Check out the ad for the new Citroen C5 above. I shall translate. "We at Citroen have a sense of humor (you see, we're not REALLY German). We are taking this new car seriously, so we are spending millions on a gorgeous campaign by ad agency EuroRSCG. This is a car for anal-retentives and it won't be unreliable. BMW has won the [carmaking] war, so all we can do is parrot/parody them. We'll do anything to promote the car, including negating what's left of Citroen's brand values (which were: hydropneumatic suspension, quirky styling, value-for-money, French esprit)." Like you, I'm amused and confused. "Vorsprung Durch Gobbledygook" or "Fahrvergnuckgnuck." Those were (kinda) OK, because they said: "We are German, but we no longer invade other countries, we just build good cars". In other words, those compaigns transported a coherent message about branding and national identity. This Citroen ad? Not so much.

Let's get something out of the way right now: the Yukon Hybrid is over-priced. Our tester stickered at $56k. At that price point, GM's gas – electric SUV competes against BMW's enlarged X5, Audi's Q7 carcoon and Lexus' golf club friendly RX 400h (to name a few). Hybrid or no, the GMC Yukon's not exactly what you'd call an upmarket machine. If The General had taken the hit and offered the Yukon Hybrid for the same price or less than its gasoline equivalent, it would be a far more compelling proposition. But they didn't. So let's press on.

California's leaders are dreaming of a biofueled future, and they see E85 ethanol as a step in the right direction… for their campaign war chests. The LA Times reports that California wants to increase the availability of the 85 percent corn-based biofuel, by earmarking $25m in grants to set up 34 new E85 refueling stations. Unfortunately for those Californians who value clean air and energy efficiency, E85 takes more (fossil) fuel to refine than it offers, actually decreases fuel efficiency and increases emissions. Pretty ironic considering that the plan is justified by the California Environmental Protection Agency's Air Resource Board as a crucial component of the state's Climate Action Plan. So why is the state of California subsidizing the infrastructure of such a short-sighted fuel product? So that people in the fuel business don't have to actually pay for it themselves, of course. Installing an E85 pump costs about $50k. As Chevron spokesman Leif Sollid puts it "our marketers and retailers have not expressed a widespread desire to install E85 at their stations." Well, of course they haven't… because they know the only way to sell an unpopular product is to get the government to subsidize it. They also know that their $50k buys a lot more value as campaign campaign contributions.

I can't remember the last time I drove a press car. Since we added the News Blog, more than quadrupling our content at a single stroke (not literally), I've had precious little time to get my running machine fixed, never mind test drive a press car. Not that carmakers are falling all over themselves making them available. TTAC is still banned from Honda, BMW, all eight brands of GM and Subaru press cars. I'm sure there are a few more that have us on their shit list (my mother's expression). But again, I'm so damn busy tapping these keys on your behalf that I don't have the time to chase PR people for "free" cars. Of course, they're not free, even when they are. Journos who accept a press car are testing a carefully prepared, non-representational vehicle. We've mentioned this before, but it was brought home to me again when Chrysler PR called me– and Chrysler PR never calls me– to find out where Michael Karesh got the leaky Dodge Journey to review. Reading between the lines, someone high up at Chrysler was pissed that we got a hold of a duff press vehicle. Which is why TTAC will continue our [originally unintentional] policy of testing production vehicles rather than press cars. This further separates our reviews from every other media outlet save Consumer Reports. Just to let you know.

Toyota will introduce two new hybrid models at the 2009 Detroit North American International Auto Show: the third-gen Prius and a new Lexus-badged hybrid. Motor Trend reports that the new Lexus will be based on the Prius platform and drivetrain, aimed squarely at the "lifestyle wagon" segment. Offering Toyota's proven Hybrid Synergy Drive in a category of small but pricey wagons (think Audi A3) seems like a smart move; the "hybrid premium" will not scare away shoppers who are already considering dropping $30k on what amounts to a compact car. Unfortunately, the artist's rendering which accompanies this announcement looks like little more than the Prius donor car. Hopefully ToMoCo will put a little more effort into the looks of the final product.

