In the Falls Church News-Press, editor and retired CIA analyst Tom Whipple continues with part four of The Future of Our Cars. Unlike the suitably skeptical Victor Juarez G., Whipple finds the plethora of speculative EV announcements nothing but encouraging: "… there is no practical alternative for personal mobility with the speed, flexibility and comfort that we have become accustomed to except the electric car." Assuming battery technology keeps pace, he writes, massive solar, wind, ocean and biomass power will provide enough juice to keep us happily motoring in all shapes and sizes of EVs, plugin hybrids and serial hybrids (which he calls "extended range" vehicles) like the oft-delayed Tesla and Volt. Whipple doesn't mention "Cleantech" by name, but warns that if we can't build a green infrastructure, or reliable batteries, we face an era of austerity and conservation. Perish the thought.

Yesterday, we pondered which brand has most recently lost the plot. Today's plan was to have you ponder which brand is the most damaged. But why bother? We all know the answer. Hell, dogs know the answer. Mercury was created out of whole cloth to be Ford's entry-level-luxury division. Trouble is that seventy years down the line, Lincoln is FoMoCo's entry-level-luxury (and just barely). Leaving Mercury as… what? I have no clue. No one does. Seriously, what possible purpose does Mercury serve (for us, not Lincoln dealers)? Besides being an over-chromed Ford, does Mercury stand for anything? Put it this way, if Mercury fell in a forest, who'd give a shit? I don't know a single human being who owns a Mercury. Oh wait; I do. A dear friend of mine is a big noise in the Department of Water and Power's Union. When his Oldsmobile 98 finally (and literally) fell apart, he needed a replacement big American barge ("It wouldn't look good come election time if I showed up in a Japanese car"). A Grand Marquis with $9k on the hood was his for the taking. If he could've found a Crown Vic that cheap, he would've bought it. In summary, why hasn't Mullally dragged Mercury out behind the woodshed and put the division out of its misery? I mean, you heard anyone crying over Plymouth lately? 

If there’s anything that makes you swear faster than passing a cop aiming a radar/laser gun at your car, it’s seeing a cop car looming in your rear view mirror. Either way, you’re busted. You’re about to play your part in a carefully scripted interchange with tax-funded law enforcement. How you play your role will have a big impact on what happens next. 

It sucks to be a parts supplier to the auto industry. The Houston Chronicle reported yesterday Blue Water Automotive Systems filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy protection. CEO Michael Lord said this would give the thermoplastic auto-parts manufacturer "the breathing space necessary to continue its operations while reviewing all aspects of (its) businesses for reorganization." They'll be assisted in their efforts by a $1.4m "progress payment" from their largest customer, Ford. There was no indication whether Blue Water's actions would affect Ford's assembly plants. Meanwhile, the AP (via MSNBC) reports spokesmen for Ford and GM told the court handling Plastech's bankruptcy that they support Chrysler's move to get their tools back from the floundering parts company. Neither company has experienced any disruption in their Plastech parts supply, but they're not taking any chances. GM spokesman Frank Sopata told the court "GM does strongly support Chrysler's position regarding the tooling since we have entered into the same agreement as Chrysler and the other major customers of Plastech to reclaim our tooling should it be necessary." What's the bet they'll find it "necessary" very soon?

Step into Ahmed Ibrahim's cab on Valentine's Day and you could get a lot more than a ride from A to B- you could also land a date, says the New York Daily News. The self-proclaimed "cupid cab driver" has spent years driving around the city looking for New Yorkers with lonely hearts, but only offers his services to a select group of passengers. Ibrahim listens to the conversations of his fares, asks them a few questions and then, if he thinks they are suitable, explains his matchmaking services and asks for their number and e-mail. "I want to know if they're the real deal or just a player," and "if you're a player, then forget about it," he says. Cab-rider Martin Karamon met a woman through Ibraham and says "When you live in New York City, nothing is bizarre, but it was a unique experience for sure." Still, cupid's love-arrows don't always hit their mark; Karamon says he might ride in Ibrahim's cab again "because I just broke up with my girlfriend." Oh, and they're still friends. That's nice. I mean who hasn't been through that routine? It's over, "but we can still be friends," she says. While most of us say something like, "oh, okay," what we're really thinking is "Go to Hell, you back-stabbing bitch!" Huh…oh, sorry, it's just an old emotional wound- I'll be okay. Happy Valentines Day, everyone! (You too… bitch.)

