Seventy-four dollars and eighty-four cents for seventy-two hours and unlimited mileage. I paid the man, took the escalator, and walked to the “Mid-Size” sign. Choose any car, they’d told me, and I had nine sad, deeply tired choices before me. Dirty and dented, scattered across the concrete tier. Welcome to Dollar Rent-A-Car.
The rental fleets are aging, and it’s no mystery why. Fewer than fifty-four of the dollars I turned over to Dollar actually stayed in their hands; the rest went to a staggering variety of user fees and local taxes. If they could rent their mid-sizers every day without interruption, there would be five hundred and twenty-five dollars available in a month. Simply financing a brand-new Sonata, Fusion, or Optima over five years is a $450/month proposition, and we all know that anybody who does such a thing is “in the bucket” for years.
I walked up and down the line of cars, checking odometers and feeling for tread depth. I had eleven hundred miles to cover, much of it in conditions where snow would be more of a probability than a possibility. A burgundy Sonata offered 48,200 miles and tire grooves that were mere suggestions. Next to it, a silver Optima promised plenty of grip on the outside shoulder but the smooth rubber near the inside told a tale of indifferent alignment.
Sonata, Optima, Sonata, Optima… Avenger? Forty-seven K and shadows of tread pattern. The Somali expatriate working Dollar’s exit gate started to wander semi-purposefully in my direction. The crazy white man in the camel-hair coat was getting in and out of all the cars, kneeling next to them. It couldn’t mean anything good.
Last car in line was a white Sonata. A newish set of mismatched sixteen-inch all-seasons. Combat damage to all quarters, torn patches on the door panels. The hood had a dent/ding/scratch pattern that spoke of vandalism, monstrous hail, or perhaps a mountain lion with a propensity for sharpening its claws on steel. I briefly imagined a terrified renter cowering in the driver’s seat as the big cat growled. My mental image of the growling mountain lion, I realized, was taken directly from an early-Nineties Mercury ad.
Mercury is dead. Hyundai lives. Turn the key. Thirty-something thousand miles. The ESC light came on and stayed on. Not a problem. I will trade tire depth for some indifferently-programmed electronic nanny. A nice surprise: XM Radio is activated and working. Fire up “The Groove”. I’m loaded and backing up just as the gate attendant reaches me; he jogs after like a neighborhood dog doing the bare minimum of intimidation. When he catches up, I hand him a carbon-paper damage diagram that resembles the Rosetta Stone and he sighs deeply.
“Car scratch and dent bad, man, but okay, right?”
“Okay,” I reply. It’s a failing of mine to assign souls to automobiles, the same way my son isn’t quite sure whether his Kota is really alive. I think of my Porsche 911, sleeping peacefully through the winters and joyfully growling across the Hocking Hills in the summers. My Plymouth Neon is a fierce competitor, longing for the clash of fenders and the bravada of the late pass. Even the new arrival at the house, my Town Car, seems satisfied as we quietly roll through the forty-two-mile morning commute.
Pope John Paul II said, “Also the animals possess a soul. Men must love and feel solidarity with our smaller brethren.” He was silent on the matter of automobiles. In truth, the soul they have is the soul we give them. Model T, E-Type Jag, Hyundai Sonata. All metal and nothing more. Returning this car would not be like adopting an abused animal and then returning it to the shelter. I repeated that sentence again and again in my head. After a while, I almost believed it.
Thanks to Jessica Janson [link NSFW] for the title of this article, and much love to the working girls everywhere, past and present, particularly the one who will never read this…
it looks pretty soulless. good job on the article, though
Jack, how’d it smell? Did it have ants?
Two of my more horrific rental car experiences had interesting answers to those questions.
I hope you beat the hell out of it, after all, It’s a Rental, Baby.
$74 for 1,100 miles? That’s 6.7 cents per mile; much cheaper than owning a car. For that price one shouldn’t complain at all.
I got a fantastic car price from HotWire for around $13 a day.
The counter gal sold me on ANY mid-sized for a few dollars more and I took it.
Go and pick out your own from those available.
Well, all that was there upon stepping off the bus was 1 VW Bug and 5 HHR.
Having driven the rental HHR…and disliked it…I chose the bug.
Folks, I can’t remember when I wanted to kill a car.
This is a first.
It bogged.
It suddenly surged.
Then, when I touched the brakes, it froze the wheels to a stop!
