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There has been a lot of speculation why the Chinese have such a hard time exporting meaningful numbers of cars. The Chinese government even has a 7 point program to boost exports – under review. Allow me to add an eighth point to the program – after all, 8 is a lucky number in China: Find someone who writes serviceable tag-lines, in English. “Unlimited Almightyness” (a tagline for the Great Wall Hover CUV) just won’t do, unless you are advertising the pope mobile. For a free review of your taglines, give me a call. New lines at a slight extra charge.
Shocking News: Chinese are rubbish at something.
In all seriousness, though, I’m amazed that the usually clever Chinese manage to always get the simple things completely wrong.
beats the hell out of “Limited Alimightyness”
Well that explains why it hovers.
Also, is it made from bits of the Isuzu Axiom? Or is it just a photoshop of the Isuzu Axiom, and actual product will vary?
Too bad I didn’t have a camera when I saw the sign at Ningbo airport: “Animals and alcoholics must be put in checked luggage.”
Looks like current gen Toyota 4Runner + grill inspiration a la Ford Edge.
Unlimited Isuzu Axiom copyness
Dammit Seth–yours wasn’t there when I thought of it!
For more translation tomfoolery and hijinks: http://www.engrish.com/
Looks like its actually “Almightiness” no y which next to the “Freedom” seems quite ironic on Chinese.. well anything.
yes yes….Axiom body with a modified Toyota Prado front end. Actually comes off looking pretty decent, but still way too derivative.
“Unlimited Almightyness” is pretty awesome…think if someone like Joe Isuzu was selling a tagline like that. He could make it work just on it’s cheekiness. “Hover” is a terrible name, however…sounds like a vacuum or an act of foreplay.
Finally, Bertel, it’s very late (or early, depending on how you want to see it)in China…we’re not sleeping yet…shouldn’t you be?
Chuck Norris – Your ride’s here.
Looks like one of those fake Sniff Petrol ads. Not surprising to see it’s a real ad from China.
How about the Translate Server Error Edition?
To improve better at export, perhaps should hire experts from afar, like USA. They from that far, the USA, they know English more better. Not good for Chinese to write English, if selling in USA.
Confucious say, Chevy NOVA not sell good in Mexico, better to give more higher Aztec name. Like Montezuma. That one more better for selling in Mexico.
So like Mexico, better to use higher English expert for USA.
In china they do not use stars to rate crash safety. It seems they use fortune cookies. Looks like this one gets a side and rear crash rating of 1.5 fortune cookies and the front gets a 2 fortune cookie crash rating..(if the powdered latex balloon airbags decide to inflate). As for the “limo” edition they recomend not sitting in the middle since this may overstress the chassis and cause it to sag which they claim would “compromise” the vehicles handling and safety. Ah, and as for the powertrain, well, they where unable to produce their own mill that would last more that 5000 kilometers they simply asked Mitsubishi to supply their 4G64 2.4 liter 4 cylinder engines ( a mediocre powerplant at best ) probably the best (least worst) part of the HOVER.
Too bad I didn’t have a camera when I saw the sign at Ningbo airport: “Animals and alcoholics must be put in checked luggage.”
I lived and worked in Guangzhou for 3 years, from 2000 to 2003. I was the lead designer and design coordinator (on-site) for a $100 MM construction project.
My favorite Chinglish statement was an overhead road sign I passed everyday to work:
Long Dong People’s Hospital
I kid you not, you can not make this stuff up.
As Supreme Allied Commander of NATO Forces, I find this vehicle’s tagline very appealing.
That’s hilarious, and not surprising.
What IS surprising, is that the HOVER isn’t a bad looking whip.
But will it hold together when you slam the door shut?
Yet another reason why they need to buy one or more of the Detroit companies. It’s the quickest way into the US market. They need dealers, marketing people, and safety engineers among other things.
However, if they end up buying Chrysler, I’d like to be the first to recommend that they pass on having the PT Cruiser design team teaching them how to build cars that can survive collisions.
Yet another reason why they need to buy one or more of the Detroit companies. It’s the quickest way into the US market. They need dealers, marketing people, and safety engineers among other things.
I doubt that even the Red Chinese want to deal with the socialists at the UAW.
They hate us for our almightiness or something.
I may be outing myself as a Star Trek geek, but I have to comment that naming a vehicle the “Hover,” when it does not actually do so, is setting a fair percentage of viewers up for a momentary NerdGasm and then crushing disappointment.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eaiMi66DK14&feature=related
Mr. Sparkle is disrespectful of dirt!
Can you see that I am serious?
Mr. Sparkle sends dirt to the land of ghost and shadow!
Any temptation to laugh is tempered by the fact that I’ve seen what it takes to write in Chinese using a computer keyboard. Holy crap, it makes brain surgery look easy, it’s a Festivus Miracle that Chinese kids can actually learn their native language, much less sort-of-master a second one.
I dunno, if this thing actually hovers, call me Marty McFly, ‘cuz I’m mighty impressed.
There are plenty of experienced US based automotive marketing and advertising types ready and willing to work for cash money.
Why do I have a feeling if there had been a Chevy/Ford/Dodge emblem on that vehicle someone would have bitched about it being an SUV by now?
Kevin :
December 17th, 2008 at 11:36 pm
Any temptation to laugh is tempered by the fact that I’ve seen what it takes to write in Chinese using a computer keyboard. Holy crap, it makes brain surgery look easy, it’s a Festivus Miracle that Chinese kids can actually learn their native language, much less sort-of-master a second one.
Pinyin makes it easy to type Chinese nowadays on any keyboard. I bought a laptop in China and the only way you could tell was the bootlegged version of windows they loaded on there because I told them I wanted it in English. They even have something similar to T9 text prediction that allows quick input on a cell phone keypad now.
Chinese characters are generally compound characters (several simple characters put together to be a more complex one of a similar mearning) and functional literacy is about 1000 words.
Translating Chinese -> English is another story.
That truck is an Isuzu Axiom with facelifted front and rear ends.
And with 2.4Lts 4G64 Mitsubishi motor.
It’s sold here in Venezuela. One of the few chinese cars that look decent.
I would love a vehicle with unlimited almightiness. Just as long as it’s not Chinese.