Roast chicken, roast lamb, roast pork, roast beef, roast….Lutz? That’s right. The car world’s most favorite big mouth is going to get it shut, at least for an evening. Bob Lutz is being roasted in the name of the arthritis foundation of the United States. Maximum Bob is going to check his ego in at the door and have people shout barbed comments at him and all he can do is smile (a bit like when our own “Bob” Farago met him). In the past, comedy roasts have produced some great comments, my favorite being when Lisa Lampanelli said that Danny Bonaduce was the the only person in room who was in a good band (Gene Simmons was the guest of honor). Some comments have been very, very great but we couldn’t possibly print them on TTAC! So the question of the day is this: If you had to write one joke for Bob Lutz’ roast, what would it be? Here’s my entry: “It’s nice to see Bob Lutz and arthritis coming together. Normally, when Bob Lutz and cars come together, all the driver gets is rigor mortis!”. Thank you! I’ll be here all week!
[Ed: Roasters are said to include Fritz Henderson, Ed Wellburn, Jean Jennings, Brian Nesbitt and Brent DeWar… Jason Vines will be the MC. When asked if a certain Robert Farago could contribute, either in person or in a video appearance, organizer Michelle Glazier said “We’re more or less selling things, not slamming things.” Pity.]
No Farago? Understandable. I assume, like most roasts, that this is supposed to be good natured fun. Somehow, I think Robert would take it too seriously.
No sense in ruining everybody else’s evening.
to get on the soapbox…..one big flaw w/the current state of affairs is that American executives have no sense of shame (and in the the case of the automakers include the union bosses).
Only behind Wall Street and the dotcom implosion, Lutz & Co. were stewards of the biggest destruction of market value and jobs in history. But don’t worry, I’m assuming that Lutz’s golf game hasn’t been affected.
Saturn Astra, Pontiac GTO, Merkur….there is a joke in there somewhere.
All US taxpayers now own part of every new GM vehicle — we just don’t get to drive them (which is not a bad thing).
Twotone
in a 2004 chevy malibu he proclaimed to be a great car
Spit-roasted.
The only Volts that Bob Lutz cares about are from his pacemaker.
Bob know how to build a great car. That didn’t do him any good at GM, but he knows.
Bob tried to talk the government into building a Camaro convertible… but when he said “chop top”, they thought he meant executive jobs.
Bob was hired to put better interiors into GM cars. He succeeded – ask any salesman who’s slept away an afternoon in one that’s sitting on the lot.
Paging Dr.Lechtor… Paging Dr.Lechtor.
“Has it been longer than 60 days? I’d like to return Bob to Chrysler.”
“Wait, Bob still works here? I was sure Obama showed him the door right after Rick! Does someone have Alan Mullaly’s phone number?”
“Perception Gap: Two words that describe Bob’s belief that GM vehicles are competitive.”
“Bob Lutz, your tax dollars are flushing down his toilet.”
“Bob is like an HHR, sort of flashy, but basically useless.”
Like I would any other turkey…butter, oil, salt and pepper.
Bob has had a great career. He has gone from BMW to Ford, then to Chrysler, then to GM. Is somebody playing hot potato here?
And if they are, does anyone else see a progression in the quality of the company? I can think of a lot of car companies hoping that GM stays around long enough for Bob to work until he retires.
The way this game has been going, I would hate to be the company that gets him next if GM can summon the strength to toss the potato one more time. After all, the government used up all its money on GM, so there is none left for the next one who loses the Lutz game.
But if Lutz stays, GM is wondering if it can get some money back by entering him on TV as the Biggest Loser.
Got a million of em.
The local Chevy dealership called…they accepted your jets on trade. Your 2010 Aveo is waiting for you outside.
Will there be a going away roast for the beloved Robert?
Using all the money he looted from the companies while sinking them into the ground.
Ah Bob Lutz, who was responsible for wonderful cars like the GTO, G8, and Solstice. All wonder cars…
FOR ME TO POOP ON!
Lutz. Rhymes with putz.
beautiful, ’cause Lutz can kiss my As…
“May The Best Car Win” is Lutz’s idea of an ad campaign for GM. I don’t even have to make a joke.
Isnt he the guy who said “Global Warming is a crock of shit and Hybrids dont make any sense” ?
Or was it:
” GM is a crock of shit and Chryslers dont make any sense”
Or was it:
“European Fords are a crock of shit and Opel doesnt make any sense.”
