In his now-infamous RS4 review, Jonny Lieberman declared the uberAudi "sounds and feels like a volcano making love to an avalanche."  Never having witnessed that particular geologic phenomenon, I'll have to take his word for auditory aspects of the experience.  However, at least one filmmaker thinks it sounds like something from outer space, as this spot shows. Hmmm… I wonder how they'd use the sound of a Toyota Yaris at full throttle? You know; other than for pest control purposes.

Even though GM says they have customers lined-up waiting for Enclaves because demand far outstrips production capability, Gasgoo reports they're going to export them to China later this year. It looks like GM's figured out how to expand their production capacity by at least 5k Enclaves, because that's how many they plan to ship to the PRC to sell through their partnership with Shanghai Automotive Industry Corporation (SAIC). When the Lambda-platformed CUV goes on sale in China in October, it will join the Park Avenue, LaCrosse, Regal, Excelle and GL8 models in Buick's Chinese showrooms. Last year, Buick racked up over 332k sales in China, almost twice the units they moved in the U.S. Oh, and if I was on the U.S. waiting list for an Enclave, I'd have a royal conniption fit over this news. Just sayin'…

According to EV World, smog-choked Mexico City requires taxi companies to replace their rides by their (the taxi's) tenth birthday. This year alone, some 30k Mexican taxis will become autobanditos. Looking for green creds, Mayor Marcelo Ebrard has mandated that ten percent of the new, replacement taxis must be hybrids, ten percent must be electric vehicles (EVs) and ten percent must run on compressed natural gas. It sounds crazy, but thanks to the $8k hybrid premium, Mexico's warm weather and the average cabbie's 200km daily drive, EVs might just work. Hence a consortium of RUTAS UNIDAS (bus and cab operators), Electro Autos Eficaces de Mexico (EAE) and Azure Dynamics (AZD) is developing the eLECTROTAXI®. Like they had to lower case the "e". And while we're at it, let's call this thing what it is: a Nissan Sentra taxi conversion. In a refreshingly honest statement, consortium spearhead Victor Juarez G. (no relation to Kenny G) cautions against speculative announcements. Sr. G says that premature prognostications by Phoenix and Tesla have been harmful to the EV movement. Amén.

Recently. We're not talking Mercury, the automaker that's being driving around sans map for (four) decades. No, we want to know who you think most recently has put match to script. Great candidates abound. Could it be Jeep and the brand-slaughtering Compass softroader? Toyota and their new found love of recalls and unreliability? Maybe Porsche, with its embrace of water cooled SUVs and an upcoming four-door sedan. I'm arguing for Subaru. Subaru? Yeah, Subaru. Rewind your mind to 2002. The WRX had just landed on our shores, completely redefining egalitarian performance. Outbacks were everywhere. Forresters will always be the official car of lesbians, but back then they were the smart alternative to the SUV. The 'Camino'd Baja is a bullet they'd like back. But hey, at least they were trying. In fact, the all-AWD brand was the positioned to become the thinking/poor man's Audi. And pistonheads everywhere knew the STi was on its way. Today? The WRX is not only uglier, but softer. The most expensive model in the lineup isn't the sharp dressed Outback, but the formerly pussy-faced Tribeca. A turd of an CUV that few want and no one aspires to. The new STI is indeed meshugga, but sadly, like the whole of Subaru, not meshugga enough. OK, your go.

Horsepower fetishists will recall that up until not that long ago, we weren't sure if the next Skyline (a.k.a. GT-R) would be sold in the US at Nissan or Infiniti dealers. Turns out it's Nissan. For now. "An Infiniti version is a future possibility. I have not done a study yet, but we are thinking about it." That's Nissan's global design chief Shiro Nakamura talking to Old Blighty's Car magazine. Nakamura adds that the Infiniti version could be a coupe or convertible. We sorta hope it's a convertible, but mostly hope it's neither. Recently, Nissan has done an admirable job of NOT badge engineering it's luxury brand to death. The RWD G35 is NOT a leathered up Altima. The V8 powered M45 is NOT a Maxima on steroids (No, it's a 350Z on HGH). A Murano is NOT an EX35. Etc. (You could argue that the G37 Coupe is nothing but a 2+2 350Z, but nobody would listen.) Why, then, would Nissan start badge engineering now? What pimply-faced, thumb-calloused Gran Turismo addict sits around Mom's basement thinking, "Man, I'd totally buy a GT-R if only it were MORE expensive?" Short answer, none. A counter-proposal. I like fast, smart handling four-doors, be it RS4, M5/M3, C63 or IS-F. The ability to outrun Corvettes on the bad roads fills my heart with glee. Recently, I spent some seat time in an Infiniti G35xS. That's the AWD version. When my handler asked me what I thought of the car, the first words out of my mouth were, "My mom would love it." So yes, I'm proposing a four-door Skyline. To hunt down the uber-Audis of the world. And kill 'em all.

