One of the best hands in No Limit Texas Hold-em: pocket kings. Cowboys. It’s a real monster. However, it’s quite vulnerable to middling hands such as Ace-Six offsuit. So the thing to do is to raise– and raise big. That way, you charge your opponents to see a flop. However, if you raise big every time you have a good starting hand, your tactic will become quite obvious to everyone seated at your table. They’ll just fold because a large raise from you means aces or kings. Not a very profitable habit, long term. How to combat this? Variance. While two kings are vulnerable, they aren’t that vulnerable. Maybe 20 percent of the time you want to just check your monster and limp in. Here’s the problem: how do you know when 20 percent of the time is? Solution: a watch with a sweeping second hand. Huh? Jump.
This particular trick is from “Action” Dan Harrington’s excellent series of poker books. Your brain just isn’t set up to allow for true, deceptive variance. So, let a machine do it! Meaning that every time you get dealt two kings, glance at your watch. If the second hand is between 48 and 60, that’s 20 percent. Limp. My problem is, I’m part of the cell phone gap generation. We don’t wear watches. Meaning I had to buy a piece of “specialty” paraphernalia. Now, I could’ve skipped down to the liquor store and bought a $7 watch with a second hand. But I’m weird. So instead I opted to see what my friendly neighborhood pawn shop had to offer. Hey, times are tough; let’s make someone else’s loss my slick, profitable gain. But, rather than make what you might call a “smart” decision, I bought a Soviet submariner’s watch. You should see it. Beautiful blue face with a big red commie star at high noon. Cute little white submarine above the symbol for the Russian Navy. And of course the all important CCCP down on the bottom. Hey, if I’m going to seriously pursue one of the most grossly capitalist endeavors there is, why not hedge it a bit? Tongue and cheek, to be sure, but this is one slick looking time piece.
Of course, the point of the watch is that the second hand would sweep around and this would make me a trickier, more deceptive (and richer!) poker player. I guess I didn’t think hard enough about the “Made in USSR” part engraved on the rear. Just 22 hours after I talked the guy down from $76 plus tax to $60 out the door, the watch stopped working. I was pissed off, so I banged it against my desk. Suddenly the second hand began sweeping. Yup, that’s right– just like the Mir space station in Michael Bay’s Armageddon, a few good whacks gets the gears going again. I believe this is known as the “Brezhnev Method.” What on earth does any of this have to do with cars? Well let me tell you.
As you know, I do a lot of driving. My own car is a manual. Most of the press cars I request are manuals. I’ve become pretty good at heel-&-toe (where you mash the brake and the gas at the same time with your right foot while downshifting). Obviously, big clunky shoes don’t cut it. Sometimes you miss the throttle all together– or worse– get your foot caught under a pedal. Not only embarrassing (if you have a passenger) but dangerous, too. Lightweight, thin shoes are par for this particular course. Of course, any time you get into specialty anything, you’re talking $$$. Not that I’m a cheapskate, but wandering around in driving shoes kinda brands a big “dork” on your forehead. So what did the ever-so-creative consumer (me) do when he realized his cross-trainers were the wrong tool for the job? Wrestling shoes! Brilliant, right? Only $40 at any sporting goods store and I could wear ’em to the gym. Perfect. I’m so smart, etc.
Then came the day when I was actually at a track and I had to stand in the completely support and padding-free wrasslin’ boots for ten hours on hot asphalt. If I had a chiropractor, he/she would’ve slapped me. Just yesterday I received my second pair of Pilotis: orange and black Prototipos with a “heel-&-toe reinforced lateral side of the right shoe.” I can hear you screaming “Dork!” from here. And I don’t care. Now I’ve just got to convince my girl that spending $250 more on fire proof underwear for the outside possibility that I might get to split $1,500 in nickels five ways is a “smart” investment. You?
I do, starting from the top with Borsalino hats and continuing with a myriad of other things including some pretty trick underwear. My boys deserve a good home don’t ya know.
However, one should keep in mind that a watch may be a timepiece, jewelry or both, but never clothing. And on that subject, I’d be wary of any Soviet-era military watches containing radium. You might not want to be wearing it when adjusting your bat wings.
I wear specialty clothes when I ride my motorcycle. Car? Not so much. I do have shoe preferences to downshit/revmatch.
My feet seem too big/awkward to heel/toe on the STi, so I brake, then downshit/rev match & let the clutch out.
Robstar: I wear a size 13 and heel-&-toe everyday on a WRX and did so when testing the STI — you need some Pilotis!
Austin: I know… “Specialty Jewelery” sounded weird. As did “Specialty Stuff.”
And… it doesn’t smell like there’s any Radium…
Well Jonny, if you’re wearing size 13 footwear, it’s going to take more than a little radium exposure to knock you out.
I find my Chuck Taylor All-Stars work great for heal and toe. Good enough for my meager skills anyway.
Much like Alton Brown, I hate uni-taskers.
Heel & toe with my heel & toes. Flip -flops are my favorite driving shoe. Since I typically only have my Miata out in warm weather, it’s easy to kick’em off and get a good feel for the pedals. Monkey toes also help a lot.
1996MEdition: I probably shouldn’t say this, but… 100% agree.
I cut bevels in my wingtips, down on the heels. Beltsander.
Now I can drive the Miata to work with my work shoes on. Otherwise too big and cut carpets.
Nobody seems to notice at work. Many there wear crumply ill fitting suits to start with, or are obese anyway, likely assume my shoes are just worn out if they even spot it.
Weekends I have soulless moccasins from somewhere in Minnesota. Work fine for driving and very confortable.
I find my old running shoes work well enough for driving. They’re lighter than cross trainers, better cushioned and have better ventilation. Just steer clear of anything with a mushy heel.
