I used a 15-year-old Ranger to pick up some AMG wheels this evening. The ride was . . . pleasant. Light jazz on the radio. Engine and stick shift in good working order. Intermittent wipers and ABS for the rain. Alloy wheels for show. Did I mention this thing is 15 years old? Anyhow, my mind wandered into the world of ‘what if’s’. What if someone decides to buy this truck and keep it for another 7 to 10 years? It has only 150k and the prior owner took good mechanical care of it. Paint’s cheap. Parts are even cheaper. So…

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It’s not that GM’s Korean Daewoo division doesn’t need more money. The problem is that the only bank willing to lend a dime, the Korean Development Bank, wants strings attached. Since GM came up with the cash to buy up Daewoo’s $413m rights offering, it says Daewoo is out of trouble for two more years. Or 18 months… depending on that troublesome global car market. Meanwhile, GM-Daewoo’s $5b worth of forward contracts will burn up $300m in cash every month, as the debt matures. Although KDB and GM-Daewoo’s other lenders refuse to roll any of that debt forward and have been firm about enacting safeguards before loaning the automaker more money, GM’s Nick Reilly says Daewoo can now negotiate from a position of relative strength. Emphasis on relative.

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I was most gratified when the MSM adopted my nickname for then-GM Car Czar Bob Lutz, recognizing the crock of shit guy as Maximum Bob. (While they missed the irony, that only made it more delicious.) I’m now pleased to report (for my own selfish, ego-maniacal reasons) that the term “zombie”—as applied to Uncle Sam’s nationalized automaker and other bailout queens—may about to leave the TTAC orphanage for the big, wide world. Its champion: Senator Bob Corker of Tennessee. You may remember Corker as the only politician who pissed into Motown’s begging bowl, publicly grilling the Big Three’s CEOs when they jetted in to D.C. for a taste. (Thank you George Bush.) Here’s Corker’s press release on the Obama administration’s unspecified “request” for the next round of bailout bucks for GMAC. “Continuing life support to an institution like GMAC is a major mistake,” said Corker. “It creates enormous risk to taxpayers, is an inappropriate use of government subsidies to support jobs in a specific sector of the economy, and continually breathes new life into a zombie institution that should be seized and resolved. At what point are we going to stop propping up zombie institutions to support industrial policy through our banking system?” And here comes the right hook. . .

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As Redflex Traffic Systems fights a shareholder revolt at home in Australia, the speed camera vendor is simultaneously battling a public revolt against photo ticketing in two Ohio cities. Next Tuesday residents of Chillicothe and Heath will have the opportunity to vote on citizen-led initiatives that would ban the use of red light cameras and speed cameras. Redflex has poured substantial cash into an advertising blitz covering both towns. “Vote NO on Issue 5 and keep Heath safe,” read a Redflex brochure sent to Heath voters this week. “In the last four months alone, at enforced intersections in Heath… red light running has reduced by almost half… 90 percent of speeders are not Heath residents.”

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“We’re likely to have to put in less capital [to GMAC] than we expected,” U.S. Treasury Secretary Tim Geithner told the House of Representatives Financial Services Committee earlier today. Which raises six major questions. First, huh? GMAC has already received not one but two direct injections of federal taxpayer assistance. Why are we arguing over amounts rather than the question of whether or not we should draw a line under the fetid financier and call it quits? Second, when did Geithner’s mob/GMAC figure out that $12.5 billion wouldn’t be enough to keep the lame-ass lender afloat? Third, why hasn’t anyone been called on to the carpet (i.e. shit-canned) for underestimating the federal teat provision needed to prop-up these sub-prime pricks? Fourth, how much taxpayer money did U.S. Treasury Secretary think GMAC would need to stay afloat—you know; before he figured out that the meshugganah money men didn’t need quite so much? Fifth, how much new capital does GMAC need anyway? And sixth, why should we believe we will ever get this money back? Which brings us back to d’oh. “The only thing we’re doing is making sure we follow through on that commitment,” Geithner testified. Or, as the Brits would say, in for a penny, what’s yours is mine.

We’re on pins and needles here, waiting for part two, in which the beautiful Charlene (best pronounced Flight of The Concords style) enters into Gary’s office and emerges with a new car; I’m betting. Can you believe this thing had zero views when I found it? I’m also betting that will change. Sexist bastards.

There’s an excuse for everything, and if a UC Irvine study published in Cerebral Cortex [via CNN] is to be believed, genetics might just be the reason some people can’t drive for squat. A protein called brain-derived neurotrophic factor (BDNF) is typically secreted while performing a given task (in this case, driving), helping facilitate communication among brain cells and helps retain memory. But the study has identified a gene variant which causes individuals to secrete less BDNF, hindering learning and improvement at task performance. The UC Irvine team, led by Professor Steve Cramer, recruited 29 subjects to drive 15 laps of a twisty simulated driving course, measuring how well they learned to improve their performance. The seven subjects with the identified gene variant performed 30 percent worse. “These people make more errors from the get-go, and they forget more of what they learned after time away,” says Cramer, who estimates that 30 percent of Americans have the BDNF-inhibiting gene variant. “I’d be curious to know the genetics of people who get into car crashes.” There’s currently no commercially-available test, so bad drivers can’t definitively blame their genetics just yet. But they can still take lessons, hang up the cell phone, or chant the mantra “my car is a deadly weapon” whenever they get behind the wheel. Regardless of your genetic predilections, once you pass a driver’s test, the safety of other motorists is your responsibility.