It's like Maserati read our minds. We, meaning pistonhead with a pulse, love the way Maser's new DuoPorte looks. Long, lean, sharkish, rakish, classic, chiseled, sexy, hot and on and on we could go. But with "only" 405 horses pumping-out of its detuned (and carried over) Ferrari heart, the GranTurismo was a case of more show than go. (That's less mojo than a Corvette, don't you know.) Basta! No more. Fiat's sports car group has crammed its 4.7-liter V8 under the Maser's hood, boosting power up to a highly respectable 440 hp. We like that. The transmission has also been re-jigged for faster shifts and the brakes are dual-cast (steel and aluminum) Brembos squeezed by six piston calipers. Subtle exterior and interior tweaks abound (like Poltrona Frau leather). About time too.

Nearly half of all U.S. military deaths in Iraq are caused by roadside bombs, the cobbled-together explosives known by the now-household acronym IED (Improvised Explosive Device). These homemade killers are powerful enough to launch an up-armored Humvee in the air, penetrate it and split it in half. Which is why the military is hustling to get a new generation of MRAPs– that's Mine Resistant Ambush Protected vehicles– to Iraq. The New York Times reports that 2,500 MRAPs have already been deployed; 5500 are due in theater by June. The MRAPs range in size from the four-wheeled, 40k pound "Category 1" MaxxPro, to the six-wheeled Buffalo, which sports a mine-clearing robotic arm and a 12-liter diesel International straight six (yeah, that's two liters per cylinder). With mine-resistant undercarriages, AK47 repellent windows, city bus-inspired shock absorbing driver compartments, and Corbeau four-point racing harnesses, MRAP's are considered to be 300 percent safer in an IED blast than an up-armored Hummer. Which leaves only one question: how long before one of these bad boys ends up in a rap video?

At Chicago, Hyundai showed us the Elantra Touring, which is their marketing-friendly term for hatchback or wagon or five-door. It's not just an Elantra with a hatchback though (thank goodness); it's more closely related to Hyundai's European offering in the hot C-segment category (Golf, Astra, Focus). That means the Touring has cop shocks, a cop engine… wait, wrong movie. It means it has Hyundai's firmer European suspension (about 30 percent stiffer than the U.S.-spec Elantra sedan), better springs, larger front and rear stabilizer bars, and a much more rigid body. We can only hope Hyundai improved the steering feedback from the Elantra sedan– which is so light you can steer it just by staring at the wheel and yelling "LEFT." Anyway, the Touring's exterior looks good. Check out the microsite for yourself (stupid welcome screen, lousy music alert) and tell me they're not– even a little— cribbing MINI's cheekiness.

In 2005, Mexican President Vincente Fox accelerated the opening of Mexico's markets to American used cars, allowing the free importation of American vehicles between 10 and 15 years old. In the last two-and-a-half years, an estimated three million used American cars answering to that description have found their way into Mexico. As the San Francisco Chronicle reports, the business of importing American junkers has been good to the 25k families who earn their living in the trade, but not everyone is muy alegre. Mexico's new car dealers are feeling the pinch; sales have stagnated at 1.1m per year. Sales of subcompacts have dropped over 16 percent, as Mexicans opts for cheaper, more spacious American metal. And when the Mexican car industry sneezes, American manufacturers catch a cold. GM, Ford and Chrysler are all top sellers in Mexico. They stand to lose big as the wave of American jalopies continues to take the air out of the Mexican new car market.

Yesterday we asked about new cars and which one upsets you the most. Today we'll be discussing which new car makes you the happiest. And don't say your new Honda Pilot, because even if it's true, no one cares. Nope, we're here to talk supercars. New supercars, specifically (so don't answer 959). 'Cause lets face it: 99 percent of us wish we had loads more money for the express purpose of buying a supercar. That same 99 percent is jealous of Jay Shoemaker, too. Speaking of Jay, my favorite supercar isn't the Audi R8. First of all, it looks like a bulimic dolphin, the carbon fiber side panels are lame and even though it's a mid-engined car, it boasts a grill bigger than Goldie's. Second it has the same engine as the RS4, and I like the RS4 better. I'm not going to mention Ferrari, either. Yes, yes: fast, precise, impeccably made, luxurious. It all sounds quite German to me. And no Porsche, either. Maybe at one point in time I could have gone for the Carrera GT, but the world has moved on. So has Porsche. The new Corvette ZR-1 is pretty tempting, but it's still a $100k Chevrolet. The Nissan GT-R is getting warmer but contains too many electronic shenanigans for my taste. Aston Martins are too pretty these days, what happened to the bulldogs? I'm very close to choosing the Dodge Viper SRT10 ACR, because it's just so absolutely bonkers. Truthfully, the big Dodge is the supercar I would pick if there wasn't one even more insane: the Lamborghini Murcielago LP640. It's not even symmetrical. You?

