I live in Michigan. Not on the Detroit side of things, around here it’s mostly suppliers. I’m an engineer. As I write this, I’m off on unpaid furlough. I don’t work in the auto business; my company is in an industry about 10 bailout levels down. But around here, it all looks the same. Two years ago the Delphi fuel injector plant was shut down; two months ago the big GM stamping plant was stamped for extinction. Winter even came a bit earlier this year. It’s cold, damp, gray, and we got some snow before Thanksgiving. Not unheard of, but not exactly welcome. I think it was P.J. O’Rourke who remarked while flying over the “liberated” but still depressed Eastern Europe, “Communism is the only form of government you can see from 30,000 feet.” This economy is like that. You can see it of course, but it’s also cold and gray and it hangs in the Michigan air.

Like any good scandal, Jet-gate threatens to unfold like a wedding napkin. As TTAC pointed-out when Alan Mulally was hired, Ford’s $25m p.a. CEO’s perks include free, non-business-related jet travel for his wife and family. And now Bloomberg reports that GM has asked aviation regulators to block the public’s ability to track The General’s squadron of Gulfstream jets. “We availed ourselves of the option as others do to have the aircraft removed” from a Federal Aviation Administration tracking service, Greg Martin, told Bloomberg. The spinmeister “declined to discuss why GM made the request.” Which raises one important question: what are they hiding? To be charitable, we could take GM’s previous statements about CEO Rick Wagoner’s personal security needs seriously. Other than that, we can invoke Bertel Schmitt’s (TTAC’s man in China) reports that The People’s Republic are ready to talk turkey with GM about a Chinese buyout/rescue plan. Perhaps Wagoner plans on hopping the Pacific to do the dirty on his detractors. One also wonders if this tracking thing works backwards; have GM execs been partying like it’s 1999? Has Rick been stashing wads of cash off-shore? Anyone know how UAW Gettelfinger got to Washington?

Brussels just ratcheted up the thumbscrews they placed on Berlin: “Either drop that VW-Gesetz now, or we’ll see you in Europe’s High Court. You’ve go two months.” Automobilwoche (sub) has the story in German. In case you don’t know: The VW-Gesetz (VW-law) was written to give the state of Lower Saxony veto power. Lower Saxony holds 20.1 percent of Volkswagen. According to German law, a minority shareholder must have 25 percent to exercise veto power. Lower Saxony didn’t want to spend the extra money for the extra shares. A law was passed instead. For a long time, this law was seen as a weapon to ward off foreign raiders and other riff-raff: Who wants to take over a company they can’t boss around? Now, the law bothers two parties:

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Will Daimler and BMW be Germany’s Ford and GM? Germany is worried about its two prides and joys: “Some senior executives already question whether Daimler and BMW will survive the crisis as independent companies,” writes Der Spiegel, translation via Business Week. “And close examination reveals that both companies have significant Achilles heels.”

“The biggest risk for BMW stems from its successes in recent years,” writes Der Spiegel. “BMW has almost doubled its car sales since 1999, and since 2007 the Bavarian carmaker has been the world’s top seller in the premium class.” Now, BMW sits on $25b of car loans and leases, backed by cars with increasingly dubious residual value.

Second risk for BMW: Customers, shame on them, buy the wrong cars. Instead of buying big bore 7 and 5-Series Beemers, as they should, customers suddenly insist on smaller models and lesser engines. BMW’s Munich-based engine factory is caught unprepared. “We are producing the wrong engines,” says Manfred Schoch, the chairman of BMW’s works council. Eight-bangers, even six-cylinder engines are piling up unsold. Daimler is even more distressed.

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Good morning! Lots of turkey ahead for you. The rest of the world has already provided its share of turkeys. While America Slept (WAS) is a daily round-up of the news that happened in other continents and time-zones. TTAC provides round-the-clock coverage of everything that has wheels. Gobble up the news! Maybe not on an empty stomach.

No EU auto bailout. The EU has released details of its stimulus plan. It’s a yawner. $257b, that’s all? Wait, there’s less: Brussels announced the plan, then told its 27 members: “You pay for it.” We predicted it, and Stratfor (sub) agrees: “It seems that no member state will bail out any other member state.” Also as predicted repeatedly by TTAC, not a word on EU auto bailouts. You’re on your own! You’re on your own!

Les Miserable: The same day, France’s Prez Sarkozy said he would announce a “rather massive” plan in the coming days to support French automobile and building industries. His plan will also help dealers and subcontractors. AP has the story. With so many recipients, the pickins will be slim. Sarkozy announced the plan after talking to Germany’s Angela Merkel. Expect some kind of plan from Angela as well. As in: “Europe: Buy German.”