Claiming that America's economy is lurching ever more quickly from economic bubble to economic bubble, the founder of iTulip predicts a surge in alternative energy and infrastructure spending – sort of a green bubble. Writing for Harper's [sub], Eric Janszen defined the main economic drivers of "the cleantech bubble:" the need to recover from recession, weakness in the dollar, loss of petrodollar liquidity, loss of energy security and peak cheap oil. As a result, consumers will be faced with a bewildering array of fuels and vehicles: biofuels, electric vehicles, plug-in hybrids, hydrogen fuel cells, photovoltaics, wind turbines, ocean wave energy, geothermal energy, clean coal and even nukes. Janszen sees these technologies becoming the hot, overvalued commodities of the new bubble. At the same time, he predicts corporations will plan and (God forbid) implement the new energy infrastructure to power expensive new vehicles and public transit. Responding in the Association for the Study of Peak Oil & Gas – USA , commentator Dave Cohen notes that venture capitalists (VC) are already looking to invest in what they call “the largest economic opportunity of the 21st century.” Fortunately for cutting edge companies like Tesla Motors, there's a VC born every minute.

For want of a nail, the battle was lost, and for want of a gear the plant was idled. The Chicago Tribune reports this week's cessation of activities at Chrysler's Belvidere assembly plant was due to a broken gear in a stamping press used to make body parts. Belvidere's boffins are taking the dies from the press to another location to try to get the lines moving while they effect repairs. Apparently, no replacement parts for the broken gears are available, and no one at The Crisis Corporation will give an estimate on how long the repairs will take. This is the third time the plant has been idled. Chrysler shut down the plant in January "to adjust inventory." Last week, the Plastech parts embargo idled lines. As several TTAC commentators have pointed out, Chrysler is not exactly hard pressed to get the presses pressing. At the beginning of this month, they had a 45-day supply of Calibers, a 75-day supply of Compass' and an 83-day supply of Patriots. 

Forget all that talk about gas-free Chevys. “Did you miss your chance in the late '60s to buy one of those ZL-1 Camaros with the ‘mystery-motor’ 427 aluminum V-8?” asks Dallas Morning News reporter Terry Box. Well now’s your chance! Come summer, GM will be selling reproduction 427-cubic-inch ZL-1 motors at $21k a pop. "Simply mentioning the term ZL-1 stirs the emotions of Chevy performance enthusiasts," said Lisa Reffett, marketing manager of GM Performance Parts. (Consider yourself stirred, not yet shaken.) The original all-aluminum ZL-1 was “conservatively” rated at 430 horses. GM says the Anniversary motor will be all that, with 450 ft.-lbs. of torque to boot. The “fire-breathing” motor will have a 10-to-1 compression ratio, aluminum port heads, a forged-steel crankshaft and rods; and a dual-plane intake manifold. GM spokesman Tom Henderson reckons the ZL-1s will end up in '69 Camaros. "I think they will appeal to those of us in the baby boomer realm who dreamed of having one of these cars but didn't have two nickels to rub together in 1969," said Henderson. Meanwhile, no word on ZL-1 mpgs, and we’re still waiting for the new Camaro. Oh and we'd like to see the Volt's redesigned [i.e. non-advertisement] sheetmetal please.

