South Africa’s Paramount Group’s latest offering, aimed at what Auto Motor und Sport describes as “safety-conscious drivers,” steals a name that Panther-lovahs may recognize, but that’s where the comparison ends. Would the gentleman like 4X4 or 6X6? 300 HP diesel, top speed over 70 MPH, and a 400+ mile range? That’ll show the insurgents neighbors. In all seriousness, AM und S have a ton of pretty staggering photos, but the whole thing is a tiny bit creepy. Cool pics of big trucks are supposed to be fun, lighthearted weekend fare, but for some reason I find myself cringing a little at the thought of vehicles like this being used in places like Syria, Bahrain and hellholes globalized. But then, how did they put it in Popular Warlord Magazine? Oh yes: “the truck doesn’t make the hellhole, the hellhole makes the truck.” Words to live by right there.

According to an infographic in the WSJ, based on research undertaken by Hyundai-Kia, the US doesn’t just buy a huge number of vehicles… we buy our cars a greater diversity of colors than any other market in the world. Sure, silver, grey, black and white still make up just over 60% of our new cars, but amazingly that’s one of the lowest percentages among large markets. By comparison, those four colors represent a whopping 885 of all new cars sold in South Korea. China and Japan buy 79% and 78& of their cars in those four colors respectively, but China is the only nation represented with a significant proportion of yellow cars sold, at 3%. Why? I’d guess it has something to do with the fact that yellow was once forbidden from buildings and garments, reserved for the Imperial family by sumptuary law (although it could be a more recent craze for “Bumblebee” edition Camaros). Meanwhile, India and US have the highest rates of (literally) green cars, at four percent, Europe has the blues, with 18% ordered in that color, and red-blooded Americans still buy the most red cars at 12%.  And with a full 9% of new cars purchased in a color not represented here, the US has the most offbeat car colors as well… a distinction that seems fitting to our individualistic, car-worshipping culture.

I don’t know about you, but I’m finding the “analog clock=luxury” thing a bit played out. One upon a time, the old-school interior clock was everywhere… and folks called it a modern convenience. Then it became a genteel, slightly throwback Maserati hallmark. Then it became a symbol of Infiniti’s admiration for Maseratis, and its desire to stand apart in the luxury market. Then Chryslers started adding clocks as it moved, unconvincingly, to position itself upmarket. Now? Now the interior chronograph just seem to be a symbol of trying to hard to appear luxurious without really offering anything unique, distinctive, or innovative. Which is why I’m a bit concerned that an early shot of the new Lexus GS, a car that has years of underachievement in a crucial segment to make up for, seems to show that Lexus has succumbed to the siren call of the dashboard clock.

To the best of my knowledge, Lexus has never indulged in an analog dash clock before (at least in the US market), as its interiors have always been modern and purposeful, emphasizing function over frippery. This isn’t a question of “ruining” the car itself… few customers are likely to put as much emphasis on an analog clock as I do. But in this small step I do see signs of a brand drifting away from its pioneering roots and towards the directionless malaise that inevitably leads to fad-chasing, and style over substance. Even if Lexus does need to reinvigorate its aesthetic DNA, ripping of the cheesiest “Luxury: I Has It” signifier in the interior design playbook ain’t a promising start. Don’t clock up a good thing, Lexus!

I hoped that BMW’s GT concept would be a one-and-done type of experiment, like the X6 or the Two-Mode hybrid drivetrain, selling as badly as it is. No such luck. Auto Motor und Sport has caught a forthcoming 3 Series GT prototype wallowing and leaning its way around a test track in Germany. That’s right, what you’re looking at right there is a 3 series… a nameplate that’s synonymous with sharp handling and a nailed-down ride. And just look at it, leaning on its tip-toes like a dune buggy that’s been developed by a French suspension engineer. Unless of course this isn’t a 3er GT at all, but the planned X4 “SAV”… but then, how is anyone supposed to even tell the difference between the two? One’s a softer, slightly larger, slightly jacked-up fastback 3 series, while the other is… essentially the same thing? Talk about losing the plot…

