The Battle Creek Enquirer (where’s my cereal toy?) reports that The Lincoln Motor Car Foundation will be building a Lincoln-centric museum on the campus of the Gilmore Car Museum in Hickory Corners, Michigan. Naturally, Ford Motor Company will be kicking-in some dough for the project. With Lincoln all but dismantled at this point, a museum dedicated to such a storied marque makes a truckload of sense. Sort of like a pre-historic fly caught in amber, only nicer. And you can extract the design DNA without unleashing rampaging dinsoraurs. This new museum should provide car fans a terrific opportunity to check out some classic American Lincolns from the days when the only thing the brand worried about was Cadillac and the occasional Imperial. [Note to RF’s former press car provider John Lawlor: time to donate LBJ’s limo. Summer’s fine and the tax credit’s are easy.]

Around the Key Largo portion of my escape from Tropical Storm Fay, the belt squeal from the engine bay of our rented Dodge Caravan reached epic proportions. The van limped and shuddered into Homestead AFB for the night. The next day, we discovered that a rear tire was low, most likely due to a pothole impact. The spare was deflated as well. Thrifty roadside assistance routed us into rain-soaked Miami International, to exchange cars. As I unloaded the van (which held my luggage and about 300lbs of stuff to be delivered to Warner-Robbins AFB), I asked the porter queuing the cars if I could move it over to the far left to expedite unloading. "What?!? You want me to make a special concession for you?" I guess not. I tracked down several carts to haul everything. I was berated again for not moving the car further down to make more space (despite the ample opening in the six spaces beside me). As Monica emerged from the rental counter with keys in hand, the porter took off with the car, and the rest of our luggage, to the nether regions of the lot. Much arguing later on who takes priority– the customer exchanging a broken van, or the porter who wants his lane clear– we were off in a beige Caravan. The dirt-covered interior had boogers smeared on the dashboard, and it smelled bad. Like the previous Caravan, it also had been in a noticeable front-end accident. The things you learn from adversity…

The expression "doing well by doing good" is totally hot in business/academia. This Third Way thinking attempts to reconcile the [allegedly] conflicting notions of "making enough money to buy a Ferrari and a house in the Hamptons" and "getting enough props for being socially responsible to keep the trophy wife happy." As your average Land Rover belches-out enough CO2 to offend every environmental group on planet earth, Land Rover's got to hold a pity party to make their PC bones. And so they have, by donating 60 vehicles (48 Defenders, eight Discoveries and four Freelanders) to the British Red Cross (BRC) and other national Red Cross societies in "troubled" countries (Sierra Leone, Mongolia, Liberia, Lesotho, South Africa). Accepting the gift, Sir Nicholas Young, the CEO of the BRC, remarked that the people they help are often "in the places that are hardest to reach." True dat. And we applaud both the positive impact of this largesse and its PR efficacy. Every time the BBC shows all hell breaking loose somewhere, the guys handing out medical supplies and food are in a butch Defender 110. Our only question: why didn't Land Rover ship some free vehicles to the Red Cross (or other worthy group) in Tata's Indian pridelands? 

I've long argued that the UK's anti-speeding jihad has seriously degraded the relationship between the average British motorist and the police. Despite the public's underlying laissez-faire attitude towards invasive policing– if you're not doing anything wrong you have nothing to worry about– it stops being "fair" when it starts being you. By now, millions of otherwise law-abiding motorists have been trained to see the police as "the enemy." By the same token, the us vs. them gestalt has alienated the police from their so-called employers. The Times reports that the Metropolitan [London] police have been emboldened to the point where they don't even feel compelled to pretend to give a shit about road safety. How else could you explain a Facebook site created by the police where they boast about accidents and, get this, collisions with pedestrians? Needless to say, the Powers That Be have pulled the "Look I’ve Had a Pocol" (slang for police collision) page, and warned 14 officers to cut that out. But not before we learned that "One picture… showed a police vehicle in an accident with a small white car. The officer who posted it wrote: 'I did him a favour. At 82 years old you just shouldn’t be on the road and if you are, then most certainly don’t go through a green light into the path of an innocent police car.' Another member wrote: 'Ran over a drunk. I believe he has a permanent limp and a hefty payout. I was given a three-month holiday from job driving. Ooh, bummer.'" 

The Detroit Free Press reports that Toyota has finally responded to months-old accusations that its Tacoma pickup suffers from "unintended acceleration." Reading ToMoCo's letter to ToMoCo tells the National Highway Transport Safety Administration (NHTSA), it's clear they're treating them with all the contempt engendered by the Audi 500 debacle. "Toyota believes that it is likely that many of the consumer complaints about the general issue of unwanted acceleration… as well as many of the complaints about this subject that have been received by Toyota, were inspired by publicity… Even taking (the accusations) at face value, it is clear that the majority of the complaints are related to minor drivability issues and are not indicative of a safety-related defect." NHTSA has been investigating some 32 complaints of the deus-ex-machina defect in 2004 – 08 Tacomas. Toyota held its own investigation of 12 pickups that had supposedly suffered from unintended acceleration back in October, concluding that the machines harbored "no mysterious brake-circumventing defects." In fact, having prepared for this possibility, Toyota programmed its drive-by-wire system to report an error in case the accelerator pedal and throttle are mismatched. And no such error codes have not been found on any Tacomas reported to have driven themselves into stationary objects. 