I lurched forward at every slight touch.
So I was forever lurching and lunging up and down Federal Hwy all week.
On the drive up to Orlando, I wondered why anybody would buy a convertible…there was so much wind noise coming through the seals it’s as if all the windows were open.
A really stupid car.
Once it made sense when the engine was in the rear, now its just nostalgia.
Did it have a sunroof? One time in Pittsburg I ended up getting a bug as a rental and it had a sunroof. I tried to open it but the wind buffering was painful. It was very poorly designed. The wind diffuser didn’t do it’s job right so there was an ear pounding booming sound that was very painful. This was one of the first years the new bug came out so I’m assuming it’s been fixed since then. But talk about bad first impressions. My sister-in-law has a turbo, and man has that thing been a money pit, but she won’t get rid of it for the life of her. I’d imagine she might think different if it had a sunroof.
I thought the “new” bug was based on the Golf and is front-engined and front-drive.
Kercif — sometimes the later models fix these things and sometimes they go the other way.
My 1993 Accord 4 door had a wonderful sunroof with a sprung pop-up wind deflector. My 2000 Accord coupe (damn it’s glass transmission to hell) did not have any sort of wind deflector. It had HOLES where the pop up deflector might have mounted, but nothing installed and nothing available. There was an available fixed smoked plexi deflector, which covered the front couple of inches of the sunroof. Due to the coupe’s chopped roofline, the sunroof only opened just past halfway. So fixed deflector + coupe = maybe 1 inch of sky, so no fixed deflector for me. And without a deflector you get the ear pounding booming noise at anything over about 25 mph.
My wife and I rented a car from Budget for my business trip to Chicago last week. We wound up with a dark blue Sonata. XM was activated, too. Are all newer cars like this? I read all the complaints on this site and in some mags about interiors and “hard plastics” and this car was no exception. Yeah, the dash was padded of a sort, but the door panels were solid. I mentioned the “touch points” test to my wife and she agreed with me – there were too few, but she drives a CR-V, so, nothing unique there, either. The car was reasonably comfortable, but the “gun slit” windows gave me pause and I had to use extra caution when changing lanes and everything else except straight-ahead driving. Still, almost got slammed by an SUV on Randolph Street making our way to I-55 ’cause I didn’t see it!
My take on the car is that it was all right, but I’d never consider this car for my own – I’m a die-hard Chevy fan of the old-school – yeah, I know this is 2010, thank you very much! I just haven’t warmed up to Hyundai, yet, but most likely some form of it may appear in my future, but for now, I’ll sample as many cars as I can from the rental counter while hanging on to my beloved (until something goes terribly wrong) 2004 Impala.
BTW, XM radio stinks. I happen to like jazz/standards and their excuse was a poor imitation of the internet station I listen to daily (http://www.martiniinthemorning,com). That’s my off-topic editorial comment for the day, I promise!
Jack, you mentioned the tire issue – our Sonata had the “low tire pressure” light on the entire trip even tho’ the pressure in all four was O.K. Maybe they monitor the spare, too, and it was low or non-existant? I didn’t bother to check.
Oh, and yes, our car had some “battle scars” as well, as did our Fusion in Napa Valley last year, and a few rentals in years previous, so the circumstances you mentioned have been going on for three years, at least, in my recent experiences.
One final note: The people I dealt with at the rental agency were not born in this country, either. I believe she was from Pakistan, I don’t have an issue with that – just a matter of time, but when it is difficult to understand them and when they must deal with the public at large, one must exercise a lot of patience and not be in a great hurry!
Nice article, but kinda short.
My rental of a 2004 Elantra was my first clue that my 1998 Saturn SC1 was actually a POS.
I can imagine the conversation in which you and Jessica Janson got the title article
Wife and I went to visit the (American) relatives for a week and we rented a compat (that is what we are used to & drive) and I think we put between 2300-2400 miles on it in 7 days for a grand total of $315? $320? out the door. Can’t drive my STI for $0.07/mile and not sure I’d trust an 11 year old 3 speed auto (wifes car) in mountains, even if they are dry…
It got us to where we needed to go and did it’s job. Yay for cheap rentals!
