Sometimes I go overboard making fun of people who drive cars that I don't like. But not this time. Toyota's "Look at us – we're on the Internet" blog has a post about a guy who claims to have converted his Prius to look like a shuttle from Star Trek: The Next Generation. Whereas before he had a car that should have gotten all the chicks, he probably now has to scrape them off the hood of the car. Willie Yee – a psychiatrist! – has painted his Prius (Sharpie?), put on new space-age wheels, and a has a CD with sound effects from Star Trek that makes the sound system display look vaguely Enterprise-ish. Sounds like he really went overboard with the conversion process, which seems about as intense as a four-year-old pimping out his tricycle. So if you see Yee on the road, you don't have to think "A Prius driver… maybe he's a nerd." You'll know he's a nerd. And not a very good one; the blue uniform from Next Generation seasons 4-7 that he wears is for science officers. He wouldn't be allowed to drive. Now who's the king nerd?

The Seattle Times reports that the U.S. Secretary of Transportation wants to lower federal gas taxes. The bad news: Mary Peter wants to replace the taxes with tolls. "Peters aired her views Friday to the Washington Roundtable, a group of business executives who have backed transportation campaigns. She argued that Americans lack 'investor confidence' in higher gasoline taxes, because she said the money is spent inefficiently and hasn't reduced congestion." Reduced congestion? Since when was that the point of federal gas taxes? Since… "Her department is offering $139 million to launch congestion-price tolling on the Highway 520 floating bridge by September 2009. Peters said the federal government will yank a similar grant from New York City if the state fails on Monday to approve a toll for driving into Manhattan. And there's another unstated reason for the policy shift: as U.S. vehicles become more efficient (by law) and/or cash-strapped motorists drive less, Uncle Sam's fuel excise income will tumble. And just in case you thought toll taxes are regressive (they are), how about this? She praised an experiment on Highway 167 that begins April 26, when solo drivers will be able to pay to enter the uncrowded high-occupancy-vehicle lanes." [thanks to Ryan Kauzlarich for the link]

Some 80 percent of New Yorkers already travel by public transportation, but Mayor Bloomberg has promised increased subway service, faster bus routes and yes, congestion charges to push that percentage ever higher. In a dog-bites-man article, the NY Times observes that some New Yorkers remain fiercely loyal to their cars. Despite traffic jams, honking horns and urban road rage, drivers value the freedom to come and go as they choose: "It gets me closer to the job," says George Ballina, sitting in the car with his wife in Lower Manhattan. "From the train you have to walk. … it's an hour and 15 minutes with the train and about 18 minutes with the car. Big difference." Also not surprising is that drivers prefer to avoid dealing with other people — to have their own quiet space and amenities: "I really make my car comfortable," says Warren William of his touch-screen DVD with speakers lining the doors and trunk. "Every time I step in my car, I have my system, I have my music. I like it really nice and quiet. I like the peacefulness."

We stumbled upon GM's NA VP of Design Bryan Nesbitt in a small, windowless room semi-populated by a brown-nose of bloggers (infiltrated by TTAC in search of free food). Justin and I arrived just in time to hear Nesbitt explain why station wagons are cool in Europe: because everything is smaller there and they shop more often and something about old guys not hang-gliding off of Mont Blanc. Anyway, the confab broke-up and I asked Nesbitt what he thought of fake hood scoops. After a moment of PR-related facial rictus, Nesbitt said he didn't personally like them, but you gotta keep the customer satisfied. Hence the new Z28 Camaro will have a massive [functional] hood scoop. Yes, but what of the Pontiac G8 faux intake? Nesbitt said that GM's design studio is at the mercy of its customers, specifically dealers demanding extra bling. For example, Lund Cadillac Hummer Saab (Phoenix) retrofitting the 9-7x with a 3X-sized Saab badge, telling Nesbitt to get with the program (sacrilege!). Nesbitt admitted that a large part of his job is making the best of an ugly situation. "I may not like Hawaiian shirts, but I can make sure it looks as good and fits as well as it can." Let's call it aloha aesthetics.

The Detroit Free Press reports that Alvaro de Molina has been named to replace Eric Feldstein as CEO of GMAC "because of rising mortgage defaults and slowing auto sales." The Cerberus-owned finance company lost $2.3b last year and things don't look so hot this year so far. So where is Feldstein going? As seems to be the trend nowadays with execs who lose billions, he's being bumped up the corporate ladder where he will "will advise Cerberus on investments in financial services companies" according to a GMAC statement. Yep… sounds like just the guy I'd trust for advice on financial services.