The A5 is a crucial element of Audi’s fashion-nugget appeal, and these things have to move with the times lest the times move them. Post-update, the A5 now looks far more like its smallest (and to be fair, its newest) sibling, the A1… at least around the all-important headlights. The big news under the skin is that the old V8 has left the building, as the S5 will now be powered by the S4’s supercharged 3 liter V6. There’s also a new electro-mechanical steering system, active brake leveling, a new middle diff on AWD models and a newly-available rear “sport differential.” It’s not yet clear how many of these upgrades and options the US market will be offered (here’s one hint: we won’t get the slick four-door “Sportback” version you see in the gallery), but really, with a car like this don’t the pictures say everything? I’m not saying the A5 is a car people buy solely for its looks, but… oh, who am I kidding?

When a brand like Aston-Martin releases a new car, it’s de rigeur to assemble some cameras and hand out a freebie to a legend of the motoring world. But when a brand like Aston-Martin creates a deeply controversial car like the Toyota iQ-based Cygnet, the luminaries of road and track are hardly going to be lining up  for the thing. Luckily if you ask nicely enough, they might be convinced, as apparently Sir Stirling Moss was, to re-gift the thing to the wife. That way he doesn’t have to endure the embarrassment of driving the thing, but Aston still gets to hype the fact that the Sir Stirling said

Since seeing a pre-production Cygnet in January I knew that it was the perfect car for Susie; a proper little piece of British luxury and perfect for our life in town.

Unfortunately, as Pistonheads points out, the Cygnet isn’t even exempt from London’s congestion charge… which is typically an important criteria for a car to be “perfect” for life in London town. Oh, and it’s about as British as yakisoba. But hey, Sir Stirling “bought” one for his wife so…. um… yeah.

With a new generation of BMW 3-Series on the way, you expect to see plenty of photos of it testing on the Nürburgring’s Nordschleife. What you don’t expect to see: photos of it being towed through the “Green Hell.” According to Auto Motor und Sport, this prototype’s breakdown on the ‘ring is “unusual at this stage of development,” but the German publication notes that the defect that caused it is unknown. They simply write that, in the midst of a test drive, the next-gen Dreier “ran out of breath.”  Hopefully the boys at BMW will be able to suss out the problem before the new Dreier launches in Europe next year… nobody likes to see a car like the 3-Series making its way through the Nürburgring on a trailer.

The transition from exclusively gasoline-powered vehicles to the new panoply of permutations of gas and electric power has not been easy on the old emm-pee-gee. The imperfect-yet-universal (in the US market) measure of efficiency finds itself at a loss to compare an electric car’s efficiency with that of a gas-powered car, and completely falls apart as a relative measure of efficiency between plug-in-hybrids which use gas and electricity in different ways (see the ongoing battles over the Chevy Volt’s efficiency). Into the breach have stepped several challengers to the emm-pee-gee’s supremacy, including the weak MPGe (which was responsible for the Volt’s disastrous “230 MPG” introduction), and the “Kilowatt-hours per 100 miles” measure championed by Motor Trend in a rare display of admirable pointy-headedness. But the Gordian contradiction of efficiency measures is that they must be both accurate and easy-to-understand… and if the MPG’s history tells us anything, it should probably err on the side of the latter prerogative.

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OK, so Toyoda-san didn’t so much introduce the new Camry as introduce its headlight. The good news is that the headlight looks like progress. The bad news is that most Americans were probably a bit distracted by the video’s spare production values and Mr Toyoda’s somewhat awkward demeanor (to protect you from your own hypocrisy, commentary on Toyoda-san’s accent will be moderated… unless you can post it in Japanese). Net-net though, Toyota can’t help but come across as an earnestly nerdy lot (led, as they are, by the king of the auto otaku), which fits their brand image well. And for all the talk about styling being the prime mover for consumers, and the necessity of emotion in design, if this new Camry is simply a fresher take on its earnestly nerdy predecessor, Toyota will have accomplished its mission. I’m beginning to wonder if Detroit’s intense dislike of Toyota isn’t simply because it’s the biggest Japanese competitor, but because Toyota’s leadership culture is the unassuming, unglamorous opposite of Detroit’s flamboyant tradition.