Or was it:
“BMW’s are a crock of shit and Cunningham doesnt make any sense”
His view of the world never changes, just the names.
Oh. Let’s have some fun and roast Bob.
These guys are clueless as to what is going on around them.
They should STFU and get to work.
Or maybe they see the hand writing on the wall that we do and are going milk it for all it’s worth.
What is it?
Rome burns why some guy plays a fiddle?
I just don’t understand it all.
Hey? Lets build an electric car that will sell for $40 THOUSAND DOLLARS.
They are toast and they know it.
Love the “kiss my Astra” photo.
white men cant lead
How about on a spit over a pile of the cheapest Lithium ion batteries money can buy.
American executives have no sense of shame
Understatement of the decade.
Saturn Astra, Pontiac GTO, Merkur….there is a joke in there somewhere.
Yes, the Merkur. I know of what I speak; my mother-in-law had one.
Klutz or Putz, the man who shut down Pontiac, Saturn, Oldsmobile and Hummer in record time.
Anyone who has posted a comment on here ever had a charitable organization request that you allow them to roast you in an effort to raise big buck$ for their charitable organization? I would imagine the answer for the vast majority is no you haven’t. Bob’s a good sport. No matter what you have to say about him, good bad or otherwise, he has been sought after by numerous manufactures for his expertise. Products he has brought from concept to completion stand out and we have him to thank for that. He’s taken things up a notch or two no matter where he’s gone – love the products or hate them. He captivates the media. GM has been lucky to have him. Everyone knows he doesn’t need the job. He could be spending his time doing plenty of other things besides going to work daily. He owns and flies a fighter jet. He has a helicopter and valid racing licenses across the globe. We’ll see if the Best Car Wins in more ways than one. How about on the race track later this month? You may or may not now he’s challenged the world to “Bring it on” against him and the CTS-V. What the guy has accomplished should be acknowledged. What he does daily both personally and professionally continues to leave others guys his half his age eating his dust. Knock Bob if you want, but most of what people say about Bob is because they don’t know enough to say what they are blabbing about. If he were to read most of the posts, he’d probably laugh and say, “These are a Crock!”
Are his disastrous results at GM a crock too or is that just another one of those pesky little perception gaps?
Jeez, what planet are you on anyway? I don’t at all dismiss Lutz participating in a charity roast but your adulation of his alleged accomplishments is beyond fiction. GM is so lucky to have him they went through bankruptcy during his extended product czar tenure in case that bit of news may have escaped your attention.
Not sure how I would roast Lutz.
I know its fun on these blogs to rip people but just think where GM would be if Lutz didn’t join GM earlier this decade. He is a true car guy, and generally has a good sense of the market. Lutz’s hire was probably the only good decision by that hack Rick Wagoner.
Say what you will about his bluster and the overall effectiveness of his tenure, Lutz has brought out some of the best cars in GM’s history.
Would some of those best cars in GM’s history be the SSR, GTO, Solstice/Sky and G8? None of which GM could make a profit on? Notice a pattern? It doesn’t matter how good the product is if the company can’t make a profit selling it. Lutz tenure as GM’s car czar did nothing but shove them into BK faster (if that were possible, quite an achievement in and of itself actually).
If Lutz were the least bit competent in his position he would have realized and acted on the fact that high volume profitable cars were the lynchpin necessary for success and provided them. Instead he provided niche market unprofitable vehicles. On both counts he was instrumental in quickening GM’s demise.
Lutz performance (or utter lack thereof) is very well documented, to champion his performance at GM is pure ignorance of the facts. Lutz is a complete failure and I guarantee you automotive history will record it as such.
Hmmm
TwoTone:
I think the problem is..
Besides us owning GM cars..
I / we just dont want to drive them.
As for roasting Lutz..
Id like to stick a apple in his mouth and some gefilte fish in his ass, and roast him over a pile of Suburbans / Tahoes.
And see.. the worst part about him..
Is that he’s over at GM. When he was at Chrysler.. I actually had respect for him, Iacocca and Bob Gale.
———–
mtymsi:
I agree with you totally and absolutely.
For all the big mouth things he’s said.. he hasn’t produced vehicles that lasted WORTH A SHIT.
But maybe that’s how he got his big salary. Maybe its some kind of condition that allows ya to be a Wagoneer protege —
(word play, shame they couldn’t build / market a competitor..)