Don’t blame Jerry Hirsch for this headline. Heck, don’t blame the LA Times either. This headline comes courtesy of the Modesto Bee, which demonstrates its auto reporting incompetence by making the oldest assumption in the non-car-guy book: if they make V6 and V8 engines, they must make V4s as well. And though this abject ignorance may be good for a chuckle, it’s indicative of a larger problem: no matter how good of an auto writer you are, chances are you have to send your piece through an editor who knows little to nothing about cars.

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At the end of May, GM had no fewer than 288,000 pickup trucks sitting on its dealers’ lots (up from 275k in April). With gas prices on a short-term dip, but in the midst of a long-term increase, and with the season of traditional gas price spikes upon us, that could give The General cause for concern. After all, even a short-term spike in gas prices could cause a sharp falloff in truck sales, stranding huge numbers of trucks on dealer lots. But, GM North American boss Mark Reuss tells Bloomberg,

We’re not going to run big incentives to clear inventory. We’ll adjust inventory on a production basis.

That’s good news for GM’s financial position, and a promising sign of a new spirit of responsible pricing. But in an industry as complex as this, even good decisions could have troubling consequences. If GM “adjusts inventory on a production basis,” the “Tier One Gypsies” who fled Orion Township to avoid a 50% pay cut could find their temporary refuge at Flint Truck drying up, as HD pickups are likely the first to undergo “adjustments on a production basis.” And though that’s not explicitly GM’s problem, it could ratchet up the pressure to roll back the two-tier system in the upcoming negotiation session, and generally fire up the UAW’s dissidents and hard-liners. Meanwhile, with CAFE and gas prices converging on Detroit’s BOF bread-and-butter, we’ll be watching for signs of trouble as GM adjusts to the larger issue of likely long-term declines in truck demand.

I am sorry I am being brash but when you owe money to people and you pay them back you shouldn’t be celebrating. You just cut them a check and send them home and say thank you on your way out

We’ve given Fiat/Chrysler CEO Sergio Marchionne some grief for his somewhat unseemly self-congratulation at his repayment of “every penny loaned less than two years ago.” This quote, given to CNBC, is more what we were looking for. After all, one imagines that Chrysler doesn’t hold such celebratory spectacles for folks who finish paying off loans on their Calibers and Caravans. Acknowledging the mundanity of Chrysler’s Wall Street re-fi is a much better way for the firm to re-boot its post-bailout relations with the American people. For this quote, as much as for the promising but still-wildly-uncertain turnaround of Americas most troubled automaker, I am happy to extend Mr Marchionne and his team a modest, unceremonious word of thanks.

Rumors began surfacing about a month ago that Mazda was eying a complete pullout from US production, as it endures weak sales of its last American-built product, the Mazda6. Mazda had reportedly planned for 100k units of Mazda6 production at its Flat Rock plant, which it shares with Ford, before the economic crisis sent the US market tumbling. And with only a little more than 36k Mazda6s built alongside the Ford Mustang at Flat Rock last year, Mazda has little reason to maintain its joint venture, and with it, its US manufacturing presence. Now, the Nikkei [via the DetN] reports that Mazda’s pullout is more likely than ever, citing an unnamed Mazda source as saying it hoped to sell its 50% stake in the Flat Rock AutoAlliance plant to Ford as it restructures its global operations.

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Fisker’s plug-in luxury car has been delayed again, as sales that were once planned for March and April, and then delayed to May or June have now been delayed until July, according to GreenCarReports. And that’s not just bad news for Fisker and its customers, but it’s bad news for President Obama’s goal of getting a million plug-in cars on American roads by 2015 as well. According to the DOE, the government’s goal banks on Fisker selling 1k Karmas this year, and 5k next year, rising to 10k in 2013. It’s also a bad sign for the government’s expectation that Fisker will sell 5k of its next-gen “Nina” (which has not even been shown in concept form) next year and 40k in 2013. It seems that the DOE’s half-billion dollar loan to Fisker is still a ways from yielding the desired results…

Panther lovers, look away! The Detroit News has picked up a story on Bayliff Custom Automotive which… well, let’s just let the words take over where that unforgettable image leaves off, shall we?