Canadian Auto Workers president Buzz Hargrove knows what's killing the North American auto industry: imports from South Korea and Japan. He's upset that Canada imports more vehicles from Asia and Europe than Canada ships to those areas. His solution? The Globe and Mail reports Buzz wants Canada and the U.S. to ban imports from Japan and South Korea until they open their markets to North-American-built vehicles. Reality to Buzz: they don't want your vehicles. If you've never been to those countries, roads are narrow, city streets are clogged and parking is at a premium. The average GM, Ford or Chrysler product from this side of the globe would fit in there like an orca in a fishbowl. Also, I don't know about Canadian sales, but the majority of Hondas, Toyotas, Nissans, and Mitusubishis sold in the U.S. are bolted together in North America, not imported. He needs to put the blame where it belongs: on the auto companies that sat by complacently resting on their laurels and denying the imports were a threat until they lost customers they'll never regain.

File this one under "no good deed goes unpunished." Boston.com reports that Ford donated four piston assembly patents to The National Institute for Strategic Technology Acquisition and Commercialization (NISTAC), took a $27m tax deduction, licensed the technology back from NISTAC, terminated the agreement, and then continued using the patents paying nobody nothing. One potential issue: does NISTAC own the patents? It claims it's the "replacement" organization for Mid-American Commercial Corp, which received the original dontation. As you might imagine, all this philanthropy went down before Ford hocked its future to stay in business. Ford made the piston patent donation back in 2000– and 44 more besides, on seven separate occasions, to institutions including the University of Michigan and the National Center for Manufacturing Sciences. 

In case you were thinking Chrysler's supply chain was relatively robust– aside from last week's spat with Plastech that shut four factories and caused slow-downs at four more– The Chicago Tribune reports that Chrysler's now idling its Belvidere assembly plant for at least the first shift Wednesday, due to an "unexpected parts shortage." Chrysler spokesmouth Roger Benvenuti told the Trib that the latest disruption– which halts production of the Jeep Compass and Patriot and the Dodge Caliber– was not Plastech-related. He also revealed the astonishing fact that production will resume when parts became available. Meanwhile, no matter how you slice it, this doesn't look good for Chrysler. Either they screwed-up their logistics or they have another Plastech-type dispute rumbling away somewhere in the background. Watch this space…

Politicians around the world were up against the wall. The World Trade Organization (WTO) was slowly picking away at all their fancy ways of sidetracking public funds into hopelessly anachronistic and inefficient agricultural subsidies. And the agribusiness beats the mil/industrial complex when it comes to lobbying skills. Even French politicians, famous for ignoring the plight of their people, tremble at the thought of another tractor phalanx of mad farmers pulling up in front of the National Assembly and launching putrid brie at their doorstep. Enter Peak Oil.

As if it really makes any difference to anyone at this point, The Detroit News
reports that the White House has expressed confidence in GM's long-term prospects. In response to GM's sobering $38.7b loss in 2007, spokeswoman and master of the obvious Dana Perino said "The report from GM reflects what we've known for a long time, which is that the automotive industry in the United States is having some difficulties, and they are trying to work through those. They're trying to restructure. They have a changing marketplace; buyers have different tastes, and there are issues regarding how high their cost of business is." In other word, oops they did it again! But GM needn't worry because "the president believes strongly, the long-term health of the U.S. automotive industry is strong." It'd be interesting to see what the lame duck Commander-in-Chief's handlers would have to say about the situation if he was running for reelection this year, instead of coasting until the moving vans arrive in January. 

GM really, really, really wants to get rid of all their high-paid UAW workers. In addition to the buyouts they're offering to all salaried UAW members, they're upping the ante by offering retirement incentives as well. The Detroit News reports GM will offer workers taking the bribe buyout the option of rolling the payouts into a 401(k) or retirement account. Exactly what they're offered depends on their seniority and job skills. Workers with 30 years or more will be offered $45 to $62.5K to retire with full pension and benefits. Workers with between 26 and 30 years can take leave with reduced pay until they reach 30 years (at which point they can take a regular retirement). Workers 50 years old or older and with at least 10 years with the company can retire early with whatever pension they've accumulated and health benefits. Any worker with 10 or more years is eligible for a one-time payment of $140k to walk out the door; for workers with less than 10 years it's $70k. GM isn't saying how many UAW members they want to eject, but UAW President Ron Gettelfinger thinks they're shooting to reduce their numbers by about 20k. GM is expected to replace them with about 16k new hires, paying them about half of what their predecessors made. Some experts think GM hopes "to turn around its beleaguered North American division by the end of the decade… largely [by] moving out senior workers." And there I was thinking that improving their products was the key… 

