In a press conference today, congressional leadership announced that it would not shut the door on a possible automaker bailout, giving the Detroit 3 until December 2 to come up with a plan to restructure their businesses. Which means the three stooges could be back in DC for an encore performance of their hit comedy routine “$25b, Please.” “The best way to proceed is to give them another opportunity to make their case, to the Congress and the American people,” says Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (D-NV). “The key here is accountability and viability. That’s what we’re seeking. That’s not too much to ask.” Or is it? The compromise that was reached earlier today was nixed by Reid and Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi (D-CA), not because it lacked accountability, but because it would likely have stripped efficiency retooling requirements from the already-appropriated $25b loan fund. So, instead Pelosi and Reid assigned an essay to Detroit’s CEOs entitled “how I would spend $25b to turn my company around.” The due date is December 2, and they must be typed and double-spaced. Don’t forget to show your work.
Once plans are submitted, they will be reviewed by the House Financial Services Committee. Senator Chris Dodd (D-CT) also said his Senate Banking Committee was prepared to hold additional hearings as well. In short, we should all get an early Christmas treat in the form of a suitably humbled Detroit contingent jetpooling to DC for what we can only expect will be some far more contrite testimony. Unless of course they follow UAW boss Ron Gettelfinger’s lead and pretend like the hearings never happened.
Meanwhile, the White House is a bit miffed that Reid blocked a vote on the afore-mentioned compromise, which the President supports “Unfortunately it looks like Sen. Reid just wants to pick up his ball and go home for the next two weeks – two months – for vacation,” said White House spokesperson Dana Perinno. Reid shot right back that the President can instruct Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson to bail Detroit out with TARP funds any time he wants to, if he feels so strongly about it. Bush and Paulson have already ruled this option out. So, it’s back to the old waiting game.
That’s how the Dem’s do it. Sternly worded letters, a little bit of “did you fly commercial?” and then it’s just “grab what you can!”
So, instead Pelosi and Reid assigned an essay to Detroit’s CEOs entitled “how I would spend $25b to turn my company around.” The due date is December 2, and they must be typed and double-spaced. Don’t forget to show your work.
Funny. I can just picture Wagoner, the night before the report is due, with piles of balled up paper on his desk, scribbling out his plan with his pencil, eyebrows knitted and his tongue curled over his upper lip.
This will be really hard for him because nobody’s ever made him come up with a plan before.
“The best way to proceed is to give them another opportunity to make their case, to the Congress and the American people,” says Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (D-NV).
Translation: “The bailout is yours. We just need to distract the American people with another ‘crisis’ for the next to weeks so we can sneak this $50 billion right past them while they’re not looking.”
Did Perino really say that about Reid taking his ball and going home, or was that a TTAC summary?
@ Cicero:
I think Wagoner’s report will just be doodles of Volts and hybrid one-tons.
Anyone wanna bet the entire $25 bill on whether or not these dopes fly commercial next time?
Frankly, I hope they don’t and I hope they do get the $. It’ll clearly show what a sham this whole new Democrat rule is going to be.
Casual: Straight copy and paste, amigo.
Sounds to me like the politicos just want to make the evning news, and like having the bosses of the D2.? humbled in front of them. Is it because they couldn’t do it to Wall Street, or were they all bottle-fed as babies?
I agree with many so things posted by the B&B so when they get back to Washington on Dec 2, the CEOs should say 1/ GM is selling itself to China, so “sorry about the closures in the US, but one of the conditions is to headquarters in China – byebye Ren Centre”; 2/ Chrysler is suspending operations until… 2010 or forever – lock the gates and the UAW can sue. BTW, Cerburus will take a tax write-off on this – thankyou, 3/ Ford to say “thanks but no thanks – we’ve got a shot at making it so, bye”. And walk out.
At the press conference on the steps of the Capital RI Rick can then say to the American public “we get the message – you don’t want us so 2 of us are taking the hint, but Ford wants a shot at making itself more attractive to you – good luck buddy”.
Unfortunately this will never happen, like a previous editorial asked “where’s their balls?”
Asking these guys to plan what they would do with the bailout money is akin to asking Don Rumsfield how he would plan the occupation of Iraq, and likely as ineffective once the “plan” is revealed.
Any worthwhile plan to salvage something better than Chapter 11 from a bailout must include details on how one or more of these manufacturers can regain a competitive footing even with an influx of cash. The details will have to include union concessions and a clear plan to drive both the cost and quantity of management layers to where they match or better Toyota. The engineers have proven they can engineer better solutions, the workers have proven they can largely hit Toyota’s quality marks, but management has not shown that they can manage their way out of an afternoon rain shower, much less the perfect storm in which they find themselves.
ROAD TRIP!
They’re all going to pack a lunch and carpool to DC in a van… I can see the boys sharing their juice boxes and reading their essays to each other along the way…. pausing to say the big words real slow for Ron.
As they pass through Pittsburgh on the PA turnpike they’ll take a short but scenic detour along the Mon River and through the Steel Valley to show Gettelfinger what happens when a union takes a blood oath to fight to the last man standing. …..it’s not pretty.
Then a brief stop in Gettysburg for some sightseeing.. …there’s a metaphor there somewhere.
Then on to the big city to read their winning essays to the grownups.