I do rentals once or twice a year for the annual trip(s) to Bangor, ME to visit the mother-in-law. Been doing all my rentals through Enterprise on West Broad in Richmond. Have had: 09 Sonata – absolutely loved the car, Pontiac Grand Prix – really nice at high speed on I-95, old Chevy Malibu – rental mediocrity, Chrysler Pacifica – yeech, Toyota Corolla – four wheeled Wonder Bread.
Then I hit Avis for the latest trip, because I needed a one-way rental (Penske box van for the return). Got a Mercury Grand Marquis, easily the most grossly overrated piece of shit in the history of autodom. You Panther guys have no idea what you’re talking about, or you haven’t driven anything else in the last twenty years.
Oh yeah, the famous Avis “we try harder”? As dead as Mr. Goodwrench. After the friendly professionalism of Enterprise, I ran into private business’ version of civil service indifference.
I’m w/ you on the Enterprise folks. Thumbs up.
Several years ago I rented a Hyundai Elantra from one of the big rental agencies. Once in the car, I could tell it had led a dismal life. It made various grinding and whirring noises, pulled hard to the right upon braking and looked like there had been a dust storm on the inside. This was my first exposure to that particular version of Elantra, and I wondered just what an owner driven model was like. Later on, I drove an acquaintance’s Elantra (similar to the one I had rented) and found it to be a very nice little car, when properly maintained. After that experience, I’ve never rented from that particular agency again.
Way to keep the miles off your loved ones. (I think I heard a working girl say that once too, but not to me.)
Am I the only one that needed a NSFW warning for the Jessica Janson link? Mr. Baruth has an article with a papal quote, then springs an unbuffered full-frontal link on us.
Every time I rent a car, it costs a fortune and I get some new thing with under 3K on it. I’d prefer to get the beater and save the bucks.
It’s a Baruth post: skeeziness is included at no extra cost.
Sorry about that. The original link was to her Twitter page, and then I changed it in a late edit.
I disapprove of having that kind of stuff “sprung on me” and I apologize to the TTAC readers who were burned.
unbuffered full-frontal link
Ummm, there’s at least one photo on her blog that’s a couple of quantum steps beyond full-frontal.
When I was riding shotgun in my mother’s brand-new CR-V on the Schuylkill Expressway, in gridlock, the crazy guy who jumped out of a car ahead of us and then jumped onto the hood and roof of our car left those same marks. My money says someone walked/climbed on that white Sonata.
Seems I always get stuck with rentals from GM and Chrysler overproduction. Have to give credit to National on their Emrald Aisle club. No stopping and waiting at any counters. Just go out to the lot and take your pick. Usually not the best selection, but it beats begging the desk person at Hertz for something better.
I absolutely believe this car has a soul. All do; even the beige-est Camry. As with people, some simply have more unique traits and character than others. Who hasn’t, at some point in their lives, met the human equivalent of a Camry or Sonata?
I’m approaching another appointment with Enterprise Rent-a-Car, and expecting a similar array. I use them because they are a fraction of the price of Her-vis-ional (someone please help with a suitable mashup for the suite of major rental agencies?). They are also a bit stingy where the rubber meets the windshield as well as the road. Everything on the cars I have gotten from them works, but foul weather does necessitate careful navigation.
And here I thought I was the only person who did a mechanical inspection on rental cars. I was at the Atlanta airport needing to rent a van or an SUV to haul some stuff cross country and had my pick too. I found a few Ford Escape SUVs in pretty terrible condition with tires that literally had no tread on them.
Walking around the lot I found some Dodge Caravan’s with Stow & Go seating, which was perfect since it was going to be just me in the van with some odds and ends that were in a small storage rental. Of the 5 vans I looked at, all were in pretty sad shape, with bald tires the norm. IF YOU RENT A CAR, CHECK THE DAMN TIRES TO MAKE SURE THEY AREN’T BALD!
I settled on a nice (reasonably) red Caravan and immediately “stowed” all the seats and made my way to my destination. I really thought the captains chairs were pretty nice and enjoyed reasonably good fuel economy trucking along about 70 mph.
Seriously folks, do a mechanical inspection if possible.
Checking the tires also applies to U-Haul and Ryder trucks. Those places have tried pushing trucks on me with bald tires for x-country moves.