Since cementing its premium-retro-cutesy positioning in the marketplace, MINI’s been leveraging its two platforms into a niche-munching binge. Soon the MINI lineup will range from cozy Coupe to two-door “Sport Activity Vehicle,” and will include two convertibles, multiple versions of the two-door hatche, two-and-a-half-door hatch, and four door SUV. So what’s missing? A Moke? A Delivery van? What about a re-interpretation of the old Mini Pick Up? You and I may feel like the MINI brand  already has plenty of niche offerings, thanks, but here is indisputable proof (found in a supermarket parking lot) that the market thinks MINI hasn’t chased enough niches. Carry on then, lads…

The idea of a “spiritual successor to the E-Type,” has been around since the XJ-S turned out to be anything but, and since 1997 we’ve been tormented with lust-worthy visions of small-roadster loveliness like the XK180 and F-Type concepts. Beyond the realm of ideas, however, the neo-XKE has had a tougher time of things. Jaguar has threatened several times to produce a version of its stunning concepts, but each time the rumors have ended in disappointment. But now Autocar has caught the first physical evidence that a new “E-Type” is actually crossing over into the realm of reality, with these first shots of a test mule.

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Tommy Hilfiger… My God, don’t they know? This stuff is simulacra of simulacra. A diluted tincture of Ralph Lauren, who had himself diluted the glory days of Brooks Brothers, who themselves had stepped on the product of Jermyn Street and Savile Row, flavoring their ready-to-wear with liberal lashings of polo knit and regimental stripes. But Tommy surely is the null point, the black hole. There must be some Tommy Hilfiger event horizon, beyond which it is impossible to be more derivative, more removed from the source, more devoid of soul. Or so she hopes, and doesn’t know, but suspects in her heart that this in fact what accounts for his long ubiquity.

— William Gibson, Pattern Recognition

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Alfa’s four-year product plan has leaked to autoblog.it, and though it takes a little deciphering it confirms what we’d been hearing: that key Alfa products will be “Imported from Detroit” (to borrow a phrase). Here’s what we’ve been able to piece together: the 2012 models are the 4C “supercar” (note Alfa’s use of scare quotes around the term) and the Compact-Wide “C-SUV,” which will be built alongside the next-gen Jeep Compass and Patriot in Italy. Then, in 2013 the midsized Giulia sedan and sportwagon will debut, underpinned by the developed-in-Detroit next-gen 200/Avenger platform. That same year, the MiTo will gain five-door and convertible versions as well, with a more-mysterious D-SUV that will likely be closely related to the next-gen Jeep Liberty. Finally, in 2014 Alfa will update its C-segment Guilietta, at which point it should be ready for global (i.e. US-market) duty.

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Remember the Cobalt? In many markets, Chevrolet’s much-maligned small-car nameplate is not  a rolling reminder of the brand’s small-car struggles, so while the US gets a new Sonic and Cruze, other markets will get Aveo and Cobalt. Unlike the new Aveo, which is exactly the same as Sonic, this new Cobalt is probably an evolution of the previous Cobalt’s Global Compact platform, and offers engines ranging in size from 1.3 to 1.8 liters. The Cobalt is being shown at the Buenos Aires Auto Show, and will eventually be sold in South America, the Mideast, Africa and Europe. Meanwhile, GM has released no English-language presser on the debut [Spanish release here], possibly in hopes that Americans who remember the previous Cobalt’s weak reputation don’t clutter the internet with tales of their previous run-ins with the predecessor. Oops!

The BMW F10 M5 has been shot at the Nürburgring, shown as a “concept,” and has generally been exposed to expectant fans the world over. But even as it was caught prepping for US market duty in Southern California, the name of the game was “look but don’t talk.” We’ve discussed the anti-social tendencies of test mule drivers before, but for some reason it always seems to surprise the folks who come across a mule on the road. On the other hand, if you saw a brand-new M5 on the road with private plates, would you expect the driver to give you the time of day? I thought not.