No money under Opel’s Christmas tree. The German government asked Opel to provide hard data on why Opel needs money and how much. Opel returned devoid of data. “We had to send them back home” said a grumpy German government source to Die Welt. No data, no money. German observers smell two rats. Rat #1: Opel doesn’t have the data. Rat #2 : The data are so bad that Opel doesn’t want to show them. What smell you? And there’s more bad news ahead …

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Everyone else, notify your next of kin. Bloomberg attributes the all-too usual “people familiar with the matter” with the revelation that GM is “studying whether to shed its Saturn, Saab and Pontiac brands in addition to Hummer.” And what price are they putting on the three brands? $12b worth of government “bridge loan.” There goes the argument that the bailout is about saving jobs.  Of course, proving TTAC right (and doing what they say would happen if the loan didn’t go through) isn’t going to the only tough pill to swallow if the RenCen is serious about going through with this. A nasty little business called state franchise law awaits this oncoming freight train, potentially putting taxpayers (not to mention General Motors) on the hook for billions more. You know, since “bankruptcy is not an option.” Putting 82-year old brands on the block? That’s another matter. Anyway, old-school Saab enthusiasts rejoice, Pontiac faithful start looking for a white knight, and everyone with a job on the line, buckle up. The BOD is scheduled to review a proposal Nov. 30 and Dec. 1, and GM will then prepare a 10- to 12-page public document and a private, more detailed plan of about 80 pages with background material. Until then it’s just one big, white-knuckle thrill ride.

In honor of the imminent celebrations, Consumer Reports has picked its “Automotive Turkeys” of 2008, and they got some good ones. Tax credits for Hybrid Tahoes, Chrysler’s four-week Aspen/Durango Hybrid reign of terror, Acura’s styling, the Smart’s pricing and much more get the thumbs down from CR’s Mike Quincy. In advance of TTAC’s Ten Worst awards, I’m asking: what makes your list of automotive blunders for 2008? Personally, the Volt transformation, the bailout beggary and Chrysler’s Project D(isaster) would be near the top of my list. Yours?

For lo, Robert Nardelli hath descended from the mountain, and yea verily he has a plan! “The company … is ready to share our plans for returning Chrysler to profitability as we move beyond this unprecedented financial crisis,” says Bob the Builder in a memo to employees that was leaked to Reuters. The memo clarifies that government funds would be used to support Chrysler’s ongoing operations, including obligations to pay wages and suppliers, fund health care and pensions and to continue future product development. Not a penny will go to Cerberus. In even less surprising news, Bloomberg reports that Chrysler expects to meet its 24 percent workforce reduction goal with few, if any, involuntary layoffs. Apparently Chrysler’s employees are finding buyout offers more compelling now that the company is in the federal begging business. “There is some reasoning here that is telling people there is more security in unemployment than in staying with the company,”says automotive corporate recruiter Ed Crowder. “If they don’t take it now, they are feeling we may not get anything in three months.” Chrysler expects “minimal, if any, involuntary layoffs come the end of next month,” according to spokesfolks.

Popular Mechanics reckons “GM’s current precarious situation didn’t come about overnight.” Ya think? “Over the past few decades,” writes PM scribe John Pearly Huffman, “GM put some truly terrible products out on the market. Unreliable, uninteresting and flat ugly, these were cars that simply destroyed GM’s reputation.” The usual suspects get their due as PM hands it to the Vegas, X-Cars and Azteks that we all know and hate. But there’s a touch of controversy too. The EV1 was certainly no runaway success, but was it a “car that destroyed GM’s reputation”? I’m not so sure.  And then there’s the 1991-1995 Saturns, again not without its flaws, but probably not a permanent stain on GM’s character. Where’s the last-gen Malibu, a car that cemented the mental association between GM and rental fleet mediocrity? Or the Volt, which proved conclusively that GM is no longer a reality-based automaker? I guess everyone has their favorites…

CAR Magazine runs first official renderings of the Aston Martin Rapide.

Trying to steal someone’s thunder?

While the Detroit 2.5 are busy writing plans, maybe they should take a page out of the competition’s playbook. Or maybe not, if they want to keep their jobs. Kim Jong-eun, has been CEO of Hyundai North America since December 2007. “Has been” is the operative word. He’s gone after having been on the job for less than a year. North America accounts for a fifth of Hyundai’s global sales, and Hyundai is the world’s fifth largest auto maker. They want to change both. They are now looking for a local, Reuters reports. The way things stand in Detroit, there should not be a shortage of possible applicants. Or maybe, there is. The job is hazardous. Kim was the third chief executive for Hyundai North America to be fired in two years. The Koreans seem to have a low tolerance for fools failure.

The House Financial Services Committee will reconvene for another round of auto industry bailout hearings at 9:30 am on December 5, reports Automotive News [sub].  The committee did not release a witness list, but it is expected that the CEOs of General Motors, Ford Motor Co. and Chrysler LLC will appear for a second round of begging. We’re also learning that each company is expected to provide two documents to Congress. One would be a shorter, public summary. The other would be a longer, detailed document including proprietary information, to which Capitol Hill access would be tightly restricted, according to GM spokesfolks. Needless to say, TTAC will be posting the public copies, and would be more than happy to post the restricted versions as well, should any principled public servant feel that they deserve public review. You can find our contact form on our navigation bar at the top of your page. Meanwhile, the Senate Banking Committee has yet to schedule public hearings, and we’re still waiting to see how this will affect the planned caravan of love from Detroit to DC. We’ll keep you posted.