GM-volt.com‘s Lyle Dennis has pinged me with his story on the Chevrolet plug-in electric/gas hybrid Volt’s development timeline. So, we learn that . . .

Andrew Farah, the Volt’s lead engineer actually has a countdown clock in his office revealing that 63 days from today, assembly of the first true Volt will start.  All the parts will be lined up at the low volume assembly facility and will begin to come together that day. Andrew notes the first one will take longer to produce, but for all intents and purposes will come to life on June 1st. They will then be built at a rate of roughly 10 per week until a total fleet of over 80 is completed.

“All intents and purposes” is like “Not to insult you, but . . . ” In other words, wiggle room. Anyway, let’s follow this through.

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The pitchforks are out for bailout-funded Wall Street bonuses, and today’s NPR Morning Report highlights GM’s longstanding perk: free company cars with free gasoline. The Product Evaluation Program entitles 8000 white-collar employees to a new GM vehicle every six months. Drivers are to report problems back to the mother ship ASAP, and currently pay a $250/month administration fee. Current morale at the Tubes likely isn’t all that great, so any benefit is nice. However, it’s now at taxpayer expense, so what’s this fuss all about?

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A car can be an incredibly expensive, sophisticated, intricate, and downright scary thing to own. Changing oil? Are you nuts? Heck, before I got my license I couldn’t even tell you the difference between a Capri and a Caprice. There were far too many other things going on in my life that were far more important. College for one. Girls (or in my case, girl) for another. Money . . . well, unfortunately not so much. That’s why I now tend to be very forgiving when it comes to teaching others about cars. Speaking of which . . .

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The FT has some valuable perspective on Chrysler owners, Cerberus, the private equity firm that accepted multiple billions in taxpayer “loans” yet refuses to list the automaker’s backers. Hey, does owner Steven Feinberg hold any paper personally? Anyway, Mr. F is nonplussed by the fact that Chrysler is now on federally-funded life support begging for more. “We always try to hang in—but not at the expense of being commercial. As far as GMAC and Chrysler are concerned, we will hang in there as long as it takes. There is the feeling of a greater calling.” When did running a once-proud American company into the ground become a sacred ceremony? Anyway, there’s only so much spiritual elevation an investor can take. Know what I mean? No? Make the jump.

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The dilemma: should the MSM and autoblogosphere highlight the fact that FoMoCo CEO Alan Mulally earned $13.6 million in 2008, a year where the automaker’s sales cratered and their profits evaporated, or should they focus on the fact that the number represents a 37 percent cut from his previous take-home? The Detroit News headline splits the difference: “Mulally’s pay cut; still gets $13.6M.” Maybe someone should point out that Big Al’s compensation was front-loaded; he banked $28.2M in the first four months of his employ. OK, now, Mulally’s 2008 pay and financial future isn’t quite as . . . bounteous these days.

Most of that — $8.7 million — represents stock options that are worthless at the current share price. The automaker said Mulally has yet to receive any stock options that he could cash. Ford said it will reduce Mulally’s salary by another 30 percent for 2009 and 2010, and eliminate merit pay increases and bonuses for U.S. salaried workers because of the challenges facing the company and the auto industry.

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There’s only one thing worse than realizing you’re a cynical bastard: realizing you’re a cynical bastard and the world really IS that corrupt. Oh well. The truth hurts, both giving and receiving. In this case, I had high hopes for the Tata Nano. As the son of a Romanian immigrant for whom car ownership was proof positive that America is the world’s greatest country, I believe that the motorization of the world’s largest democracy would unleash that nation’s creativity, productivity and prosperity. But when Tata “launched” the Nano two days ago, without a factory to produce it, I smelled a rat[tan]. The next day, there it was: Tata’s in not-so “secret negotiations” for a billion dollar UK bailout for their ill-advised—not to say hubristic—purchase of Jaguar and Land Rover. So, there’s your timing then. Oh, and the announcement on Autobloggreen this morning that the NSFA (Not Safe For America) Tata will export the micro-car to America (with a few mods, ’natch) in 2011 or 2012 (or 2020) is not to be taken seriously. The argument that Tata’s pie-in-the-sky promise to do the same for Europe actually weakens the case, not strengthens it. Or maybe that’s just me being cynical again. One can only hope.

boredlawstudent writes:

OK best and Brightest, I really need your help! My car was totaled last week by a DUI driver and I’m in need of a car. I’m trying to decide which car to buy. A NEW Altima Coupe or a 2007-2008 CPO [Certified Pre-Owned] G35. My top concerns are reliability and material quality (and comfort). I’ve see a number of 2007 CPO G35’s with low miles (17K) on dealer sites requesting $24-26K. I’ve seen some 2008 CPO’s for $25K, but they seem to be off rental which I obviously don’t want. Some questions…

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Cars.about.com‘s Aaron Gold is what I’d call a pushover. So Chevrolet pushed him over. 

