Remember the Converj concept Caddy rolled out for the Detroit show? You know, the good looking Volt coupe? The one that was held up as a reason to bring PNGV back from beyond the grave? Anyway, you probably had your hopes up for a quick production run. After all, GM’s Car Czar Bob Lutz hath already proclaimed that a production Converj would look “exactly” like the concept. So it’s official, right? Right? When Automotive News [sub] actually asks the question, Lutz’s maximum takes a moment to aknowledge the presence of reality. “Ready to go? Well, first we have to prove to ourselves that we have the money,” Lutz says. “And then that it’s a high enough priority to displace something else, and that we can actually make money on the vehicle, and that there is potential customer interest and so forth. We haven’t done any of that work yet.” So now we know: “proving to ourselves that we have the money” is step one (post-concept) for GM product development. With an estimated debt load of $60b and a market cap of you-depress-yourself-with-the-math, that process of “proving to ourselves that we have the money” must make for some entertaining material. Reality series!

As Robert wrote earlier, GM is piling on the incentives to move metal in a January market that seems to be moving like molasses. And though GM and its finance units are benefiting from the largess of the federal bailout bonanza, their decision to delay incentive payments in December is putting the squeeze on its dealer network. Especially as they’re forcing dealers to buy more inventory in order to qualify for incentive cash. Automotive News [sub] reports that GM’s $4b loan “provided a short-term relief,” but  “it didn’t fix the issue,” according to GM’s Mark LaNeve. La Neve tells AN that he isn’t planning on altering the incentive schedule. So, although payments have resumed, they are now two weeks behind schedule. And he doesn’t know when they’ll return to the normal schedule; it all depends on when tranche deux of the federal sugar shows up. Meanwhile…

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As US sales continue to tumble of a giant cliff, it becomes tempting to spin a short-term trend into a long-term projection. Just as peak oil theorists were everywhere last summer, warning that gas would never again cost less than $4 per gallon, many analysts now think that the US car market will never again reach 17m per year. Automotive News [sub] takes on the debate, fielding arguments from both sides. On the pessemistic front, players like Pricewaterhouse Cooper see the 17 million years as “an aberration,” artificially pumped up by a false sense of personal wealth, lax lending standards and irresponsible automaker incentives. Daimler’s Dieter Zetsche, Mazda’s Jim O’Sullivan, and private equity baron Wilbur Ross fall in the sub-17m camp as well. They collectively estimate an eventual recovery of 15-16m units by around 2012-2014. The other side of the argument is concisely summarized by Robert Schnorbus of JD Power: “Of course we will return to 16 or 17 million. Every recession we hear this argument that Americans have fundamentally changed, but Americans love their features and comfortable cars.”

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Automotive News [sub] reports that President elect Barak Obama is calling on automakers to develop sustainable business models. Aparently, it would be unacceptable “to keep them on their lifeline through taxpayer dollars in perpetuity.” Although Obama admits he’s not an industry “expert”, he claimed making the bailout work means everybody, “from labor to management to creditors to shareholders, giving something up.” Specifically, taxpayers will now be sacrificing $1.5b to Chrysler Financial. And yes, it’s coming from the second half of TARP, so it has the O-man’s blessing. And so… “Zero percent interest financing will be [immediately] available on 11 Chrysler LLC vehicles, and in many cases for up to 60 months. Vehicles included in the program are Chrysler Town & Country, 300 and 300C, Jeep Grand Cherokee, Commander, Wrangler, Dodge Grand Caravan, Charger, Magnum, Challenger, Ram Pickup and Ram Heavy Duty.” Oh wait, that’s our sacrifice too. And isn’t  this how we got in this mess in the first place?

Auto industry suppliers have been stuck between a rock (penny-squeezing OEMs) and a hard place (volatile commodity prices) for some time now. And though the Detroit Three argue relentlessly that their own bankruptcy would doom them in the eyes of consumers, bankruptcy protection has practically become the norm for their suppliers. Which is why supplier firms need a bailout of their own in order to give Detroit’s bailout a chance. Chrysler’s endless winter break, GM’s half-sized Q1 production plan and general industry turmoil is about to cause exactly what the bailout was supposed to prevent: cascading supplier bankruptcies. Bloomberg documents the doom in detail, concluding with American Axle’s Dick Dauch’s assessment that “there’s a shakeout occurring.” Unless…

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Remember when Farago asked what wasn’t wrong with this picture of the Chevy Spark? It turns out that despite 74 comments, nobody correctly identified the Spark’s major flaw: it’s a hunk of foam. The Spark was first teased on the Today show, where GM Design guru Ed Welburn first showed off the city car’s Pokemonesque snout. At the time, we (and everyone else in the autoblogosphere) concluded it was a Beat Concept, ignoring Welburn’s promise that it was a “new” city car concept set to debut on Sunday at the Detroit Auto Show. When Sunday came, GM only rolled a Beat into COBO Hall but posted a picture of the Spark on its corporate webpage promising a production model by 2011. Confused, the guys at Kickingtires contacted GM and learned that the Spark wasn’t rolled out because they don’t even have a rolling prototype of it, just the foam model that was trotted out for Today. The “real” Spark prototype will be revealed at the Geneva Auto Show later this year, but for the record, GM’s Beat/Spark policy seems to currently stand as follows. Beat was shown a year ago, 2.5m webizens voted for it over its Trax and Groove concept-mates, and it was then ruled out for an American launch. Now there’s not even a prototype Spark, but we’re told it will definitely come to the US. Confused? You probably should be.

