By on May 2, 2008

freecreditreport.jpgSorry about that. But I spent a good part of today listening to two of my young daughters singing songs carefully selected to rattle around my brain like a marble in a glass jar. It left me with a strange desire to infect others with any piece of music with more hooks than a bridge full of anglers. It's a world of laughter, a world of… Oops! And that TV ad really bothers me– not just because a Vegas-class hypnotist would have trouble extracting the tune from my subconscious. Or the fact that there's no such thing as a free anything. But what really annoys me: the ad's anti-hero bemoans the fact that his failure to check his credit report means that instead of "a cool convertible or an S-U-V," he ends up "driving off the lot in a used sub-compact." I'm thinking this ad is WAY out of whack with the times, as plenty of SUV drivers would dearly love to ditch their gas-guzzlers for a compact car. Unfortunately, depreciation means it's harder to get out of an SUV loan than stop hearing that damn song. 

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25 Comments on “Daily Podcast: F-R-E-E That Spells Free...”


  • avatar
    Mj0lnir

    Used Sub-compact, thank you.

    It’s a truly unforgettable song.

  • avatar

    Mj0lnir : Text amended. If only changing the tune in my head was that easy…

  • avatar
    tulsa_97sr5

    If I were feeling cruel I’d drop 867-5309 into a comment, but that would be mean on a friday afternoon.

  • avatar
    Strippo

    If I were feeling cruel I’d drop 867-5309 into a comment

    Isn’t that the number for Jesse’s girl?

  • avatar
    Nemphre

    I thought the exact same thing when I saw that commercial, Robert. They must have written it eight or nine years ago, because SUVs are no longer cool.

  • avatar
    bunkie

    The real problem with the ad is the company itself. There is *nothing* free about FreeCreditReport.com.

    There’s a great line from a Firesign Theater album (actually a Proctor and Bergman album):

    “It’s free, just a dollar”

    Only in this case “It’s free, just $120 per year”.

  • avatar
    Strippo

    The real problem with the ad is the company itself. There is *nothing* free about FreeCreditReport.com.

    For the record, annualcreditreport.com, run by the three major credit bureaus, really is free – once a year, anyway. Of course, the credit bureaus will try to sell you stuff during the process, but it’s easy enough to decline the offers.

  • avatar
    Justin Berkowitz

    You know Strippo, you should have more respect for Jessie. And this city. We built this city. On rock and roll.

    Also awesome – 10 minutes, 1 second!

  • avatar
    Strippo

    You know Strippo, you should have more respect for Jessie.

    Point taken, but unlike Jesse, there ain’t no bugs on me. There may be bugs on some of you mugs, but there ain’t no bugs on me.

  • avatar
    Joe ShpoilShport

    If I were feeling cruel I’d drop 867-5309 into a comment

    Isn’t that the number for Jesse’s girl?

    Actually, it’s Jenny Jenny.

    Jenny Jenny, who can I turn to…(EVERYBODY!)

    As for “free”. I was never associated with a band that didn’t consider “Free Beer” as a band name

    And lastely…ish…

    I’m pretty sure it’s spelled…F-r-e-e-*

  • avatar
    ZCline

    Nicely done on the 10 minute podcast. I only take offense at one thing, and Robert, this really isn’t picking on you!

    “In-gear acceleration”. Is there out-of-gear acceleration? Going down hill maybe? Pushing your BMW 750iL out of a plane?

  • avatar
    TexasAg03

    But what really annoys me: the ad’s anti-hero bemoans the fact that his failure to check his credit report means that instead of “a cool convertible or an S-U-V,” he ends up “driving off the lot in a used sub-compact.” I’m thinking this ad is WAY out of whack with the times, as plenty of SUV drivers would dearly love to ditch their gas-guzzlers for a compact car.

    I think the point was that he was stuck in a crappy sub-compact in which his legs were “sticking to the vinyl” and his “posse” was “getting laughed at”. I think the point was about the coolness (or perceived coolness) of a new vehicle versus his old POS.

  • avatar
    Jordan Tenenbaum

    Quick, someone do the Safety Dance!

  • avatar
    ctoan

    I say, how out of touch with your credit history do you have to be that you wander into a dealership looking to buy a “cool convertible or an SUV” and drive out in something that’s worth $1000?

    Although, at this point I’m sure that getting financing for an SUV is only marginally harder than buying a Metro.

  • avatar
    yankinwaoz

    Actually, I think his little mistake saved him from a bigger mistake… paying too much and financing a depreciating asset.

    Instead he can driver his beater for a year, save the money he had budgeted for his car/insurance/taxes every month on the new ride, and pay cash for a better used car.

  • avatar

    yankinwaoz :

    Actually, I think his little mistake saved him from a bigger mistake… paying too much and financing a depreciating asset.

    Instead he can driver his beater for a year, save the money he had budgeted for his car/insurance/taxes every month on the new ride, and pay cash for a better used car.

    Excellent point. But the clear implication is that he won’t get laid. Hierarchy of needs and all that.

  • avatar
    offroadinfrontier

    What about us who just bought a (relatively) NEW subcompact??

    I’m still getting laid…

    If I could find a Geo Metro around here for less than 4K (yes, seriously.. rip-offs), I’d buy it in a heartbeat. But then again, I respect the no-frills no-techno 50mpg car..

    In other words, not all of us need an SUV to be cool ;)

  • avatar
    Strippo

    In other words, not all of us need an SUV to be cool ;)

    Don’t worry, be happy. Is that the idea?

  • avatar
    Steven Lang

    As Freud would have said if cars had been his addiction…

    “Sometimes a car is just a car.”

  • avatar
    offroadinfrontier

    I just don’t understand our culture’s need to place a car as a social ranking, even if based purely on economics. Just because I CAN buy car x doesn’t mean that’s what I WANT, but in this day and age, if you don’t fully expend your means, you just don’t make it to the country club.

    But then again, I guess some of us don’t even like golf, so we keep driving more of what we want than what we are supposed to want….

  • avatar

    I think the saddest thing about that commercial is how it panders to our basest consumerism. Somebody who knows nothing about their credit score looking for a “cool” convertible or SUV in this market is most likely someone who isn’t capable of attaining and holding a job that would allow them to afford such a vehicle. However, with Uncle Sam encouraging us to spend our entire rebate check on big TVs and Gucci purses, it’s hard to escape the debt society that has already landed us in some pretty hot water.

  • avatar
    davey49

    Of course I love how the guys “bad” credit forced him to buy a crappy car. Cause, you know, he couldn’t just wait around for a good cheap car to show up.

  • avatar
    John Williams

    If that were to happen, the commercial wouldn’t have as much impact.

  • avatar
    golden2husky

    Actually, the SUV can be a mobile bed…try that in a subcompact…

    I think the saddest thing about that commercial is how it panders to our basest consumerism…

    Remember after 9/11? Our government was quick to say “go ahead and shop”…George Carlin did a great skit on this…If we don’t head to the mall, the terrorists will win…

    If you really want to have an ad-song stuck in your head, on “Youtube” search for “iO digital cable”…

  • avatar

    the real kicker is that sub-compact is TOTALLY COOL!

    Grab a Honda B16, B18, hell, even a K20 will cram into there with the right parts – you’ll have a little rocket ship that can embarass an EVO or M3.

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