This past June I started a consulting project at a location approx. 150 miles away from home- round trip. It was an ‘offer you cannot refuse’ type situation–if you catch my drift as I had been unemployed for 2 months from the cheesy start up that shall fail if there’s any justice in this world. (Not that I hold a grudge or anything! )
Looking at commuting options was a daunting task as mass transit was NOT feasible and my daily driver (1990 Mustange Conv. LX, 5.0 ) is close to 250k and really at the point where she needs much TLC. Complicating matters was that earlier in the spring, I had passed on my 2004 Accord LX Coupe to my sis as she needed a set of wheels after her messy split from her d*ckweed husband of 22 years. That Honda had been my wife’s daily driver before our baby arrived and was really pampered for the 88k we had it. Oil changes every 3k, all the recommended crap at the dealership (before I was a devoted TTAC reader) for fear of having the extended warranty voided by those selfish pr*cks.
Anyway, not knowing exactly how long the project would run, I sought out a local rental chain think them to be a bargain. Well….. promised a Sentra I wound up in a Caliber (BARRRF) w/ 22k on the odometer… not horrible, right? Except that the transmission was fisher price, I believe. I drove that POS up to Middletown NY, up 287, NY thruway and finally up Ft. 17 —- that transmission was pretty scarey. Once I pulled into the office complex I noticed I had a complete flat tire and had to go back to a filling staion for some air. At the end of the day
I had to fill it up twice before embarking on that 76 mile return leg…. when I called the rental agency their response was ‘you have to pay for the tire’. Man, I was completely annoyed by their response– probably w/o justification– but PO’d nonetheless.
That evening, I drove it back to the local agency, dropped it off saying I no longer needed– they hadn’t logged my call in so the tire issue was a non factor druing checkout and I got out thanking my stars as that Chrysler product is a POS.
Next day, drove over to a large National chain that starts w/ E and got the onlhy sub compact in their lot: a 2009 Accent– automatic but that was the only ‘perk’. hehehe. The car had been dropped off the night before and hadn’t been cleaned nor serviced…. however, sensing my rush they let me take it as is —– pretty gross, i know, but I had it washed later that day on my dime and it was worth it if only to remove the foot/toe smudges on the passenger corner of the windshield– yuck.
Anyway, I kept that car for 2 months until I got get some clarity on the project length. That white, plain jane Accent was thrashed to a lash of it’s life, The little 4 banger was routinely doing 85 on the highway and never failed to deliver less than superb mileage. I miss the luxury of thrashing a car– but not the $800/mo. needed to do so……
I’ve moved on to a 93 Corolla that I got from the proverbial ‘little old lady’ w/ 57 k miles on it. It had sat in her driveway for a long time and now i’m dealing w/ the niggling issues that pop when a car has been sitting too long. After 2 months I’ve dealt w/ a O ring and the Power steering pressure hose…. all the while, delivery a similar gas economy — and it’s completely paid for, no monthly payment!
After driving a Mustang for 20+ years, I never thought I’d be in a Toyota… but things happen, right? To quote Freud: Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar’
Was there any cat feces on the back seat? That is the worst rental experience of my life.
Cat feces seems small potatoes when contemplating the types of feces one might encounter in the back seat of a rental, eh? You got off easy, my friend. :)
One of my coworkers found a used condom in back seat of one of the rental returns. Another time, a Grand Caravan came back covered in mud inside and out; the interior smelled like a petting zoo.
Ah but prices vary dramatically esp based on location. Rental cars themselves are relatviely cheap everywhere but local fees, taxes, airport improvment charges etc vary widely and in some places (I’m looking at you Minneapolis) can nearly match the cost of the car. Las Vegas is by far the cheapest place I’ve encountered to rent a car, I dont think you’d need to buy a car if you lived there.
Yes, you do need to own a car if you live in Las Vegas. Because I do, and I do. Still, the low cost of rentals has me seriously considering buying a Nissan Leaf as a DD. Then I can rent a gas car for dirt money if and when I desire a road trip!
Lots of visitors so higher utilization of the rental fleet + low taxes and fees to encourage visitors + no road salt to eat the cars and no snow for renters to crash them = lower overhead for the rental places in Vegas than, say Minneapolis.
This past summer, I had the “pleasure” of driving a brand new Chevy Impala for a summer family vacation in South Carolina. It was the ultimate rental experience — not so much that anything was wrong as I can remember almost nothing memorable about the car. Maybe that is as it should be with a rental — who rents for the memories unless you’re on a honeymoon or some similar type of trip? (In which case, splurge and go for one of the “specialty” vehicles.)