“The key here is accountability and viability. That’s what we’re seeking. That’s not too much to ask.” – this is very logical. So if those factors don’t exist today they can be manufactured in 2 weeks?
So these guys show up, perform poorly, and get a mulligan. WTF?
Harry Reid and Nancy Pelosi: “We demand accountability and a plan. That’s okay you guys didn’t prepare for our pop quiz these last few days. Go back to Detroit with this take home test. Come back in a few weeks and read it back to us (out loud). We promise, we’ll put a smiley face on each of your papers and give you money you haven’t earned and don’t deserve as your reward”.
Notice the difference here in party approach:
Dems – Say you want accountability and then not hold accountable the leaders of the D3
Reps – Say you want accountability, and after clearly not receiving it, tell the D3 “leaders” to pound sand.
ROAD TRIP!
Word has it, that the boys will stop at the Mexican conference in Troy, Michigan on Dec 4. The conference is for businesses thinking of relocating to Mexico.
Just a rumor, but seems Gatelfinger will skip the conference.
http://www.globalautoindustry.com/WardsAuto_MexicoConference_Dec_4.pdf
A gem in the WaPo column by Dana Milbank about the ordeal of the Big 2.8 CEOs at congressional hands:
So it was hard to feel sorry for the executives when Rep. Peter Roskam (R-Ill.), late in the hearing, reminded them again that “the symbolism of the private jet is difficult,” and mischievously asked the witnesses whether, in another symbolic gesture, they would be willing to work for $1 a year, as Nardelli has offered to do.
“I don’t have a position on that today,” demurred Wagoner (2007 total compensation: $15.7 million).
I guess Red Ink Rick’s commitment to salvaging the company only goes so far. Baby needs new shoes!
@ TaurusGT500:
Awesomely picturesque writing – you put me right in the van with them. Perfectly over-the-top, particularly with ‘the grownups’ bit.
Casual Observer nails it – the bailout’s going to go down, just under cover of some other crisis. Now, what’ll they manufacture this time?..
The public will get to see an honest to God plan from GM finally. Or is this something the Senate will keep hidden and just tell the public to trust them that the plan will work.
I really want to see what they come up with, particularly GM and Chrysler. I’m putting money on it being more BS like all the PR sh*t we have been getting for the last year about EV’s and alternative energy development and cutting more workers and closing plans and making big bucks in 2010 when the government pays the VEBA for them. Will it address any of the real problems, to many brands, dealers, old business model, lack of product development, stupid management, etc.
I can’t wait to see this plan.
Is there a lawyer in the house?
I am confused. Can the car manufacturers shed dealers under Chapter 11 bankruptcy or not?
The numbers are staggering. GM and Toyota both have 20% of the U.S. market but GM has about 7,000 dealers and Toyota has about 1500 dealers.
Even if GM were profitable can you imagine keeping track of 7,000 unruly children and the cost of making sure each one gets the latest memo?
What does it really matter to these congressional bozos? Take their “questions” in this ludicrous display of the last few days. Do any of the B&B honestly believe they were looking for specific answers to their “questions” on which loan guarantees would be predicated? If that were the case, they would have singled out Chrysler for aid (based on Nardelli’s correct answers concerning $1.00 compensation, etc.). The point is, the whole thing was an embarrassing charade where the only things that mattered were the cute and clever questions our esteemed representatives arrogantly “delivered.” I was waiting for one of them to exclaim “Hi Mom!” at any moment.
Mr. Mulally will be blowing the dust off of “The Way Forward” plan (with two weeks, he can punch it up with a light show and maybe some dancers).
Ricky Boy will probably just print out a copy of the “GM Fact or Fiction Website” (a great fictional work if you ask me) and hopes no one notices while he rides in heroically on a pre-production Volt a Hybrid Escalade towing a Volt mockup.
As for Demonic Bob, he’ll claim that a three-headed dog ate his plan while reminding everyone that he’s willing to work for the price of double cheese burger! (Thanks for the millions Home Depot!)
Maybe they can get Criswell to present PLAN TWO FROM THE LOWER PENINSULA.
Maybe ol’ Rick Wagoner can get a bunch of Tuckers lined up outside the window while the hearings are going on. Wait, did I say Tuckers ?…I meant Volts. ;)
They could all pile into an Expedition and carpool down to DC and let Shemp…oops… Ghettofinger drive…It’d be like Driving Miss Daisy…all the way to the poorhouse.
How about Bob Lutz giving them a ride in his West German military jet ?. Wagoner could sit in the 2nd seat, and the heads of Ford and Chrysler could be duct taped to the wings.
Picking up on the brilliant “term paper” theme, I’m picturing the scene from A Christmas Story when Ralphie gets his paper handed back to him. Only this time it will be Pelosi handing Ricky his paper with a big red “C” on it as she says, “You’ll shoot your eye out!”
Tell the Debt3 CEOs that congress want to see their business plans for the past 10 years, both yours and those who you have succeeded. Show the original documents with the dates (electronic copies with a date stamp would be better) and how they justified the fact they did not accomplish their goals. There will be a lot of finger pointing towards those who left the position (except Red Ink Rick), but give them until tomorrow morning to get everything together. They should be on file in their respective headquarters.