Vanity Fair's "Society and Style" blog has introduced "StickShift: The Gay Car Blog." Note: it's not a "Car Blog for Gays." It's a "Gay Car Blog." So what constitutes a "gay car?" According to blogger Brett Berk, "a car's gayness is based in its inhabiting the margins of conventionality. A Gay Car is quirkier, more enigmatic, or more fiercely accessorized than the average vehicle. (It also likes to sleep with other Gay Cars)." If that weren't stereotypical enough, and we think it is, Berk says he "won't go after low-hanging fruit like Saturns or Subarus." Instead he'll look at "cars that emit the subtle semiotic signals that register on my GayCarDar." Not to mention answering burning questions like "How Do Gay Guys Keep Their Cars So Clean?" Berk concludes by saying "So gas up, fasten your seatbelt, and get ready to suck some tailpipe." Needless to say, the folks over at Gaywheels aren't particularly amused. 

Even though diesel fuel costs more than gasoline, even though diesel engines cost more than their gasoline equivalents, VW plans to sell TDI versions of the Jetta and Sportwagon stateside in 2009. To get the party started, VeeDub's announced that TDI buyers will be eligible for a $1.3k Federal Income Tax Credit. Yup, your tax money in their pocket, under the Advanced Lean Burn Technology Motor Vehicle credit program. The EPA has certified the TDI at 29 mpg city, 41 mpg highway. BUT VW cites test results from "leading third-party certifier, AMCI" (paid by VW of course) claiming the models get 38 mpg in the city and 44 on the highway. And while they work that one out, Toyota can't build enough their gas – electric Priora fast enough, even with a $500 price hike. [Source: VW]

How can Dodge dealers offer trucks for 50 percent off of sticker price, as several have done in the past month? Money from the mother ship. Right now, Chrysler is offering up to $5k – $6k rebates to customers buying a Ram 1500. At the same time, ChryCo's kicking-in up to an additional $9.5k in "dealer incentives." The extra cash is a desperate move to clear th decks before the new Ram arrives; helping dealers to do what's got to be done to sell their moribund Rams without going out of business (ostensibly). So when you see a $35K Ram for $17.5K, Chrysler's subsidizing the bulk of the difference to the dealer. Great for generating dealership traffic, great for bargain hunters. Not so great for Chrysler's finances or future.

Last week, I pointed out that there are a lot of brand new trucks sitting on U.S. dealer's lots gathering dust. I illustrated the fact with an ad from a Dodge dealer selling Ram Quad Cabs for 50 percent off manufacturer's suggested retail price (MSRP). As bad off as Dodge is with their 160-day supply of Dodge Ram full-size pickup trucks, they didn't hold a candle to Nissan's 489-day supply of Titans. An email from Cleek tells us that a Nissan dealer in Rock Hills, SC took matters into his own hands this past weekend. He's advertised 45 percent off MSRP sale of pickups, vans and SUVs.  It looks like massively discounted truck clearance sales may be the wave of the immediate future. So far, the biggest discount we've see is 50 percent. How low do you think they'll have to go to clear inventory as the model year winds down and inventory piles up? How long before we see brand new pickups for under $10k? (God help light truck residuals.) Have you seen any dealers in your area offering huge discounts like these on trucks, vans and/or SUVs?

The automakers whining lobbying in Washington seems to be paying off. The Detroit Free Press reports that 71 members of the House of Representatives have said they'll support the Advanced Technology Vehicles Manufacturing Handout Initiative. The $25b program's meant to help the domestic automakers catch up with the transplants meet the 2020 CAFE standard of 35 mpg by giving loaning them money to engineer fuel-efficient vehicles or upgrade old plants. Rep. Sander Levin from Michigan explained, "Funding this new program is critical to the future of the U.S. auto industry, as well as our nation's efforts to reduce our dependence on foreign sources of oil. The federal government must be an active partner in the effort to create these jobs and technologies here in Michigan the United States." Several members of the Senate have also expressed support for the program, including Sen. Barak Obama (surprise!). But the chances of it (or anything else) being passed this year are slim. Congress will start their August vacation recess this week; they have no plans to convene after the election. That leaves only September for them to get anything done. As if. [thanks to carveman for the link]