© 2008 by ttac.com 

In an op ed entitled "Driving Miss Chloe," New York Times scribe Caitlin Flanagan argues that the drop in teenage drivers reflects over-protective parents. Seemingly oblivious to journalistic scandals involving fictional composites, Flanagan invents a teenage girl named Chloe and castigates her for riding with Mom in a Toyota Sienna– instead of learning how to drive. "When I was in high school in the 1970s, we had a name for teenagers like Chloe: losers… In my day, we did whatever was necessary to get out on a Saturday night: we climbed out of windows; we jumped on the back of motorcycles; God help us, we hitchhiked. We needed, on the most basic and physical level, to be out in the dangerous night, with one another, away from our parents and the safety of home. It was no way to live, and some of us didn’t. But it was a drive so elemental and essential that there seemed no way to deny it." In a nod to reality, Flanagan mentions the enormous cost of insuring a teen driver– and then dismisses it in her relentless assault on today's teens' lack of gumption. "Learn to drive? Why would they want to do that?" she concludes. Offer coherent analysis of teen driving trends? Why would Flanagan do that?

Bloomberg reports that workers at Toyota's Cambridge assembly plant (Corolla, Matrix) will vote on whether or not to join The International Association of Machinists and Aerospace Workers (IAM). Organizer Ian Morland says the union filed the necessary paperwork with Ontario's Ministry of Labor to mandate a vote by 3100 of the plant's 5,059 employees next Thursday. Morland says 40 percent of the required survey cards favored union representation. "The support we're seeing is overwhelming." IAM Canadian General Vice President Dave Ritchie's statement on the union's official website must send chills down ToMoCo suits' spines: "We welcome the opportunity to act as the representatives for the Toyota Canada assembly plant workers, in order to ensure that fairness and equity will always be a part of their daily lives in the work place." Saying that, members of Toyota's workforce at their Freemont, California NUMMI (New United Motor Manufacturing Inc) are UAW members.

You may recall this most excellent dispatch re: sourcing a new Nissan GT-R at list price. It was penned by TTAC car reviewer and bon vivant Jay Shoemaker. Since writing the epistle from the "budget supercar front," Shoes managed to source the beast. As the headline attests, it all ended in tears. At my request and considerable risk to his rep, Jay has allowed us to publish his email on this abortive venture. [Note: no flaming the rich guy.]

"I was successful in finding a way to acquire one of the first US GTR's at MSRP. I had to pull strings to accomplish this, but I suppose that is what strings are for. Anyway, Nissan USA gave me a nice letter of introduction and I flew to Tokyo last week to see and sit in the GTR (I did not get to drive it). As a prospective owner, I hated it; the external appearance is too boy racer and the interior is pretty much basic Nissan with one or two extra leather pieces. It gave me claustrophobia to sit inside it and was terribly uncomfortable. So after all I went through, I came home and cancelled my order. I suppose I should regret that I will not have the opportunity to drive one of the first U.S. GTRs, but I have never liked Nissans, don't like V6 engines, don't like turbocharged engines in general and definately don't like the idea of 20-inch run flat tires. Next month, I am off to Germany to pick up my Audi R8 at the Neckarsulm factory and drive it on the Autobahn to console myself."

On the same day that GM announced its disastrous February sales figures, GM's Board of Bystanders OK'ed an executive reshuffle. Those of us expecting the Board to clock the prospect of a fourth year of declining sales, profits and U.S. market share, and then defenestrate GM CEO Rick Wagoner (to float away on his golden parachute) were surprised to discover the current CEO remained in situ. Meanwhile, Chief Financial Officer Fritz Henderson assumed the re-created post of Chief Operating Officer. While pundits aplenty saw this as a Henderson succession play, has Fritz already relieved Rick of command? The Wall Street Journal says "Speaking to reporters yesterday at the Geneva auto show, Mr. Wagoner outlined what his role will be in the auto maker's hierarchy, saying that he will focus on global growth, advanced technologies and environmental lobbying… Mr. Wagoner said he also hopes to at least double his amount of annual visits to China, a fast-growing new market where GM has become well-established. Visiting roughly twice a year in the past 'didn't feel right,' he said." If you ascribe to Ted Turner's Lead, Follow or Get Out of the Way philosophy, it's clear that Rick's now checking out any time he likes. But will he ever leave?

According to the Financial Times' "Who's who" roundup, relations between the two halves of Porsche's ruling family are chilly– despite joint ownership of what will be the largest automaker in Europe. Apparently, Ferdinand Piech, chairman of Volkswagen, and Wolfgang Porsche, chairman of Porsche, had a bit of a spat at a recent Porsche board meeting. The two ordered everyone out of the room while they hashed out their unspecified difference. When they emerged, Wolfgang was "the surprising winner." According to an unnamed source close to both men (presumably not in a sexual way), the two grandsons of the legendary Ferdinand Porsche "are not scratching out each other's eyes but it is no secret that the Porsches and Piëchs were never really a loving couple." (Then again…) "Who's who" implies that Wolfgang Porsche's power is on the wane. And yet… his close relationship with Porsche CEO Wendelin Wiedeking (is it me?) is said to give him an upper hand in the new power politics at Porsche Automobil Holdings, VW's new master. Supposedly. Anyway, it's good to see the "collegial partnership" is off to such a good start…