I just dropped $350 on a pair of carbon fiber soled SIDI cycling cleats…and that was the super cheap ebay price!
Pretty much tell my wife it is either cycling or meth, she chooses the bikes every time. Me road bike racing is fast enough, a car is just trouble.
My pain clinic doctor wears Piloti’s in the office, he says they are comfortable.
Hey Jonny,
What’s the question? You got me so pondering my (lack of) hold em skill..I can’t remember. Here’s one for you: How much do you hate big slick? I go out on that hand almost every tourney…fing hate it. I got it again after being shuffled to a new table last weekend and decided to play it tight/weak and fold it after someone moved all in in front of me. Didn’t see another card the entire night and limped my way out. What an fing pvssy I am!
Oh yeah, the question. Try some of the Puma’s that were all the rage with mid-manager types in LA 5 years ago. They are narrow, thin soles and are similar to Piloti/wrestling shoes but with support.
I received some for Christmas a few years back and felt too much like a douche wearing them, but then realized they were a decent driving shoe and started bringing them to the track.
Good gawd that was a long-winded backstory to get to the point of the article, I was starting to wonder where it was going towards the end.
I’ve driven in everything from sneakers, hiking boots, mountainbike shoes, and a cast on my right leg from the foot up to the knee. I even drove myself to the hospital when I broke my ankle and fibula. Accelerating by pushing down or pulling up on your knee is lots of fun when your leg’s in a cast. Between driving in size 13 hiking boots and a cast, the cast was more difficult, left foot braking was interesting too.
Peakay: Big slick is still a monster, but remember, it’s the sixth best starting hand (well, suited at any rate).
I play it like all my hands — raise 3 1/2 times the big blind 90% of time, limp 10%.
If someone goes all-in do I call? Almost never. If I’ve seen the person pushing all-in repeatedly then sure, call. But, Pushing all-in if your stack is larger than 5-7 times the big blinds is stupid in a tournament — even if you have aces.
if the person pushing is short-stacked, call. if you’re short stacked call. But, if you have a middle stack and so do they — run.
My point? I love big slick. But yeah, people way over play it. Technically speaking, it’s crushed by a pair of ducks.
And when your stack dwindles to 3-5 times the big blinds, you should be pushing every hard, regardless of your cards.
Usta Bee: Excuse me for writing.
For camping trips, we have gear we bought from specialty outdoors shops. For horseback riding, we wear English breeches and boots. In both situations, it’s the engineering, not style. The good (i.e. expensive) camping gear works better than the cheap stuff. Breeches and boots have been perfected over centuries of riding.
Size 13 Pilotis.
Jonny: Thanks for making me feel semi-OK…I didn’t play it wrong, but the hand is torturing me.
I’ve wanted Pilotis for a long time, but my wife thought I’d look like a Dork. Ha! I think they are cool, but I hope you are rocking only the ones with no white or neon on that page.
I wear Nike Free’s for everything.
Does a sparco sweatshirt count?
Johny,
a) you are adopted – size 13 is not allowed in our tribe
b) try to fit in and be a mench get a Rolex (if you really want to be that different IWC)
I knew this was going to be about shoes from the title. I actually bought my current shoes for driving. Got two pairs of soft-soled Rockport shoes — fairly cheap, normal enough to not raise eyebrows at work, and they feel like slippers.
I’ll tell ya what really SUCK for driving a manual trans – Keen Newport sandal/shoe thingys. 40-lb soles make for very poor pedal feel. Combine with an uber-grabby Subaru clutch and you’re on your way to Head Toss City with a possible pit stop at the Dropped-Clutch Choke-Off Ranch.
Admittedly my big hammy size 13s are completely unskilled at manipulating the brake and accelerator just right in the synchronized, traditional heel-toe fashion, but I’ve got the rev-matched downshifts down to an art and have found a way to smoothly transition between gas and brake… so my favorite footwear is… nada. Barefoot. Au nautrel baby.
Now that I’ve finally pulled the trigger on a Miata, I want a pair of Pilotis. And a Top Gear t-shirt. Donations accepted.
Usta Bee: This is Jonny’s Jeremy Clarkson post of the week.
Johnny Lieberman: Those russian submariner watches are all mechanical. You are supposed to wind them up every 24 hours. Could that be the problem?
I have one similiar, and I just have to tell you the story about it, even if it is not car realted. Fifteen years ago, my father had gotten one of those on one of his business trips. He was a very sweet man, so when I asked him if he perhaps could get one for me the next time, he just took it off his arm, without a word but with a big smile on his face, and gave it to me. Here you go, he said. Enjoy… And it was one of the best gifts he ever gave me, because it was so sudden and out of the blue. But he was a very loving man, my father…
BC x2 My driving shoes are a battered pair of Rockport boat shoes.
I have a number of Jeep t-shirts and related items (long sleeve shirts are must for when the Jeep’s top is off), plus clothing for hunting. Other then that, I don’t need any as I do have an office job but I can wear jeans all the time. :)
No specialty stuff for me, but I do manage to heel-toe in my size 12 steel toe Timberland Pro work boots. I have the 4″ diameter bare spot on my floor mat to prove it. Must be that my full-size truck (with 5spd of course) is built for such footwear. I did have a rental car slushbox once that I couldn’t fit those shoes between the accelerator and the dash plastic (can’t remember if it was a Caliber or a Cobalt).
Having grown up in a small South Texas town my feet have always felt most comfortable in boots and when it comes to driving it’s no different. I’ve got a particular pair of narrow cowboy boots with well worn leather soles that do just nicely for heel-and-toe. The right pair of cowboy boots can be pretty thin, especially after I’m done wearin’ ’em out.
specialty clothing is awesome