently, without the eye system, Pre-Crash lets you know a crash is ABOUT to happen. With Big Brother scanning your eyes, Pre-Crash lets you know an accident COULD happen. Anyway, it's just another damn thing electronic gizmo that can go wrong, that your dealer will have to replace rather than repair. Toyota says they will  offer the system on selected domestic (Japan) models "in the near future."

GM Marketing Maven Mark LaNeve is changing his tune faster than a short-circuited juke box. Yesterday, speaking to Automotive News [AN sub], GM's Marketeer outlined the idea of creating metro superstores. LaNeve said he'd run the concept up the proverbial flagpole at the annual National Auto Dealers Association (NADA) convention next month. When the story appeared, LaNeve saw that no one was saluting it. In fact, dealers were firing Howitzers at the damn thing. So Marketing Mark sent a polite message to dealers (and AN) stating "there will be no announcements of any kind regarding any new initiative or change to our channel strategy." In classic GM what-you-thought-you-heard-wasn't-what-I-should-have-said style, LaNeve claimed that the AN story "gave the impression of a major policy announcement of shift in strategy." On the other hand, he also said GM is discussing the cost of real estate in prime markets and the inclusion of "more than one" brand at some locations. What LaNeve didn't say was how many irate phone calls and emails he received from NADA members threatened by his metro megastore misegos.

Soon, the answer to "that thing gotta Hemi in it?" will be "Huh?" While plenty of pistonhead's have debated the current motor's right to that legendary moniker, it may soon be a moot point. According to Automotive News [AN; sub], Chrysler co-president Jim Press says that buyers not of the baby-boomer generation don't have the emotional attachment to the name their parents do. "The Hemi is not the powertrain of the future. It's the powertrain of today." (I guess he followed Pumbaa's advice and put his behind in the past.) So what engine will the next generation embrace as the performance engine of choice? Press reckons it'll be high-performance V6's and electric motors– even though the Hemi will continue for a few more years nestled in the snout of the Ram pickup. Somehow the idea of Paul Revere and the Raiders singing "Forget about your electric motors and your GTO's…" doesn't have quite the same emotional resonance.

Acura’s finest marketing moment comes halfway through “Pulp Fiction.” Our “heroes” have made a mess of things; the boss has called in “the cleaner.” Cut to an NSX (the sensible man’s Ferrari) pulling into the drive. Clearly “the cleaner” is well paid, always in a hurry and has no time to worry about his car. Who but car geeks remember this seminal moment? Where is the NSX these days? In fact, where’s Acura? As Consumer Reports (CR) reported, the answer is simple enough: nowhere.