I would NEVER buy an Impala — too floaty, not as much room as you think and a chintzy interior that looks about 15 years behind the times. The one saving grace was a big a__ trunk, which is exactly what I needed to haul all of the stuff of a family of 4.
The sales figures for the Impala still look strong, but it’s probably because Avis, et al, are still buying them. For the rest of us, there are so many better choices out there in the market.
I have had two occasions to rent low-end Hyundais in the last couple of months, an Accent and an Elantra. On the Accent, I was the first driver — had 8 miles on the odo. It was a stripped as stripped can be: crank windows, manual locks, manual mirrors, etc. But the radio did have activated XM and an iPod plug. I bet Enterprise didn’t even pay $10K for it. It soldiered quite well though and impressed me for a bottom end car. The Elantra was not quite as new but not worn out and it did well on highway trips. Got well north of 30mpg on both cars and if I had to, I could live with either of them long term. They were pleasant surprises.
Dollar is my favorite. If you arrive at the right (wrong) time of day, you can get a great bargain.
I always book the absolute smallest, cheapest car they have. They never have them, so they offer me what they have on the lot for the same price as the cheapo one.
One time was a PT Cruiser convertible, the last time a Chrysler 300 LTD. Both were around $12 – $13 per day plus taxes, fees, etc. I have been offered SUV’s as well for the economy rate.
Now don’t try this if you have other people along with you (especially the spouse). You might get stuck with the economy car, which you could always upgrade anyway, but for more $$$ than booking in advance.
My auto insurance includes rentals, (plus the credit card coverage), so I never pay for the extras.
Whassamadda with people anyway? Why do people abuse rental cars? The few times I rented cars, I treated them like they were my own. Abusing them is just wasteful and it just has to come back to cost us in the long run.
Recently had a Dollar Optima rental. Not bad, I can definitely see the ‘car as appliance’ paradigm in that car, but if you had to have an appliance that was affordable and that size, it certainly would do.
My last rental was a 2010 Jetta still fresh out of the gate. In a sea of Versas and Yari, it was a sigh of relief that the only German in the lot matched my paperwork.
Back in June I ended up with a 2010 Jetta as a rental to drive around Jack’s neighborhood. Most enjoyable rental I’ve had so far. Drove from Columbus to the Hocking Hills and discovered 1) it doesn’t have much engine braking going down hills on US-33 and 2) Ohio police officers are much less tolerant of speeding than I’m used to in Texas. The rental Jetta had scratches, but it was clean and in generally good condition.
Ahhh, in a previous job I travelled weekly throughout the West Coast and rented cars every time. My company had a corporate agreement with Avis, so I had no choice about where to go… and I guess the rental agency knew it.
One time, I flew into LAX and was handed the keys to an upgrade… a full-sized Buick rather than the usual midsize. I got onto the freeway and by a bit of luck, was actually able to accelerate up to nearly 50 mph (a rarity on the 405). As soon as I passed 40 mph the steering wheel started shaking and jumping and the front end felt like it was having some sort of seizure. Since I had a few hundred miles to drive over that week, I turned around and went back to the airport. I explained the issue at the counter and the guy’s reaction of “oh yeah, the last person who rented the car had complained about that… guess we never fixed it.” Thanks a whole lot. Of course, without even apology for my wasted time or another upgrade, I drove away late for my meeting in some POS high-mileage left-over compact that ran.
Last year, I flew into LAX again, but was planning to extend the trip on my own dime and drive to San Diego to visit an old friend for the weekend. I found a small agency, Fox, that had an incredible rate… if rented for a week, I got a PT Cruiser for $12/day. For that price I couldn’t have cared less if I was driving a high-mileage Trabant as long as it got me where I needed to go. The rental went well, the car ran flawlessly (other than the fact that it was a base PT automatic) and My total bill for 7 days including tax was less than 2 days from Avis for a similar car.
I really have no idea how the “big names” in the industry justify their rates. Yeah, the quick check in and out procedures are nice, but that saves them money as well. If they keep renting high-mileage junk that they don’t maintain, then they’ll get their clocks cleaned by the smaller local agencies. With more companies looking to cut expenses, the days of exclusive “company discount” deals that don’t offer any discounts are disappearing.
+1 on Fox. It’s the only agency we’ll rent from by choice. Our last trip to Vegas got us a loaded PT Cruiser for far less than the price of a strippo Accent or Yaris at Avis. Of course you have to travel miles away from the airport, but it’s well worth the sacrifice.