No question: The Big 2.8's supply chain is in disarray. Plastech, Delphi, American Axle– these are just three of the U.S. parts suppliers already in bankruptcy, with fully 25 percent of other major domestic parts makers teetering on the edge of Chapter 11. The domestics are operating on the assumption that the faster they outsource their parts production overseas, the better. Speaking to Automotive News [sub] analyst John Casesa warns that Chrysler's new purchasing czar John Campi's rush to confront domestic suppliers (Plastech) and seek low cost foreign replacements may not be such a good idea– especially when seen in historical context. "In the early 1990s, former GM purchasing chief J. Ignacio Lopez proved that point. When he bid out proprietary part designs to garner the lowest prices, Lopez launched a brutal price war that created lasting animosity between GM and its suppliers. The industry is still struggling to heal the wounds." And speaking of war, does it really make sense for the domestics to combine Just in Time production and long, long supply lines in this time of crisis? As Toyota's quickly resolved Tundra problems show, it's best to keep your friends close and your suppliers closer. 

As opposed to… "Inactive Subaltern Status Quo Soldier?" Whatever you call Peter Arnell, Automotive News [AN, sub] reports that Chrysler's "Big Idea" consultant is prowling Auburn Hills, tweaking the American automaker's branding, product planning, customer relations and dealership coordination. (Arnell was the brains behind the hugely expensive Celin Dion – Chrysler Pacifica promotion; regarded as a total flop.) Reading between the lines, AN reckons Arnell may exacerbate Chrysler's long-standing tradition of internecine conflict. "Arnell's consulting services bring him into areas of the company that already have bosses, raising the spectre of possible turf wars and executive conflicts. Among the people and the areas to watch: Trevor Creed is Chrysler's chief designer; Deborah Meyer is chief marketing officer; Frank Klegon heads product development." Arnell– salary unknown– may have the edge on his erstwhile rivals. He worked with CEO Bob Nardelli over at Home Depot, where the dream team unleashed the caps lock ORANGE WORKS in the winter of '06. The range of chi-chi bespoke products (e.g. a martini shaker-shaped fire extinguisher) did nothing much for Home Depot's bottom line.

After Bloomberg sounded the alarm re: The General's lousy prospects, phenomenal cash burn and potential slide into Chapter 11 (or foreign ownership or both), the Detroit News adds fuel to pyre. Of course, Sharon Terlep does does so in her own special way (i.e. it wazzunt me). "General Motors Corp.'s already fragile turnaround could be derailed by any number of threats looming in 2008, from more strikes at parts suppliers to a further meltdown of the housing market, according to the automaker's annual report filed Thursday." Without nailing GM for guarding the terms and conditions of its payment into the $34b union health care VEBA, the scribe hints at the implications. "GM's ability to spend in other areas of the business will be affected if it can't secure financing under favorable terms." After citing another possible downgrade in GM's ratings "if GM continues to burn cash in its home market or if operations outside the United States become less profitable," Terlep can't resist throwing GM a bone. The penultimate danger cited: "Competition from rivals introducing key new models this year. GM's product cadence will slow down this year after a number of successful, high-profile new vehicles in 2006 and 2007." Successful? Successful how? 

In an interview with the International Herald Tribune, Renault-Nissan honcho Carlos Ghosn reveals that he's still interested in an American partner for his Franco-Japanese alliance. Between endless paeans to Nissans miracle turnaround and the underlying strength of diversity in the Renault-Nissan alliance, Ghosn holds off on the PR long enough to let a few nuggets slip through about his mergers and acquisitions strategy. Although talks between Renault-Nissan and GM led nowhere in '06, a recent joint venture with Chrysler to sell rebranded Nissan vehicles in Brazil may point to Ghosn's dancing partner of choice. And with talk of Chrysler's dismemberment never far from the lips of Cerberus-watchers, Renault-Nissan could come into an American nameplate sooner rather than later. Whomever his eventual bedmate may be, if Carlos the Jackal can be trusted at all, the stars will begin aligning before any announcements come through. "This is for the long term," Ghosn tells the IHT about his visions of an American partnership. "But when it comes, then you will know we have been consistent." Is he referring to the Chrysler/Brazil deal, or is there much more to come? Time, and not much of it, will tell…

This one's a bit screwy. According to Reuters, Ford's compensation committee wants to pay Billy Ford– even though the former CEO and current Board Chairman pledged not to draw a penny in salary until FoMoCo had returned to profitability (currently scheduled for 2009). In a note filed with the SEC, Ford (the company) said it's decided to change the terms of of Bill Ford's 2005 compensation arrangement "in light of the company's progress in restructuring its troubled North American operations." The committee insisted that it was "not reasonable" to expect Bill Ford to continue to work for free "particularly after he has received no compensation for three years." Ford spokesman Oscar Suris said Bill Ford had turned his back on compensation worth roughly $25m to $33m. OK, now, The Detroit Free Press reports that Billy has reaffirmed his promise not to bank the bucks until Ford's in the black. TTAC is investigating.