Well that didn’t take long. From stupid-ass dealer mark-ups to employee pricing discounts and/or zero percent financing in just over a year. Those fire-sale prices include the Dodge Challenger SRT8, despite the website’s fine print. In fact, the word on the street says you can get $4k off said top-of-the-line pavement smoker without much haggling. More if you’ve got a hard nose and cold cash (preferably financing, but beggars can be choosers these days). If you were waiting for the Challenger SRT8 to get some much-needed handling updates (e.g., a real limited slip diff), let it go. Saying that, who gives a NSFW about corners? I want me one of them 1000 NHRA Drag Race package Challengers, with added lightness, a shortened wheelbase and, uh, stuff. The livery’s not the worst I’ve ever seen. Okay, it is. But. I mean. Well. Anyway, it’s time for those TIWWRS (this is what we’ll really sell) six-cylinder Challengers to see if they can play Hertz. Only, the Challenger makes a lousy rental car with its challenged packaging and not-so-hot fuel economy. Oh, and the reason I’m blogging this now? A friend tried to sell me an immaculate a 10k mile Challenger SRT8 for $25 grand. Ouch. Quick aside. Is it me, or do all these guy vs. guy, middle-of-the-night drag race ads have a homosexual subtext?

Trying to eke out the best mileage whilst in a major city proves difficult. Trying to get the best mileage possible while on the Strip in Las Vegas proves downright impossible. No matter, as my car has Oklahoma plates and I’m in the biggest tourist destination in Nevada. So I consign myself to appear confused and lost as I trundle down to the Mandalay Bay for their awesome buffet.

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“While I have no statistical data to support my theory that Lexus drivers collectively exhibit the worst roadside manners in the U.S.,” The Detroit News‘ Scott Burgess writes, “I have plenty of anecdotal evidence: The Lexus driver on her cell phone in California who nearly ran me off the road in Westwood. The South Florida Lexus driver on his cell phone using the emergency lane to bypass traffic. Other Lexus drivers cutting me off, tailgating me or the never even seeing me. Somehow, Lexus can take a nice guy and transform him into Mad Max.” Whoa! Lexus? Mad Max?

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Automotive News [sub] reports that Ford has reduced its global warranty costs by a not inconsequential $1.2b during the past two years. My initial thought: fewer sales, fewer warranties to honor. But the per-vehicle warranty repair rate has dropped by 50 percent for U.S. Ford, Lincoln and Mercury vehicles since 2004. “Ford’s biggest quality gains have been on newly launched vehicles compared with the vehicles they replaced,” pronounceth Curt Yun, Ford’s director of global warranty. “The last 24 months have revealed some of our best quality results.” Yes, BUT while the results may have been revealed in the last two years, the headline numbers don’t strictly apply to cars built in the last two years. Ford made its largest reliability gains in the 2005 and (especially) the 2006 model years. Recently the rate of improvement has slowed: savings in 2008 only account for $100m of the $1.2b total. Why didn’t FoMoCo save more in ’08? This suggests that the low-hanging fruit has been picked. Of course, the factory warranty is only three years on Fords and four on Lincolns. How will these new models hold up after the warranty expires, as has recently been the case for the 2005s? 

[To view Ford’s performance in TrueDelta’s Car Reliability Survey, click here] 

My step-daughter Sasha and I had a little chin-wag this morning. After debating my potential car “needs” with her in private, it struck me that TTAC’s Best and Brightest might want to hear an 11-year-old’s perspective on high end automobiles. As egghead pistonheads, we often forget the basic appeal of our wheels, and how people outside the autoblogosphere view the apples of our collective eye. So I present my interview with Sash, and invite you to share your progeny’s thoughts about cars in general, your cars in particular and dream machines. [NB: I know the Estoque doesn’t have scissor doors. More’s the pity.]