“We’ve been custom-building Packard automobiles since 1978,” said [C. Budd] Bayliff, whose Bayliff Custom Automotive of Lima, Ohio, builds old-style Packards (and other cars) from the ground up and offers Packard-inspired customization styling kits for contemporary vehicles.

Bayliff Custom Automotive also does conversion work for another Ohio-based company that specializes in funeral vehicles.

The Packard kit, as shown here on a Ford Crown Victoria, is priced from $15,000 to $18,500 and includes a Packard-style grille and overhood, headlamps, rear fender skirts, an oval rear window, stylized trunk lid, custom two-tone paint, and various changes to the interior.

If that’s a Packard, I’m Enzo Ferrari. Oh, and I have a lovely original 250 GTO to sell you…

UAW Boss Bob King spoke to Detroit Regional Chamber’s Mackinac Policy Conference about what he calls “The 21st Century Union,” arguing that “the union has changed and we challenge business to change with us.” But while King talks cooperation and mutual benefit, his union is preparing for what promises to be a tough fight with the automakers to create a new contract that deals with the shop floor poison of the two-tier system, securing union representation on automaker boards, and rolling back union concessions without sending automakers back towards bankruptcy. Kings words are worth listening to and considering, but the upcoming contract negotiations will be the ultimate measure of the UAW’s professed changes.

I’ll refrain from editorializing at length here because I’m genuinely interested in hearing the B & B’s take on Chrysler’s attempt to overcome what was one of the industry’s worst reputations for interior quality. The question here isn’t “are Chrysler’s interiors better?” because there’s no debate on that point. The question is: given that they’re having to do a 180 for Chrysler’s reputation, are they good enough? Personally, I find some downright appealing, some quite passable and some still lacking… and my major complaint is that I feel like the firm tries too hard to project a veneer of premium-ness on even its cheaper products, which make the interiors feel less than entirely “honest.” But that’s just my take… what’s yours? Video of Chrysler’s interior design boss Klaus Brusse, talking about the changes in Chrysler’s interiors, after the jump
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A report by UNEP [PDF here], the UN’s environmental body, finds that recycling rates for some of the key ingredients in EV and Hybrid cars are woefully low. The chart above shows “functional recycling rates” for 60 metals, and the rate for such key elements in the production of EV and Hybrid batteries and magnets as Lithium, Vanadium, Lanthanum, Neodymium, Dysprosium, all have recycling rates of 1% or lower. Not only do many of these elements have the potential for creating ecological damage, but many (especially the so-called “rare earth elements”) are considered relatively scarce…. and not recycling exacerbates both of these issues. But, notes the report, the complex fusion of elements used in both batteries and EV magnets could present huge challenges in ever improving these rates of recycling.

Where relatively high EOL-RR [End Of Life Rates of Recycling] are derived, the impression might be given that the metals in question are being used more efficiently than those with lower rates. In reality, rates tend to reflect the degree to which materials are used in large amounts in easily recoverable applications (e. g., lead in batteries, steel in auto- mobiles), or where high value is present (e. g., gold in electronics). In contrast, where materials are used in small quantities in complex products (e. g., tantalum in electronics), or where the economic value is at present not very high, recycling is technically much more challenging.

Hat Tip: Auto123

AutoNation boss Mike Jackson has long been the front runner to inherit Bob Lutz’s mantle as the most opinionated guy in the car business, and recently he’s been moving to lock up the distinction. Jackson recently gave the world the concept of the gas price “freak-out point” as well as delivering memorable quips on “green car” demand (while calling for higher gas prices), and has been outspoken about the industry’s struggles with “push” production, oversupply, fleet dependence and more. And now he’s laid out what may very well be the basis for a solid “car guy consensus” for political progress on safety issues. Autoobserver reports:

The main points of Jackson’s outline to improve road safety: 1) Make text-messaging illegal – and since that’s unlikely to make much difference, install technology to block text messages in moving vehicles; 2) Raise the gasoline tax to fund safety-enhancing and congestion-reducing traffic-management technology, including intelligent road signals and total automation of toll collection; 3) Get serious about lane discipline by restricting trucks to right-hand lanes and passing only in the left lane.