Got a Mercury Grand Marquis, easily the most grossly overrated piece of shit in the history of autodom.
While I don’t agree, I lol’d.
There is something pure about the base model bottom feeder rental car. I love them…..
I’ve had in recent years a GMC Envoy, Chrysler T&C, Focus, Sonata, Impala, Caliber, Sebring convertible, MGM, PT Cruiser and a few others I’ve forgotten. Mileage varied but none over 20k.
The Sonata and Focus were the best, Envoy and Caliber the worst.
I think that unviverally rental cars are trashed. The only ‘good’ experience I have had with a rental car was recently when I recieved the keys to a 10′ charger with 8 miles on the odo. I was relieved to know the alignment was only slightly out and the back seat had yet to be used as a restroom.
On the other end of the spectrum. I rented a Toyota Corrola in Wyoming. Good god that is a scary car over 75 MPH. Absolutely impossible to have a conversation with the passenger. Hyundai clearly makes a better car.
My wife and her parents and I rented a Sienna to drive from Detroit to Montana and back.. put somewhere around 6000 miles on that thing in a month.
They gave it to us with the change oil light on, claiming it’d been done already and that we should ignore it.
Gave it back to them freshly washed. A couple new rattles in the sliding door, but definitely was a good vehicle to be stuck in for over a week.
Paid ~700 to rent it for a month.. they wanted $900 to rent for two weeks. It came in handy having those extra couple weeks, because the wife’s 2001 Malibu decided to eat its head gasket _again_.
There was a 9-month period a while back at work when I’d have to rent a car roughly once a week for a visit to a jobsite (roughly 160 miles round trip). In general, I found that the Hertz fleet (at least in NYC) was pretty well-maintained, and I got several brand-new and many nearly-new cars. By far the roughest car I was given was a dirty, two-year-old Camry with 44K, mismatched off-brand tires, and a wheel bearing that would start droning at highway speeds.
But over the course of the project, I found that Cobalts were surprisingly competent, and could not really see any reason I’d prefer to drive a Corolla over them (though I wouldn’t want to own either one). Impalas were not as bad as one would think, but it could really use an interior freshening and the rear seat legroom was surprisingly stingy. I once had two brand-new Camrys –an SE and an LE–on back-to-back weeks, and was able to observe the dramatic difference in road manners between the two models. While the SE was a decent drive, the LE felt completely disconnected from the road and much worse than a Malibu and perhaps even the Impala in my opinion. And it seems like Hertz apparently ordered almost the entire 2010 SE production for their midsize fleet (I can count only a handful of times when I’ve seen a Camry SE that was not a rental).
I was excited when I got a redesigned 2009 Mazda 6 with 80 miles on the odometer (having enjoyed a somewhat thrashed previous-generation 6 rental several years before) but it really didn’t distinguish itself against its peers. Priuses were comfortable, but the ultimate anodyne driving experience. For some reason I never did get to drive a Fusion or a Focus, so I guess the days when the Hertz fleet mainly featured Fords are long gone, though it was a nice surprise to get a Mustang coupe once when I had booked a “standard” class car (supposedly a Pontiac G6 or similar).
In the hopes of avoiding another Cobalt, Corolla, or Camry (seemingly the most common cars in the local fleet), I booked an economy class several times but was never able to get an Aveo. It was a surprise to get a 5-door Yaris though (at the time I didn’t even know Toyota imported that body style), and my co-worker definitely looked at me a bit funny when I picked him up in a Kia Rio with manual roll-up windows. But there was something appealing about driving a basic, honest car with no frills.
I found that occasionally if you book far in advance with Hertz, I could get a higher car class for the same or less money than a run-of-the-mill compact or midsize, so I tried to take advantage of that when I could.
The red Corvette convertible I received after they ran out of the Mustang convertible I had originally booked was very fast, but a bit of a letdown. With about 20K (likely hard) miles on the clock, it rattled worse than an old taxicab and I actually needed to get it jump-started before I could make my way home.
