Our favorite climate change-denying British windbag is up to his old tricks. Recently, Jezza was out in Los Angeles where he was handed the keys to a Callaway Corvette C6. He and a friend took it to Orange County and the El Toro Airbase (where the NBC version of Top Gear is being shot) and then back up to the City of Angels. His verdict? "I absolutely bloody loved it." With 616 horsepower on tap, we're not surprised. But we're not writing this here blog because of hyper Vette. No, we're telling you about Clarkson's review because of this: "When it comes to motoring, the English language makes more sense in Albania than it does in Alabama. Almost every word in the Americans' automotive lexicon is different from ours, so when we talk about motorways, pavements, bonnets, boots, roofs, bumper bars, petrol, coupés, saloons, people carriers, cubic centimetres and corners, they have no idea what we're on about." Hey, he's taking the Mickey! That said, not only do we know what cubic centimeters are, he spelled it wrong. There's lots more piss and vinegar where that came from.
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He’s just mad he gets to live on a dark and damp island all his life!
I wouldn’t begrudge him the anti-American jibe. In a recent column he was praising our patriotism, entreprenurial spirit, and taste in burgers. In all seriousness, pride in one’s country and ribbing at the other guy go hand in hand. And what’s wrong with that?
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/comment/columnists/jeremy_clarkson/article3558638.ece
“In America, it doesn’t matter whether you are a topiarist or a hedge-fund manager, a petrol-pump attendant in Arizona or a retired Jewish lady in Miami; everyone is united by the American Way. The country is seen as a place where you can get on, where you will be rewarded for hard work, ambition and drive.”
Bitingly brilliant, that Brit:
“Oh sure, it has the same problems that beset all Vettes. A dash made from the same cellophane they use to wrap cigarette packets, a sense it’s been nailed together by apes, the finesse of a charging rhinoceros and the subtlety of a crashing helicopter.”
But his critique of the Callovette begs the question: What do the Brits have that compares?
Jag? Land Rover?
Oh yes, one set of colonists sold them to another. Jolly good, that.
And that bit about Americans believing any car can be made better by a man in a shed…
Um. Clarkson. Have you ever really owned a British car? Triumph? MG? Jag (pre Ford)?
One MUST have a shed to even keep the bloody things going.
But thanks for the link Jonny, he does make me laugh — sometimes quite out loud.
That was not an anti american jibe. Americans and English speak different languages. We are just able to understand each other most of the time.
Plus, I am still trying to figure out if this is an American Blog or an English one.
Then there’s the pronunciation issue. Jagwarr, Teeyoda, Neesarn, Hundy, Mitsuboosi, BM Dubya, V Dubya – it’s all completely mangled.
He only got one of those right. Not much of an ear.
Although, not only do we know what cubic centimeters are, he spelled it wrong.
A Metre is a unit of measurement, a Meter is something you stick coins in. I’m not 100% sure how you have a “cubic centimeter” ?
Dam, Clarkson was less than 5 miles away from me testing that thing (at el toro). That’s so cool
Loved the shout-out to us BBCA rerun devotees, not to mention the whole bloody rest of it.
He’s not exactly praising the British car industry either. For example the Bentley Arnage T was obviously British because the various bits that fit poorly in the interior and the brakes stopped working while testing.. Of course he loved that too, like the Corvette. I read and watch he’s reviews like he’s talking tongue in cheek most of the time.
I find it funny how there’s plenty of comment’s on the Times site about how ignorant and stupid he is because he said something “bad” about a country..
TomAnderson:
The BBCA episodes still miss a big chunk of the commercial free 1hr long BBC2 ones though. Yay for the torrentists (been downloading Top Gear that way for 4+ years now since series 3)
He may be making fun of us (again), but its so eloquently done and funny that I don’t seem to mind.
Anybody who thinks this was a serious jab at the breakaway republic needs to turn off O’Reilly, go drink some French curb wine and chill out.
As for metrics, they are far superior to English units. For instance, Clarkson’s “Top Gear” partner, Davey Jones, is a shrimpy 5’1″; but in metrics, he’s 1.55m. That’s like totally impressive now!
Sorry to break it everyone but Mr Clarkson spelled “Cubic Centimetres” correctly. In the UK, we spell it “Centimetre” just like we’d say “Centre”. In America, you spell it with the R and E the other way round.
And to all the people who say “Oh the British car industry is owned by foreigners”, may I remind them that Chrysler is still part owned by the Germans & GM and Ford are publicly listed companies which mean many countries could own stakes in GM and Ford. So they’re not as “American” as you think….
I think the language problem is brought simply by American’s stupidity and inability to read and think (present company excepted.) I mean, us Canadians know what Clarkson and the rest of the Brits are on about when we’re eating some crisps on the motorway with our luggage in the boot, checking under the bonnet when the 3400 cubic centimetre motor overheated. Although, Canadians between Thunder Bay and Calgary certainly don’t know what a corner is.
KatiePuckrik:
You missed the joke.
geggamoya :
April 24th, 2008 at 5:31 pm
He’s not exactly praising the British car industry either.
What British car industry? As far as I know, there is no longer a single British-owned car maker left, with the possible exception of TVR (which I can’t tell if they are still making cars or not). Of course, there are car plants in the UK owned by foreigners.
Geotpf,
We have Aston Martin back. Yes, the capital is foreign, but the name on the papers is “Prodrive”. It was established at the beginning that Prodrive would run Aston Martin and the foreigners would leave them alone.
Quite a nice relationship, really, the engineers get to make cars and the financiers get the money, everyone is happy!