Can I get an “Amen”? Politics are one of the most divisive issues in American life, and TTAC struggles with the inevitable polarization caused by political topics every day… so hats off to Jackson for solidifying a non-partisan agenda that all (or at least most) car guys can get behind.

So… does this look like a BMW to you? Blame the camo if you must, but this forthcoming BMW-branded “0-Series” looks like it’s shaping up to appear as mundane as anything BMW has ever slapped a roundel on. Which makes sense, I suppose, given that it’s going to be the most mundane BMW-branded car yet built, constructed as it is on the next-gen MINI’s transverse, front-drive platform. Even BMW’s forthcoming i3 sports a freakier, funkier high-roof baby hatch look… and despite our initial fears, it’s apparently rear-drive as well. On the other hand, we’ve been here before with Mercedes… and they pulled a surprisingly sexy design out of a humble, front-drive mule. Here’s hoping BMW can pull off some equally adept styling magic, otherwise we’re looking at the BMW Cimmaron right here…

For years now, Detroit’s inability to compete in the increasingly-important hybrid drivetrain has been part of its larger perception issues, driving the view that the American automakers are both less environmentally responsible and technologically adept than their Japanese competitors. GM waorked through a number of underwhelming hybrid technologies, including its BAS “Mild” Hybrid system and its Two-Mode V8 hybrid, while Ford had to back away from Bill Ford’s precipitous promise that it would build 250k hybrids per year by 2010. For a while now, it’s seemed that Ford and GM were content to avoid direct hybrid competition, focusing on “leapfrog”  technologies like pure EVs and the Chevy Volt extended-range electric car… but now it seems they’re going back into Prius-style “parallel hybrids” in a big way.

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Are Audi’s Mad Men missing Bertel’s services? They must be, as the Detroit Free Press reports that Eminem’s licensing firm has filed a motion in German court seeking to ban this advertisement. Joel Martin, manager of Eight Mile Style, tells the Freep that Audi did not license the Eminem song “Lose Yourself,” adding

It’s stunning. What makes it extraordinary is the similarity to the way Chrysler is using (the song). We saw it and said, “This has got to be a joke.”

At this point Audi’s only statement on the matter comes from its US operations, which simply notes that the A6 Avant will not be marketed here. “This has got to be a joke,” sure seems to sum the situation up…

According to the White House’s just-released report titled “The Resurgence of the American Automotive Business” [PDF here]:

The U.S. Government provided a total of $80 billion to stabilize the U.S. automotive industry through investments in General Motors (GM), Chrysler, Chrysler Financial, Ally Financial, and programs to support automotive suppliers and guarantee warranties. As of today, $40 billion has been returned to taxpayers. While the government does not anticipate recovering all of the funds that it invested in the industry, the Treasury’s loss estimates have consistently improved – from more than 60 percent in 2009 to less than 20 percent today.

Independent analysts estimate that the Administration’s intervention saved the federal government tens of billions of dollars in direct and indirect costs, including transfer payments like unemployment insurance, foregone tax receipts, and costs to state and local governments.

This is as close as we’ve gotten to a thorough accounting of the full cost of the auto industry bailout, as both GM and Chrysler have erred on the side of counting as little of their own taxpayer support as possible (leaving out aid to their predecessor firms, finance companies and suppliers). On the other hand, it’s also two short paragraphs in a ten page report… and the rest of the document hews pretty closely to Democrat strategist Ron Klain’s advice to the White House, specifically

tell the story with fewer numbers and more emotion; less prose and more poetry

While the media debates whether this means the bailout bill will come to $14b or $16b, it’s becoming clear that the final number won’t make a big difference… at least politically.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, the “Detroit Three” automakers are once again on top of the charts, as a wild and wacky month of sales closed with some serious shifts in the volume-manufacturer landscape. Not only did Chrysler claw its way back to number three for the month, but Hyundai-Kia beat out all the Japanese competition save Toyota, which narrowly escaped with the top non-Detroit volume number. Detroit fans should savor the win, as the Japanese automakers should work through most of their inventory and supply issues by sometime this summer. Things should get back to (relatively) normal at that point, but for now it’s clear that literally anything is possible.