One time I booked a “premium” class car hoping to get the advertised Grand Marquis, but they ran out of those and gave me a Mercedes C300 Sport instead, which was nice enough, though the dashboard design seemed overly fussy to me. I preferred the Volvo S80 to the Mercedes. The next time I tried for the MGM (perhaps in my own quest for Panther Appreciation?), I got a white-on-white DTS instead. They finally gave me a Crown Vic LX with leather when I booked a midsize, so go figure…
In the old days, we only kept our rental cars six months, tops. It was back in the age when one could write off the depreciation on taxes. By 1988, that was over, but still Ford sent us new Mercurys, Lincolns and Mazda cars and trucks every six months as they usually did.
What this means is that twenty years ago, you would rent newer cars. Those cars were not as well built as today’s, so there was a higher turnover due to the IRS tax structures, and how well vehicles manufactured in those days held up. Car manufacturers had siamese-twin relationships with rental car companies in those days as well. If there was a batch of cars that had been painted an unpopular color, or a model which did not move off the dealer lots, we got them. We also did deals with the other auto manufacturers on occasion because GM and Chrysler wanted a piece of the market we handled.
So folks back then rented newer vehicles with fewer miles. After their rental time was completed, these cars still smelled new. From there, you guessed it, they were sent as “program cars” to auto dealerships across the US. A white Lincoln on the lot? You probably bought a car that carried many brides and grooms to future happiness. A power blue Sable? Probably spent the first six months of it’s life smelling jet fuel at one of our nation’s airports.
Today cars last longer. They cost more. There are no more IRS tax write offs for vehicular depreciation generous enough to move the unpopular metal from Dearborn or Auburn Hills. This means that today’s rental cars have been farted in more than a men’s room at Yellowstone National Park in July. The cars are made better, but they carry a much higher load. I would not want to buy a used rental car, just as I would not have wanted to buy a mule that once worked in a coal mine.
Fortunately, cars have no souls. They are not creatures. Any personality traits they possess, we ladled upon them. What one driver enjoys, another despises.
As to a rental Sonata – done that. The car was excellent but road like it had concrete tires and no soundproofing. I had to use the satellite radio and crank it up to offset the torturous sounds the Sonata made on every tar strip and crevice. The car is excellent if you don’t have to drive faster than 40 miles per hour. Sitting still, the Sonata rocks! At highway speeds it just sounds like you are driving over rocks.
I stayed within the auto rental business for four years and really enjoyed it. I was one of the executives, so I got a fresh new ride whenever I wanted. I traveled nationally and employees jumped when they saw me arrive at any of our desks, giving me the freshest most awesome rental vehicles they could muster. If they knew I was to arrive, my vehicle was reserved surrounded by red ropes. I was spoiled, and knew it.
So, if you ever wonder about the rental car business, ask. I’ve about seen it all.
Worse situations? Spring break and prom nights. No matter how many precautions we took and how high we priced our cars, abysmally stupid parents would allow their ignorant moronic children contract-breaking situations where we saw totalled cars, deflated air bags, bloody interiors and windows and a depletion of inventory on vehicles we could have earned needed profits. I’ve seen cars returned without their doors. I’ve seen frightening wrecks that were driven by teens removed by the Jaws of Life, lifeless. We had an entire lot full of covered wrecks waiting for processing and legal settlements. We had a staff of insurance clerks processing our wrecks. We used to literally lock up any convertible or two door sporty car and not rent them out on popular prom nights, or we wouldn’t see them return.
Drunken wedding parties? Vomit can be washed out. Dented fenders? These car be mended. Dead kids? Now that is a senseless and completely avoidable tragedy we took every precaution under the law to prevent. Yet it still happened every weekend from April to June, thanks to their brain dead stupid parents giving them a set our our keys. The parents would sign every document we put before them ensuring that they were completely liable for the cars. We would specifically not rent to parents renting for their under age kids. We would turn down rentals to parents who didn’t seem to take our concerns seriously. We would specifically tell every adult renting a sporty car on a prom night weekend, that we are aware that many parents would rent these cars in order to allow our cars to be driven by their children. We would tell them that if their children drove the cars that it was a complete violation of the contracts they just signed. We tried everything, but we would still end up with a reduced fleet of popular cars, more covered wrecks in our back lots, and heartbreaking stories of dead kids.
Never rent a car for one for your kids – ever, ever. Or you will have the costs of a new car, and a funeral.
Good Lord, VanillaDude! This sounds like a Jack Baruth or Steve Lang story! At least their stories haven’t included any deaths…yet. Truly horrible and reflective of some of the world we live in.