Indian car maker Tata has announced plans to export its Nano city car to Europe; albeit in a different form, at a different price, in the future, eventually. Quoted in Germany's Focus Online, Tata's Head Head of Small Car Projects auditioned for the Hindi version of "Promises, promises." "We won't export the current model [unleashed in India this autumn]," Girish Wagh admitted. "But in five years time, we will have developed the second-generation Nano which will be good enough for Europe. The Nano will then meet the Euro 5 emission regulations as well as all crash standards." At the same time, Tata's cheerleader promised to improve on the Nano's fuel consumption, from 47 to 78 mpg. Methinks the Indian automakers' plans for the Nano are a tad… ambitious. The current car's Unique Selling Point is price: $2,500. Add in the safety, comfort and convenience features that the average European economy car driver currently enjoys, throw in the eye-watering sales tax that the average European economy car driver forks over to his government, and Tata's Nano will be bumping-up against the VW Up!, Toyota IQ and other highly accomplished machines, sold from a large number of established dealerships. Good luck with that.

Brand purists that we are, the tagline for the Njection automotive website leaves us nervous about their commercial future: "Speed Traps, Car Forum, Automotive Pictures….Anything else?" Then again, it's taken TTAC six years to get to 20k visitors per day; so what do we know? This much is for sure: there are plenty of speedtraps in this world of ours. Njection's readers have tapped into Microsoft's live maps and plotted tens of thousands of them, around the globe. Think local, speed global? "Over 50-thousand speed traps have been contributed to the site since its Thanksgiving public launch," says Shannon Atkinson, President of NJection.com, in the press release announcing the feature. "This response reflects the feelings of motorist[s] around the world." Terror? Anger? Suspicion? Shannon doesn't say. But he does trot-out the old argument that speeding doesn't kill people; sipping a latte while cell phoning your baby sitter and changing lanes at a red light camera-equipped intersection does. Anyway, Njection promises to make their map GPS device compatible, which could provide the site with a nice tidy profit (provided police or other do-gooders don't upload "fake" speedtraps). Bastards.

Rolls Royce has provided "an exclusive group of journalists" (and Motor Trend) details of the previously announced $250k to $300k "baby" Rolls. BMW's minions said the new Roller won't share the Phantom's V12 engine, nor any engine currently powering a BMW. And that's about it. But it's a good thing, not a bad thing. Despite Bentley's VW Phaeton underpinnings, the new Rolls is positioning itself much higher in the food chain. To do so successfully, it needs its own platform and engine to keep the BMW brand's new money stench at bay. Rollers are nothing if not exclusive. That's why hundreds (dozens?) of wealthy motorists (expensive hotels?) pay full price (minus discount) for a new, customized Phantom (not Phaeton) rather than, say, buying a loaded Phantom with 8000 miles at a 40% discount. The rumors say Rolls' second post-Bimmer model will get a new V12 with north of 500 horsepower. Let's just hope it's doesn't turn out to be a hybrid or anything else less maniacal. On the other hand, if BMW muffs the "baby" Roller, it could be a bonus. The brand's "entry level" model will then be just as absurdly, ludicrously overpriced and rare as its big brother. In fact, even if this new model outpaces Phantom sales by 100 percent, we're still talking Magna Carta-levels of exclusivity. However unintentionally. 

Over the last five years, London Mayor Ken Livingstone has been the paterfamilias of the UK's anti-car jihad. Spearheading this effort: London's congestion charge (CC), a £5/day daily toll to drive into the central parts of the City. Amid charges that the CC is ineffective and inefficient, emboldened by talk of global warming, Ken's upped the stakes. Literally. The Times reports that the daily CC is about to ascend to a whopping £25/day (50 bucks to us Yankees). At the same time, "Red Ken" is closing CC loopholes. The hybrid exemption will expire in 2010 (which is about seven years too late for Lexus's LS600h). But the part that really sticks it in and breaks it off is that London is ditching the exemption for people that live inside the zone. Right now they're paying a reduced rate of 80p/day. Residents within the large Congestion Charge Zone will now have to pay a cruel £6000 per year. Cars that emit less CO2 will still be exempt, which is nice. Mr. Mayor says the estimated £30 – £50m in "extra" revenue generated by the modified scheme will pay for new mass transit systems. And if you believe that, you'll believe Ken doesn't secretly want to ban private passenger cars from the inner city.