I know a lot of people are going to fall in love with the Camaro, and I’m glad — this is a gorgeous car, and I can’t wait to see it on the road and listen to it go by. I’d even like to try a second date, if Chevrolet will let me borrow another one (not that they’re likely to after reading this review). But a long-term love connection with me and the Camaro? I’m afraid it ain’t gonna happen. So much for getting everything you want. — Aaron Gold

UPDATE: Chevy’s response:

“You’re right, you definitely won’t be getting a ‘second date’ with the Camaro.”

Rumors have simmering for some time now that say Porsche is considering extending its once-focused brand downmarket. Again. And though the Roxster rumors prompted a repudiation of volume-chasing from Zuffenhausen, word is filtering in from the German auto press that Porsche might be considering a neo-914 project with VW. Or, as the starry-eyed fools at Motor Authority put it, “work on the next-generation Boxster and what has been thought of as a 914 revival may be a sort of cover for the even more secret work on the 356’s modern spiritual successor.” What they mean (I think) is that the new baby Porsche could be a rebadged VW, true to tradition. The Bluesport Concept, in this case. Of course that means cannibal trouble for the proposed Audi version, but that was coming anyway (VW “needs” to share the platform with “at least” three brands). Meanwhile, CAFE doesn’t just loom for Porsche, they’ve been fined every year since 1991. Oh yeah, and the lovable Boxster has loaded over $6K onto its base MSRP since its 1997 debut. So I’ll break with site tradition and say Porsche should keep stretching that brand. Let’s face it: the Bluesport ain’t coming stateside as a VW, so we can’t expect a true “performance bargain” out of the Bluesport platform. A sub-$40K Porsche? That might be worth dreaming of.

What makes a car a true classic? Being one of the handsomest and most enduring designs of its time? Staying in production for twenty years? Having a long-stroke in-line engine with a classic OHC hemi-head? Winning a big race at the ‘Ring? Having illustrious heads of state as loyal owners? Or just slapping a chrome “Classic” badge on its flanks? How does this Rambler stack up? Has it earned its chops, or is it an imposter?

In 1979, Chrysler was staring down the barrel of bankruptcy. ChryCo’s charismatic CEO stepped forward, publicly lobbying for $1.5b worth of federal loan guarantees. Lee Iacocca captured the American taxpayer’s respect and trust– to the point where the automaker’s ad folk made Lee the company’s pitchman. “If you can find a better car, buy it!” he dared. They did and they didn’t. Either way, Iacocca’s communication skills were beyond reproach. Contrast that with today’s mumbling, bumbling Motown CEOs, who’ve managed to alienate well over half of the American public, who no longer want to buy Detroit’s cars OR provide them with a second (third) chance. And no wonder. The CEOs have demonstrated an abject inability to call a spade a spade, or sell the spadework that must be done (which is largely grave digging by now). Wagoner, Nardelli and Mulally’s failure is what it is. But what about the little guy in all this? Who speaks for them?

Results from the IIHS’ latest small SUV roof crush test are making the rounds of the autoblogosphere, and as usual the spoonfed information is being dutifully regurgitated in the name of consumer safety. What goes largely unreported is the fact that the IIHS is gleefully moving the roof crush goalposts, a unilateral decision with little benefit to consumers and a host of unanticipated consequences. Current roof crush standards mandate that vehicle roofs must support 1.5 times the weight of the vehicle, and have been in effect since 1973. The IIHS has been campaigning for years to increase government roof strength standards, and an uprated standard of 2.5 strength-to-weight ratio is currently being considered by the NHTSA. So where does the 2.5 standard rate with the IIHS? “Marginal” is the score that the IIHS gives to vehicles meeting this not-yet approved standard. Huh?

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President Obama wasn’t indulging in hyperbole last Sunday when he told 60 Minutes that “the only thing less popular than putting money into banks is putting money into the auto industry.” The Freep reports that a new Polk survey shows that 61 percent of Americans now oppose giving GM and Chrysler more money. More tellingly, support for a continued bailout of the auto industry peaks at only 16 percent in the manufacturing-heavy Great Lakes region and drops to as low as 4 percent in favor in New England. And there’s little room to argue that lack of support is based on ignorance or misperception. About the same percentage of people who opposed more loans also recognized that denying them would have dire economic consequences. One Polk analyst describes the emerging consensus on Detroit’s predicament as “it’s a problem, but it’s not a problem for taxpayers.” Cold.

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TTAC spoke and Nissan listened. Or something like that. In any case, Pistonheads reports that the Japanese automaker has heard complaints that their 911-slayer is harder riding than a tea tray down a gravel ski trail. Nissan will offer a more comfortable version of their GT-R. “The GT-R Spec-V firm suspension will get replaced by a softer, more refined setup and will include ripple control shock absorbers to help iron out the bumps. There’ll also be a wider choice of interior trims to help entice a more upmarket clientele, with aluminium and wood grain finishes both options on the new Spec-M.” So the scream “OH, NO! GODZILLA!” will now become “I say, isn’t that the Japanese sports car that lapped the Nurburgring rather quickly?”