I found it very interesting to read of the tax benefits (or lack of) regarding rental fleets – that explains a lot as to the condition some rental cars are found in when picked up. Personally, I have never had a real horror story, but many less-than-ideal cars that you wouldn’t expect from a reputable agency – “Rent-A-Wreck” 30 years ago in the Tampa area was an exception, but you knew what you got going in!
It does appear that various Hyundais have replaced the Tempos, Topaz, Neons, Geos and other bottom-feeder rental fodder and do seem better, but cars have gotten better, too.
@VanillaDude…..Great comment. I love reading “real world experience” stuff.
I’ve had good experiences with Enterprise, and they have a branch that’s a five minute walk from my house. Back when Budget had a good deal on Ranger pickups, I rented those a couple of times to work the Chicago auto show. The Enterprise folks seem to be a bit more helpful.
When I worked for DuPont, the couple of times I traveled and needed a rental I had to use Hertz and also, per the company’s safety policies, had to rent a full-size car. In Orlando for a week’s worth of training in the early to mid 1990s, they gave me a Thunderbird. Pulling out of a parking lot at a KMart, I was originally going to make a left turn but traffic wouldn’t relent, so I put on my right turn signal and made a right, just as the driver behind me decided to pull around me and do the same.
Turning in a wrecked car to Hertz was the least of my problems. Actually, it was no problem at all since DuPont was paying for full coverage. I just told them about the damage and dropped off the car. I did have to write up my accident for my supervisors – DuPont is very safety conscious. The biggest hassle was the fact that the lady who hit me pitched a fit, and I was an out of state driver with a rental car so the Florida Highway Patrol trooper ticketed me for improper lane usage – supposedly for turning right from the left lane of the driveway.
Later, I realized that I was already in the roadway when she hit me. I had started to straighten out and her left front fender hit between the passenger door and the wheel well of my Tbird. I fought the ticket via mail with a notarized statement indicating that since I was already driving on the roadway, and since road traffic has the right of way over drivers entering from driveways, it was the other driver who failed to yield right of way to me. Surprisingly the ticket was dismissed.
I’ve rented Cobalts and Impalas and come away wondering why people say such bad things about them. There was one Focus that was spec’d with tiny 13″ wheels, but it wasn’t terrible. My mom recently rented an Aveo from Enterprise. I only drove it for about 15 feet, but was struck by the use of fake wood in the interior and the fact that the gold insert on the Chevy bowtie in the grille had peeled off.
Rented a car recently, I believe it was from Budget. The car had the usual scratches, dents and dings but there was no place in the rental agreement to mark damage.
When I asked for it the staff swore that all damage was already noted, but could not provide me with a printout of said damage report. Then went on to say they did not worry about minor scratches and such anyway.
That just after giving me the long lecture on how I was responsible for any and all damage while trying to sell me the expensive additional insurance.
Did not have any problem when returning it but would have liked to have the regular damage report.
We flew to Orlando Sandford airport, 2006 maybe. National rented us a nice 2wd Trail Blazer, for a week. I returned a week later, the counter guy says “if your flying back to Toronto with “Jets Go”, it”s not going to happen,they went belly up an hour ago”.
National give us the SUV on a daily rental for as long as we needed it. They give me a list of other airports and directions. Later that day we managed to secure a flight home with Air Canada. I turned the Chevy in late, and low on gas at Orlando International.
The dude at National rental said, and I quote “you have had a bad enough day man,don’t worry about the gas or the late charge,have a nice flight”.
Since then I’ve never rented a car from anybody but National.
I travel on a weekly basis for work these days, and that means I get to experience a lot of rental cars, usually from the same Enterprise counter at the same airport. I keep a spreadsheet of the cars I rent and assign each a “grade” based on my impressions (of four days of driving and usually about 120-150 miles). Thus far, I’ve been the most pleased with the Ford Foci I’ve had (all with XM, and one with leather and sunroof–a great rental for one person for a few days with little luggage), and least with a Toyota Corolla (too many miles, soft brakes that I made the mistake of reporting to my wife back home, who thought I would be coming home in a box, and it had been smoked in to boot). I’ve been more impressed with the Kias and Hyundais I’ve had than with the Toyota. Lately, I’ve been able to upgrade to a Charger or 300 just about every week because Enterprise apparently has too many big Chryslers–I’ve had Mopars for five straight weeks now.
I’ve come to realize: A great rental is not always the same thing as a great car.