“Cash for Clunker” policies have been enacted in a number of developed countries as a conveniently “green” way to stimulate new car sales. The idea is sold as a greenhouse gas-reducing measure which provides tax credits for removing older, less-efficient models from the road. Of course the point isn’t to get people out of cars or permanently reduce the number of GHG-emitting vehicles: to claim credits, you typically have to buy a new car. Texas already has its own take on the debt for more debt swap. And now the Congress– well the auto industry anyway– wants a piece of the action. Hence the Accelerated Retirement of Inefficient Vehicles Retirement Act of 2009.

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When Pontiac picked the name “G8 ST” from 8k entries to its “Tame The Name” competition, it was obvious that weak-wristed marketing would be a major component in its Aussie lite-ute’s American campaign. After all, the most, erm, unique vehicle in the GM lineup would surely need a good old-fashioned ferocious animal or force of nature name to succeed. And now that the G8-amino has been canceled, its namer has confirmed the mundanity of the instincts behind the ST moniker. Pickuptrucks.com reports that the Name Tamer, Joseph Warren, was supposed to receive an ST for his excellence in humdrummery. But with the ute canceled he’s opted for a Pontiac Torrent. That’s right, G8 ST lovers, the obvious replacement for your symbol of individuality is a brand-engineered Theta-platform crossover. Oh sure, Warren picked the “hot” GXP version with 268 hp, 18 inch 5-spoke chrome wheels, twin hood scoops, and “a unique front and rear body kit.” And yes, the choice of any $30k Pontiac product is a little like picking the most subtly elegant Steven Seagal movie. But c’mon, a Torrent? No Solstice? No G8 Sedan? No wonder “G8 ST” was all this guy could come up with. Just sayin’.

GoAuto hears from GM Car Czar Maximum Bob Lutz himself that the Camaro and G8 will be the last US market GM products based on Holden’s RWD Zeta platform. “The strategy we had a few years ago of basically deriving a whole sweeping global portfolio off the Australian Zeta architecture … frankly, we have had to abandon that dream,” said Lutz. “This is because, whether you are in the United States or in China, fuel economy mandates are getting more and more severe, and we just could not base our strategy on doing relatively large and relatively heavy rear-wheel-drive cars. I suspect the same thing is going to start to bite the traditional rear-wheel drive producers.” Not that they’re ditching the platform entirely. “It is our intent to continue the Australian rear-wheel-drive cars; we will continue building them and doing a next generation and so forth and so on,” says Mr Maximum. “And, to be honest, they continue to be my favourite cars. I think they are absolutely wonderful – but the regulatory environment is such that it would be imprudent to base a whole global platform strategy on them … much to my personal chagrin, by the way.” And what of the rumored Alpha compact RWD platform?

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From Defense News comes word that the United States Army is purchasing 4,000 neighborhood electric vehicles(NEVs) for use as on-base transport. Six of Chrysler’s Global Electric Motors (GEM) NEVs were delivered in a ceremony at Fort Meyer which was probably intended to highlight the army’s long-term efficiency goals. But something must have been lost in the bureaucratic translation. “We hope by showing the rest of the country what we can do with electric vehicles we can potentially drive the technology and the market, including the Chevy Volt [and] the Tesla that are out there now, and show a greater demand,” said Paul Bollinger, deputy assistant secretary of the Army for Energy and Partnerships. I’m sorry sir, but what does the military have to do with a car that doesn’t exist and a $100k sportstoy? The NEVs probably make a lot of sense for on-base, especially if they can give it a sweet military nickname to wipe out memories of the cutesy GEM moniker. But seriously, Volt and Tesla? Whiskey Tango Foxtrot? Once the military reaches for its wallet though, there’s no knowing what might happen.

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Jimmy Wong of Hong Kong spent six months and untold fortunes converting his 2002 Lotus Elise to an all-carbon fiber body. The result? About 80 pounds of saved weight. Life’s tough on the bleeding edge.

GM’s VP For R&D Larry Burns has a new post up at Fastlane, calling for a “partnership between the U.S. government, auto manufacturers and suppliers, the energy and infrastructure industries, and other key stakeholders focused on transforming the automobile.” After all, as Burns says “we all seem to be coming to the conclusion that the automobile as we know it — powered by a combustion engine — must eventually go the way of the horse and buggy. It is simply not sustainable.” And so Burns humbly offers GM’s solution: The Cadillac Converj, A concept car that is powered by electricity. Unless it wants to go more than 40 miles, in which case it’s back to the ol’ ICE. But luckily “significant challenges” are actually a good thing when you are going for government handouts and not the Standard Of The World.

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