Well, the “what makes an American car American” debate just got a little more interesting (and a lot more interesting than the “who ‘won’ the CTS-V Challenge” rigmarole). Automotive News [sub] reports that Ford’s Oakville, Ontario plant and GM’s Delta Township plant have ceased production of Flex, Edge, MKX, MKT, Acadia, Traverse and Enclave as supplier Rico Automotive is unable to supply key transmission components. The reason for the parts stoppage: labor violence… in India. Turmoil at Rico’s plant in Gurgaron (30 miles from New Delhi) came to a head on the 18th, when clashes between temporary workers and factory staff left an employee dead. Now GM stands to lose 7,200 units of production, while Ford admits “several thousand” units won’t be built over the next week. This striking illustration of how globalized the auto industry is, is causing some analysts to question the wisdom of using Indian suppliers. They argue that labor unrest like this is common in the subcontinent, compounding already-challenging logistical and shipping-cost issues. But GM and Ford aren’t exactly about to stop investing in Indian firms and production capacity either, since that market shows more growth potential than the US. One thing is for sure: there’s no such thing as an “American car,” let alone an “American car company” anymore. Government ownership notwithstanding.

I haven’t done this in 30 years. Young whipper-snappers showed me a thing or two. Let’s see them do this when they’re 77

Maximum Bob Lutz concedes defeat to TTAC’s Jack Baruth with dignity and a little feistyness. Cadillac is estimating Lutz will finish “in the top five or six.”

Via Cadillac’s Twitter Feed:

John Heinricy (Cadillac test driver)- Cadillac CTS-V: Top Lap: 2:46:560

Aaron Link (Cadillac development engineer)- Cadillac CTS-V: Top Lap: 2:48:902

Brian Redman- CTS-V: Top Lap: 2:49:596

Michael Cooper (Who is this guy?)- BMW M3: Top Lap: 2:50:424

Jack Baruth- Cadillac CTS-V (TTAC): Top Lap: 2:51:153

Lawrence Ulrich- CTS-V (New York Times): Top Lap: 2:53:157

Bob Lutz- Cadillac CTS-V (VP of Marketing, GM): Top Lap: 2:56:321

Michael Mainwald (carguydad.com)- BMW M5: Top Lap: 3:05:398

Wes Siler- Mitsubishi Evo X (Jalopnik): Top Lap: 3:08:126

Chris Fairman- CTS-V: Top Lap: 3:14:292

Archan Basu- Jaguar XF: Top Lap: 3:15:670

Tom Loder- Audi RS4: Top Lap:  3:15:702

It’s official: TTAC’s top driver has beaten Bob Lutz! Check back tomorrow for Jack’s on-the-ground take on the weirdness that was.

The Detroit News reports that GM is delaying the launch of the Chevrolet Cruze. The nationalized automaker’s next big—I mean small thing will now hit U.S. showrooms in the third quarter of 2010. In theory. GM’s explanation for the delayed denouement: it wants to ensure “a flawless launch.” Given GM’s on-again, of-again product planning chaos, and their failure to get enough Buick LaCrosses on the ground, you’ve got to wonder why they would set themselves up for failure with talk of perfection. Oh right; the automotive media has the memory of a goldfish. Meanwhile, the company’s camp followers can take heart in New GM’s new determination to get things right—while those of us who’ve heard it all before sigh, shake our heads and say “Flawless. Yeah right.” No matter how you slice it, the Cruze’s failure to set sail by the advertising for-sale date isn’t news to gladden investors’ hearts. After all, the ur-Cruze (the Korean Lacetti) debuted on October 30, 2008. The EU-Cruze has been plying European roadways since February. The delay means the Cruze will not arrive before GM’s kinda maybe sorta I know we said we would but tempus fugit mid-2010 IPO. Between now and then, stand back! GM’s predicting a sales spurt!

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In the same week BMW revealed a one-off, 580 hp, 100+ lbs lighter “M5 CSL we never built” (in the words of the M division’s head of development, Albert Biermann), BMW USA’s VP had this to say about his firm’s absence from Cadillac’s CTS-V Challenge:

We have no fear of comparisons by objective bodies, but it’s different if the person doing the comparison has a dog in the hunt

Not that the point lacks validity, but would BMW’s tune be different if the M5 CSL were a production model? We’d like to think so.

The WSJ reports that GM will draw “north of $2.5b” from its government escrow account to fund its own bailout of its major supplier, Delphi. Considering GM has committed $1b in debt assumption, $2b in forgiven claims and $1.75b in investments, we can assume the amount will be well north of $2.5b. But how much is left in that escrow account anyway? Estimates at the time of GM’s exit from bankruptcy were that some $20b was left to draw upon. And we’ll know exactly how much is left when GM discloses its government-money expenditures to the SEC by the end of this week. GM sources claim the money has not been used to cover operating shortfalls, and CEO Fritz Henderson has even gone on the record to say GM will not need further government assistance. Considering GM’s cash burn over the last four years was in the $10b/year range, let’s hope that claim isn’t entirely based on the assumption that a planned IPO next summer will be a rousing success.

The car business literally ceased the day World Trade Center I and II fell back to the Earth. And so the savvy suits at GM created a landmark campaign “Keep America Rolling.” Generous Motors offered 0% interest for 60 months on EVERYTHING they made. Customers had to forfeit their rebates in exchange for 0% interest loans, but my god did it work. The sales rates were staggering.  I personally witnessed customers at a Texas Chevy house literally fighting to be next in line to sign papers. The rumor had gotten out that 0% was going to end suddenly; the customers in this particular store believed they were in a race to sign docs before the last 0% credit was used up. That was 2001. Today eight years later, zero percent is BACK on.

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