Ford sits on the “Edge” of disaster. Despite the assurances from its CEO and chief cheerleader to the contrary, Alan Mulally knows that the day of reckoning could soon appear at his doorstep. Without an increase in sales volume, and soon, there will be no way to stop the cash burn. We’re not going to malign anything Mr. Mulally has done so far. In fact, he’s done more right than any other head honcho from Detroit in decades. But it’s time to pull out all the stops and break with tradition of never wishing ill on a competitor. It’s time for Chrysler to die.

GM’s luxury brand just can’t buy a break. Maybe I should rephrase that… [hat tip to Nick for the link]

The tipster writes:

Press and Landry spent three days going to their six business areas for dealer conferences. They said, “If all you dealers do not order your Feb and March allocation, Chrysler will liquidate.” How’s that for a pep talk sales pitch? Not only that, but they also said there’s a 50/50 chance they will liquidate even if we do order. So, according to Press and Landry, the only chance we have to save our dealership is to overload our stock. An Iowa dealer asked, “What if we can’t afford 40 new units because our bank won’t floor them?” Press answered, “Then we’ll liquidate.” So they are selling fear to their dealers. Go buy our shit NOW or you won’t have a dealership. The Fiat deal was just to be able to export Dodge trucks to Europe, that’s the nuts and bolts on that “merger of equals.” Chrysler’s suits also described the talks with GM: “We went on a date with Nissan, had sex, and they got some trucks we got some cars. Then it was 2AM, we were drunk and started talking romantically with our cousins at GM, we realized that our children would have crooked teeth.” God I love this business.

We are like fish swimming wide-eyed through an ocean of blood that no longer taste the horror in which we are suspended. On Dec. 19th, eight days after the automotive bailout bill failed in the senate, former President George W. Bush used his executive power to direct $13.4 billion to the automotive industry — $9.4 billion for General Motors and $4 billion for Chrysler. This is a measure only 36 percent of the country supported, according to a December CNN poll. The cost of this bailout will be tossed atop the $10.6 trillion U.S. debt, according to the treasury. This is a debt our generation will be forced to spend its lifetime repaying.

GM may be avoiding death with Uncle Sugar’s $13.4b (and counting) bridge loans to nowhere. But it’s not doing so well on the tax front. The Detroit News reports that GM’s been “quietly” lobbying Uncle Sam to drop a $7b tax bill. Without success. OK, folks, hang onto your green shades. “The tax liability stems from GM’s plan to reduce its $62 billion debt to $30 billion by offering bondholders equity in exchange for existing debt. GM also wants to use stock rather than cash to fund half of its contributions to a retiree health care fund to be managed by the UAW. But the debt swapped for equity could be considered income for tax purposes and GM’s ability to offset that income with prior-year losses, a common accounting practice, is sharply limited under a complex provision of the 1986 tax code that applies when a company changes ownership. The code was written to limit the ability of companies to buy other money-losing companies just to avoid paying taxes. GM plans to issue new stock to bondholders and the UAW and has already issued the government warrants, which may trigger a ‘technical ownership change,’ GM said in its memo.” And thus, a $7b tax bill. Now, let’s define chutzpah.

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The UAW has approved terms of a possible deal that would send GM’s Flint, MI, medium-duty commercial truck business to Isuzu. The deal, though not completed, would keep the assembly line’s UAW workforce building GMC TopKick and Chevrolet Kodiak trucks until 2014. UAW Local 598 Shop Chairman Mark Hawkins tells MLive that a GM-Isuzu deal would be best for workers considering GM’s financial struggles and its desire to shed the commercial truck business. “We got [sic] close to 500 people who work on that product line,” says Hawkins. “This keeps that work in Flint for the next six years.” GM had previously planned to sell the business to Navistar, which would have moved production to its Springfield, OH, plant. According to UAW officials, the Navistar deal fell through because GM no longer wanted to move ahead with production of a super-heavy-duty pickup product at Flint Truck. GM is currently “assessing various strategic options for the business” saying, “no decisions have been reached and there are no details to share at this time.” While UAW members are sweating out news about the future of their jobs, may I suggest they take a moment to reflect on how much worse things could be?