So, where were we? Right. After a bit of the usual FoMoCo stonewalling, Ford recalled almost 11 million vehicles (beginning with the 1992 model year) to repair fire hazard flaws in their cruise control and anti-lock braking systems. More specifically, the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration (NHTSA) determined that the fuel rail cross-over hose in said vehicles may crack, which could cause a fuel leak. Consumeraffairs.com quotes NHTSA: “Fuel leakage in the presence of an ignition source could result in a fire." (Ya think?) And now The Blue Oval Boyz are back for round two, fixing the fix that didn't fix the problem. "Safety Recall 08S01" tells owners of 225k supposedly fire-proofed Fords that their rides "may have been repaired using a fused Jumper Harness containing circuit polarity that is not compatible with your vehicle."  In bullshit free form, please? My circuits (and lincolnsonline) tell me that this recall added a fuse to the ground wire, not the "hot" power wire. Oops. Oh, and another 57k vehicles have been added to the original recall. Meanwhile, CNNMoney reports that NHTSA has opened an investigation into similar fires involving a brace of 2007 model year Chevrolet Tahoes. If this turns out badly for GM, they're looking at a recall encompassing at least 400k vehicles. 

GM's record losses last year is Canada's fault– at least part of it anyway. GM CFO Fritz Henderson told Financial Post "three-tenths of a billion" of the $38.7b loss was due to foreign exchange losses. In other words, "This is largely driven by the strengthening C-dollar versus the U.S. dollar and the impact on our balance sheet through the 2007 calendar year." And in spite of CAW president Buzz Hargrove's insistence he will give no concessions in the upcoming contract negotiations, the handwriting is on the wall; Canada is now the most expensive place in North America to build cars. David Healy, an analyst at Burnham Securities: "[GM]'s strategy would likely be to do some hedging and hope that everything settles down. But Mexico and the U.S. are looking more attractive than they were to build future product." Looks like Buzz may be reconsidering his stance, if he wants to keep his union's members employed and paying their dues.

Ever since Cerberus bought Chrysler, they've said they're in it for "the long run" in spite of the private equity firm's reputation as a "strip and flip" operation. On the other hand, we've maintained they'll unload the moribund automaker ASAP, in spite of what the three-headed-dog keeps barking. Apparently Bloomberg agrees with us. In an article about Nardelli's draconian measures to make the company profitable, the news org declares "Cerberus, a private-equity firm, would like to make a profit by selling Chrysler within two or three years. That means turning the ailing automaker into a tightly managed operation that generates cash instead of burning it." What's not clear: if the "two or three years" begins now, or if it started at the time Cerberus took control last May. Either way, look for Chrysler's sale to open the door to the U.S. market for a Chinese or Indian automaker.

According to Wired, Toyota's set to show off the production version of their iQ microcar at next month's Geneva Auto Show. The iQ is as wide and tall as a Yaris and just a bit longer than a smart fortwo. Thanks to innovative design and packaging, the iQ seats four (at least in concept form). Toyota hasn't said what'll motivate their mighty mite, Given its diminutive size, look for a powerplant displacing a liter or less. If the styling stays true to the concept, ToMoCo will have no problem selling every IQ they can screw together. No word on whether they'll bring it to the States. But with gas prices continuing to climb and the smart money on the new smart, it's a good bet Toyota will try to raise America's IQ, or some such pun.

Ever since the Model T hit the silver screen, evading the long arm of the law has been a cinematic theme. From the General Lee outrunning Boss Hogg, to Smokey being outwitted by Burt Reynolds' mustache, the public imagination has always associated fast cars with police pursuit. While the majority of motorists would never dream of trying to outrun the long arm of the law, soon, they won't have to. It'll be resting on their shoulder. Consider OnStar…  

Frank Williams is a retired USAF Lt. Colonel. William C. Montgomery is a credit card executive. PJ McCombs is a third grade teacher. Justin Berkowitz is studying for the bar. Donal Fagan is an architect. Glenn Swanson is an information technology specialist for a school in Connecticut. Michael Posner and Casey W. Raskob are attorneys. Samir Syed is a chartered accountant. Megan Benoit is a computer security specialist. Jay Shoemaker runs Francis Ford Coppola's food and beverage businesses. Sajeev Mehta is a project manager for a software company. Alex Dykes is an IT administrator. Matthew Neundorf is an operations manager for Fraco Products. Paul Neidermeyer is a landlord. Martin Schwoerer is a business/regulatory consultant. Brock Yates is a legend. Stephan Wilkinson is an EMT. I'm tired. And Jonny Lieberman is welcome back to his spiritual home.