After accusations of "betrayal," blockades by the Canadian Autoworkers union, threats of lawsuits against the union and sops tossed to the union, GM is moving ahead with plans to close their truck plant in Oshawa, Ontario. However, it looks like it'll cost them a bit more than they'd anticipated. The Globe and Mail reports GM and the CAW have struck a deal whereby GM will add another model to the mix produced at the auto assembly plant there. Oh, and pay some workers for four years after the plant closes. The complete details of the deal will be announced to workers later today, but it includes paychecks for laid-off workers with 26 years seniority for four more years at 65 percent of their current wages. That makes them eligible for "a special retirement incentive applicable to people with 30 years of experience." Workers with 27 to 30 years would also be paid until they reach the 30-year mark. In return, GM gets to keep building cars in the most expensive location in North America. Such a deal!

A few weekends back, while putting a few (hundred) miles on an Audi Q7, my wife and I went into the Blue Ridge Mountains in north Georgia. When I programmed our address into the GPS for the return trip, it directed us down the Unicoi Turnpike (part of Georgia Highway 75), which turned out to be full of switchbacks, twists, hairpins and everything else that makes a road fun, along with some beautiful scenery.  The map showed other roads in the area that looked even more fun. We didn't have time to explore them then, but we're already planning a trip back to check them out. So what about you? What is your favorite road for becoming one with your car and having pure unadulterated fun while driving?

When Chrysler's employees got back from their forced "downtime," they found an email from El Jefe himself. In it, CEO Bob Nardelli welcomed them back and brought them up-to-date on what's been going on (like they hadn't been watching the news or reading TTAC). Boot "em Bob brags on things they've done, from donating to a NASCAR charity to receiving "the top ranking in the automotive industry in the NAACP's annual report card on corporate America's financial relationship with the African-American community." What's interersting: what he didn't say. While he mentions "reports on Chrysler Financial's annual process of renewing its credit conduit ," he doesn't comment on reports that say ChrysCo's in such bad straits they'll be facing much higher rates. He talks about "attractive offers" on Dodge Ram pickups– without mentioning the glut they're trying to clear. And then there's this bit about "creating partnerships and alliances to extend our portfolio, geographic reach and technology capabilities." Could Nardelli be setting-up the troops for another announcement about cutbacks, leading to a sale to Nissan or another automaker? We'll let you know as soon as we hear anything more. [thanks to you-know-who-you-are for the tip]

Click here for pdf of email 

GM's press release begins with a rhetorical question: "What would happen if you turned more than 20 undercover film and surveillance professionals loose to show the potential drawbacks of buying a used vehicle that is not manufacturer certified?" And then, without a trace of irony, "the results were not at all surprising." The General dispatched actors posing as car buyers– complete with hidden cameras and release forms– to "ambush" [their words] and embarrass [ours] private sellers with "questions that private party used-vehicle sellers often don't want to hear." During one close encounter of the heinous kind, the actor asks an unsuspecting seller if he can install a phone in the seller's home so he can call for roadside assistance any time, day or night. Other private sellers were harassed about "things like financing and courtesy transportation." "We even bought one of the cars and then tried to return it a few days later with a three-day, 150-mile guarantee," bragged copywriter Jim Hagar. 

[Click here to go to GM's usedcarambush.com] 

The mayor of Warren, MI has the answer to The Big 2.8's woes. The MacComb Daily reports that in a letter to the Michigan Congressional delegation, Mayor James Fouts called for the reinstatement of the federal income tax deduction for interest on auto loans. "More new vehicle sales means more jobs, less unemployment and lower government costs to assist the unemployed," Hizzoner reasoned. Representative Candice Miller thinks "the mayor's idea is very creative." What neither of them seem to realize is that all of the Detroit manufacturers have offered 0% interest rates– and these promotions haven't exactly set sales records. Deducting the interest wouldn't have any effect on payments, and that's what floats buyers' boats. Also, Mayor Fouts better be careful what he asks for. The resulting legislation would be  industry-wide. It would likely hurt the American manufacturers more than it would help them.