Chrysler executives are taking on what may well become the world's worst job: a customer satisfaction survey. The Chrysler 300– the number of homoerotic Spartans executives calling one customer per day— will be competing "to see who can generate the most successful sales referrals." ("Hello, I'm Bob Nardelli. Please buy one of our cars so I can win a sales bonus. PLEASE!") The Detroit Free Press say Nardelli's boys want to "bring the company closer to our customers but also to bring our customers closer to the company." Not one to miss a chance to pimp for consulting, Dave Sargent of J.D. Power gushes, "I've never heard of anything on this scale." This is not the first time Chrysler's jeffes have tried to rappel out of the corporate penthouse. Hey, whatever happened to that program where the suits drive used Chryslers? Anyway, at the advertised calling rate, it would take Chrysler's highly-paid "change agents" 707 days to reach the 212k customers hit by the most recent Sebring recall. Who's running the office pool on how long this program lasts? [Welcome to longtime TTAC commentator John Thorner as our latest blogger. We hope to see more of his work soon.]

File this under "News That Effects Me Personally." As in, "Those city hall pricks are taking tacos out of my mouth." Where I live in North Eastern LA, there are– or rather were— six taco trucks with a one mile stretch along the same road. As The New York Time rightly reports, each one offers uniquely delicious fare. Except for that one up on 51st — their tacos suck. But the other five, man… So here's the dirt straight from the hungry horse's mouth. Restaurants are complaining (and have been complaining) that the "roach coaches" are stealing customers because their food is so cheap. My new mortal enemy, county supervisor Gloria Molina, is pushing through the ordinance that will require taco trucks to move every hour. Effectively putting them out of business. Why? Henchman Gerry Hertzberg claims the trucks represent a "big quality of life issue." Whatever that means. Taco truck owner Jose Naranjo puts it best, "We are poor people feeding other poor people." Yeah, and me! The ordinance goes into effect today. This is a total tragedy as one truck in particular serves-up the best carne asada tacos in all of Los Angeles. And trust me, I've looked. Anyhow, I wrote Molina a letter and signed the save our taco trucks petition. Though I fear you can't fight city hall. Tasteless jerks. 

Wow Volkswagen. Just when I thought you couldn't do anything more to get a VeeDub into the service bay, you really step it up. Right now, I just bring my GTI in every other month when the check engine light illuminates my face with fury. But the new "carefree maintenance program" announced Wednesday is next-generation stupid. For the first 36k miles of ownership, VW will do all your scheduled maintenance for free. What is the scheduled maintenance you ask? Changing the oil (which VW claims is only necessary every 10k miles on 2009s onward, thanks to synthetic oil) and uh, checking a whole bunch of fluid levels. VW's press release [via the great press release funnel otherwise known as Autoblog] touts the new program as a "great way to improve our owner loyalty for the brand, as well as increase consumer consideration." Uh no and no. This isn't going to sell cars, and the opportunity to save $20 bucks on the free oil change isn't going to make up for all the dealer-service department scamming guaranteed to take place. In fact, if I was a VW NA corporate suit (poor sods), I'd be doing everything I could to keep people AWAY from the dealers, to minimize the amount of rip-off-itude.

The General has settled a class-action lawsuit claiming damages from its "Dexcool" coolant, agreeing to pay up to $800 each to customers who can prove damages. Plaintiff attorneys estimate that the final number of claims could top $20 million, a bill which would cost GM of hundreds of millions of dollars. "It could be multiple nine figures; it depends on how many people make the claim," co-counsel for the plaintiffs, Jack Brady tells the International Herald Tribune . "I think it could be a huge settlement." Of course, while the people who had to replace manifold gaskets and heater cores get between $50 and $800 for repairs, Mr Brady and his co-counsels will pocket up to $23 million in fees and $2.8 million for expenses. Still, if you own a GM vehicle with the 3.1-liter or 3.4-liter V6 engines for model years 1995 to 2003; the 3.8-liter V6 engines for model years 1995 to 2004; or the 4.3-liter V6 engines for model years 1995 through 2000 and have had to pay for coolant-related damages, you should check dexcoolsettlement.com to file a claim.

We stumbled upon GM's NA VP of Design Bryan Nesbitt in a small, windowless room semi-populated by a brown-nose of bloggers (infiltrated by TTAC in search of free food). Justin and I arrived just in time to hear Nesbitt explain why station wagons are cool in Europe: because everything is smaller there and they shop more often and something about old guys not hang-gliding off of Mont Blanc. Anyway, the confab broke-up and I asked Nesbitt what he thought of fake hood scoops. After a moment of PR-related facial rictus, Nesbitt said he didn't personally like them, but you gotta keep the customer satisfied. Hence the new Z28 Camaro will have a massive [functional] hood scoop. Yes, but what of the Pontiac G8 faux intake? Nesbitt said that GM's design studio is at the mercy of its customers, specifically dealers demanding extra bling. For example, Lund Cadillac Hummer Saab (Phoenix) retrofitting the 9-7x with a 3X-sized Saab badge, telling Nesbitt to get with the program (sacrilege!). Nesbitt admitted that a large part of his job is making the best of an ugly situation. "I may not like Hawaiian shirts, but I can make sure it looks as good and fits as well as it can." Let's call it aloha aesthetics.