Leave it to the Brits to take traffic surveillance to the next level. Worried that drivers may be getting away with violating the car share lane (carpool lane to us Yanks), Leeds is testing a new camera system that actually detects the blood and water content of human skin to determine how many occupants are in the vehicle. BBC reports the system, developed by researchers at Loughborough University, uses two wavelengths of infrared (IR) light and special algorithms to distinguish faces and count heads. If it finds more than one, it lets the car pass. If it detects only one occupant, it takes a photo of the license plate and records date, time and speed. Developers say it's accurate 90 percent of the time– and isn't fooled by large dogs, dummies or cosmetics. They didn't say if the system could be disabled by transmitting an IR signal back at it or if heat reflections from different color cars would affect its accuracy. Or what happens when there's a small child in a carrier in the back seat that may not be in the camera's line of vision. There seems to be several questions they need to address before they start using the system to prosecute solo drivers. But where there's dosh, there's development.

In the comments section below the most recent General Motors Death Watch, natredde asserted that the series' longevity argues against its existence. “Calling it a Death Watch after having the time to write 165 articles is silly… Somehow I think being on GM Death Watch 2752 wouldn’t necessarily add a lot of legitimacy.” As a student of GM history, I’ve been keeping my own private GM Death Watch for decades. It was suspended (at number 2751) when I discovered and joined TTAC. But the challenge of adding legitimacy to number 2752 was simply too great to resist.

When American automakers want to cut costs on parts, they turn to China. When German automakers want cheaper parts, they turn to North America. Automotive News [sub] reports that German automakers are looking to buy more parts made in North America to "cope with the dollar-euro exchange rate." AN says the Germans are asking their suppliers if they can build sub-assemblies (e.g. seats) with parts bought in the "dollar-zone." That's a no-brainer for Mercedes and BMW, who assemble vehicles in North America. But the dollar – euro disparity is now so great that even Audi, who builds NA-spec models in Europe, are switching to American parts to cut costs. Does this mean we should start looking for the UAW label in German vehicles? Nope.

In spite of the way the United Auto Workers (UAW) rolled over and played dead compromised with The Big 2.8 during last year's contract talks, it isn't all sunshine and rainbows between labor and management in the auto industry. CNN Money reports that this morning, negotiations between the UAW and American Axle broke down over "major issues." American Axle produces parts for GM's full-size pickups and SUVs, so there hasn't been an overwhelming demand for their product over the past few years. Hence the parts maker's claim that their $70/hour labor costs are unsustainable. American Axle wants to cut their UAW wages to $27 to $35/hour– bringing them in line with other axle producers. Meanwhile, GM's plant in Oshawa, Ontario has about a three-day supply on axles on hand and American Axle has about a two-week supply stockpiled. So the strike won't have an immediate impact on GM's plants. However, as we've seen before, if they don't resolve the problem at this supplier STAT, it'll have a ripple effect at the truck plant that will resonate back down the supply pipelines to other suppliers.

It's a piercing glimpse into the obvious in a New York Times article without any major revelations, but it's still worth noting the human toll of Ford's shrinking market share and concomitant race to slice its labor costs. As former Detroit News writer Bill Vlasic correctly points out, "Ford’s big new push is not to sell cars. Instead, it is trying to sign up thousands of workers to take buyouts, partly by convincing them that their brightest future lies outside the company that long offered middle-class wages for blue-collar jobs." To that end, the Times embeds a happy-clappy video “Connecting With Your Future" that shows Ford's please-leave-now ex-employees that yes, Virginia, there is life after Ford. Ah, but is there life for Ford? In the middle of Vlasic's sugar coated pill run down, a quote from analyst John Casesa is like a shot to the solar plexus. "These companies are trying to do in the last 24 months what they should have done over the last 24 years,” the head of Casesa Shapiro Group says. “That’s why it’s such a shock to the system.” Just as sadly, it's come to this: "One thing Ford workers are proud of is that their buyout options are more extensive and, in some instances, better paying than those at G.M."