Mr Lieberman, what joke?
Geotpf :
April 24th, 2008 at 6:30 pm
geggamoya :
April 24th, 2008 at 5:31 pm
He’s not exactly praising the British car industry either.
What British car industry? As far as I know, there is no longer a single British-owned car maker left, with the possible exception of TVR (which I can’t tell if they are still making cars or not). Of course, there are car plants in the UK owned by foreigners.
TVR is owned by a Russian multimillionaire.
Kit-car maker Noble is still mostly British, I believe. Might be publicly traded, but it isn’t a subsidiary of any non-British maker.
Mr Lieberman, what joke?
I’m pretty sure that his comments about the spellings were meant to be tongue-in-cheek.
Either that, or the Brits need to get a new dictionary. This is the best one, of course: http://www.merriam-webster.com/
Jagwarr, Teeyoda, Neesarn, Hundy, Mitsuboosi, BM Dubya, V Dubya
For the record, most folks I know in the States call ’em like this:
JAG-war
Toy-OH-da
NEE-san
HUN-die
Mit-soo-BEE-shee
AH-cyur-ah
I object only to Hyundai, which I pronounce Hee-YOON-die on account of my Korean friend…
Anyone across the pond care to contribute the proper (non-Clarkson) speech patterns?
AndyR:
Don’t forget — Poursh.
lol, andy, your korean friend must not be very korean. hyundai is 2 syllables: (h)yun-dé. hee-yoon-die is still way better than how Clarkson pronounces it. That man has no right to ridicule anyone’s pronunciation of anything. Except the South, which is predominantly where he gets his anti-American material. I guess he has that in common with Borat.
As for pronunciations:
Jagwarr=Jag-yu-ar. Neither is really better than the other. Awkwarrrd ‘r’ versus extraneous syllable, take your pick.
NEE-san > Nissan. Japanese pronunciation versus phonetical. authenticity wins out.
Don’t know a single person who actually says “dubya”, mitsubooshi, or teeyoda, but I can imagine parts of the country do.
Don’t forget — Poursh.
I make a habit of smacking anyone who claims an interest in cars and pronounces it like that, but fair point.
seoultrain:
hyundai is 2 syllables: (h)yun-dé
I try… :) Surely my Korean friend is pronouncing it correctly. There’s a fine line to walk in making the English sounds/letters match up with the foreign sounds… I just can’t abide the silent “Y” most folks leave out…
Ah, America… Where we change grammar on the fly to suit our needs. Thus Coeur d’Alene, Idaho becomes “Core-duh-LAYne” in Seattle (and other atrocities). Forgive the tangent – I’ll stick to cars from here on out… :)
Not sure what the ‘correct’ pronunciations are, but I’m English and pronounce them as follows. I’ll say uh when I’m talking lazily and a/ar otherwise…
Jag-u-uh
Toy-o-tuh
Niss-an
Hy-un-dye
Mit-suh-bi-shi
Ah-cyuh-ra (well, if I after needed to pronounce it)
AndyR :
I try… :)
That’s all we ask :)
Though I’ve heard so many different pronunciations that I don’t really care anymore. It’s gotten to the point where only Top Gear’s pronunciations bother me.
It’s unfortunate that Hyundai doesn’t have an easy name to pronounce like Samsung.
The National Institute of Standards and Technology is part of the US Department of Commerce. It establishes the standards of weights and measures in the US. NIST has designated the International System of Units (SI) as the official metric system. It says that the meter is the basic SI unit of length. NIST says:
“The spelling of English-language words – for example, “meter,” “liter,” and “deka” are used instead of “metre,” “litre,” and “deca” – is in accordance with the United States Government Printing Office Style Manual, which follows Webster’s Third New International Dictionary rather than the Oxford Dictionary used in many English-speaking countries. This spelling also reflects recommended United States practice.”
Aren’t you glad you asked?
As usual, Clarkson calls it like it is. As usual, his detractors seem to misunderstand him because they never regularly read his writing or follow his shows. I can’t say I disagree with any of things he wrote about Americans in his latest review.
I always get a kick out of the English equivalents for our American “medians” and “divided highways” — “central reservations” and “dual carriageways,” respectively.
I love the reference to ‘American’s deep-seated belief that all cars can be improved by a man in a shed’. That’s a fun read.
I just got new cable service and can see Top Gear for the first time. I’m noticing all the episodes are from 2006. What’s up with that?
pls in Alabama
They often repeat ones as old as 2003 round here, just the way it goes, I ‘spose.
JC is a reasonably entertaining loudmouth (as far as loudmouths are entertaining), but he damages his credibility by doing little research and making too many mistakes in his rants. At that point he is no longer biting, he is more like that uncle you are embarrassed about when he has a couple too many and starts talking.
Yeah, I like watching him from time to time, but he is to a good automotive show like Smash Lab is to Myth Busters.
I got the Impression TVR was bankrupt again
My favorite Clarkson American rant was when he was describing the weight of the 650lb outboard motor that he was bolting to the back of his hilux as just slightly heavier than the average American! LOL.
Clarkson is a disgusting example of modern humor. Insult people, countries or nationalities, then say “Just kidding”, as though that’s supposed to make everything alright. The only thing worse than that are the anti-Americans (especially anti-American Americans) that say he’s harmless. When he’s talking about cars, he’s an eloquent ambassador of car loving culture to the world. When he’s making fun of people, however, he’s just another drunk at the pub: nothing he says makes sense or should be said in anything resembling polite company.
I believe the biggest UK car manufacturer is Reliant – the company that builds cars that only have four wheels if you count the spare.