Bloomberg passed on an unsubstantiated report in Nikkei English News that claims Honda, Nissan and Toray Industries are teaming-up to develop new carbon fiber materials for mass-produced automobiles. Toray is the world's largest producer of carbon fiber. They're hoping to make it economically feasible to use the material in large enough quantities to reduce vehicle weights by up to 40 percent. Japan's Ministry of Economy, Trade and Industry is kicking in ¥2b over a five-year period to help fund the research. It didn't say if this project would be an extension of existing carbon fiber nanotube research, or if it will explore new materials. Either way, with new tailpipe and fuel economy regs in the offing, the race to add lightness has begun, plug-in hybrid or no.

Ford's PR folks are busy weaving their tangled web. Case in point: in the press release announcing the dismal Q2 results for Ford Motor Credit, The Blue Oval Boyz state the net loss is "$1,427 million." I guess that doesn't sound as  as bad as saying they lost $1.427 billion in one quarter. Compare that to last year's second quarter earnings of $62m and that's quite a deep hole they've dug. Anyway, let's blame the economy! Yes, U.S. consumer preferences shifted "from full-size trucks and traditional sport utility vehicles to smaller, more fuel-efficient vehicles… [which] caused a significant reduction in auction values for used full-size trucks and traditional sport utility vehicles." In other words, their parent company put all their eggs in the truck/SUV basket, gave credit where credit wasn't due, offered lease deals based on unrealistic residuals, and had nothing to offer in the subcompact market when the market shifted. But it sounds so much better to tell the stockholders "it's the economy, stupid" than to admit "we screwed up."

At the risk of sounding like FBI BAU Supervisory Special Agent Jason Gideon, Christian Nevell Bovee observed "No man is happy without a delusion of some kind. Delusions are as necessary to our happiness as realities." If so, GM Car Czar Bob Lutz must be the happiest guy on earth. Maximum Bob was in London for the auto show. He reacted to questions about GM's layoffs, production cuts and the usual laundry list of woes with the statement above [via Just-Auto]. MB's clinging to his claim that his employer's problems are caused by the "unprecedented" rise in gas prices. What more, "we're quickly adjusting to meet the challenges of a changing market… Of course, we will adjust our product portfolio to meet the market where it's headed… We will continue to develop… our brands accordingly." And that's why they'll be keeping the Cobalt around (and unchanged) forever. And why Pontiac is being "nourished" with a lineup of rebadged cars from other GM divisions. And why GM still has no competitive subcompact car to offer the North American market. If all this indicates GM's doing "the right things," well, God help them if they're got it wrong.

I don't know how we missed this, but we're not alone; Autoblog didn't find this story until this morning. Anyway, Michigan's Democrats are pushing for a $4b handout stimulus package for their floundering automakers. The Detroit Free Press quotes Presidential candidate Barak Obama pledging support for such aid, stating "America cannot truly prosper unless Michigan prospers" while speaking in Warren, Michigan last week. (Governors of about 49 other states might disagree with that statement.) In a letter pandering to the UAW, Obama promised he "will provide real solutions necessary to help this industry compete and win in the global economy." Of course, his "solutions" boil down to the only "solution" politicians have for any problem: taxpayer money. Barack and other Democrats are pushing for a $50b "stimulus plan" for the auto industry, including loans at "below-market interest rates." Republican candidate John McCain is opposed to the loan idea, but he does support a $300m prize for battery development, tax credits for fuel-efficient vehicles and strict goals for flex-fuel vehicles. Either way, it's going to costs a bundle to correct what fifty years of over-priced, under-performing executives and their yes-men have produced. Or, dare I say it, not.