My name is Robert Farago, and I used to modify my ride. Back in the day, I couldn’t afford what I really wanted to drive: a Dino. (A Pinto station wagon is about as far as you can get from a Dino whilst remaining in the same solar system that’s home to planet Earth.) So I spent my hard-earned money on Pirelli P3s. And sway bars. And God knows what. OK, a Nachamichi tape deck. Then, when I saved-up enough for a Mazda RX4, I swapped out the gearbox for the RX3’s more aggressive unit. And again. And again. RX7? Rear ribbed metal thingie over the hatch and numerous performance mods to the suspension, tires, wheels, engine and so on. Somewhere along the line I realized that no matter what I did to my car, it screwed-up something else. The manufacture spent millions achieving the perfect balance of ride comfort handling, reliability, cost, etc. Why did I think I could do better? I couldn’t. So I stopped. Whilst Mehta recovers from his coronary to pen a suitable rip-post, I’ll say this to enhance his experience: the only thing worse than a ridiculously modified car is its owner.
Sure, modded motors are an expression of the owners’ individuality. The best of the breed require tremendous mechanical skills and a vivid imagination. I admire hot rods and kit cars and race-modified cars and scissor-doored Toyotas. Truth be told, I’d give my left testicle for a RUF Porsche. And thank God we live in a free country, where car owners with little to no taste can sink billions of dollars into an endeavor which has about as much social utility as cigar smoking. Seriously. The American economy needs you! Party on Dudes.
But please don’t ask me to admire that shit. That’s what really grinds my gears. The other day, I was filling-up with high test, when a fart-canned Honda Accord with a giant wing zizzed-up next to me. As I said, fair enough. But then Sunglass Man smirked at my GL and literally patted his modified sedan. Puh-lease. At least when I was an asshole I wasn’t an asshole about it.
At the end of the proverbial English day, I’d prefer to see a well-loved example of a bone stock ride than something that’s been taken seriously sideways. Speaking of bone stock, a heavily modded car is like a T-shirt with the word “Hung” on it. Even it’s true, it’s proof positive that it doesn’t always pay to advertise. If you know what I mean.
I’ve found it important to step back and look at what I think of another’s car as my business. My business is my attitude and behavior.
I just saw a mid 80s Olds Cutlass today with like 26″ rims, I thought what a disservice that person is doing to themselves. Yet I say the same when someone buys a plain yogurt sedan, SUV, or another silver car. I’ve found that many of these people still have some fun times in their life. Hell F1 champ Lewis Hamilton drives a modded GL550. To each his own, even if that means disappointed, sad, hurt, scared, and anger I’ll feel when I see this. I need to accept others and life for what it is. Then I get to see the diverstity and complexity that the Goddess has provided me. Also that I need to focus more on my issues and enjoying my life.
That being said, my stock E34 525i had somewhat of a hard time keeping up with a stock Beetle (with 4 girls) and 05 Accord the other day. I hear mods to the suspension will make a huge difference, but then again my car is more then enough is most all situations. Sorta a difficult choice. Maintenance is a good idea, the prudent choice, but I kinda hate the thought of spending money on my car and not feeling like I’m getting what I want.
I see this sometimes:
http://www.lpcreative.net/civic/rims.jpg
What’s the point? Does it really impress your date when you hit a pothole in that thing and it knocks one of her teeth loose?
Or better yet, slammed suspension and the seat reclined as far back as it can go, does that really impress anyone?
“The manufacture spent millions achieving the perfect balance of ride comfort handling, reliability, cost, etc. Why did I think I could do better? I couldn’t.”
+ 1,000,000,000,000
This is my main argument against mods. A sway bar here or there is okay but the car company that built the thing spent tons of money and there were literally thousands of experts who had input into making the design exactly right. Modding just disrupts the purity of the original machine.
There are certain things that are perfectly fine…if you have a BMW for instance and swap the wheels for any of the millions of alternate BMW wheel designs available, or take badges off, or something else tasteful, it’s okay. Chrome spinners or fake plastic fender vents on anything but a Buick or fart cans just make me want to throw rocks at the owner.
On a Mazda3 forum I’ve seen some 3s that are probably in pristine condition, or would be if the owners hadn’t stripped the door surrounds of their black trim for that wonderful “stripper Corolla CE” look and then added chrome-plated door handles. Makes me sad but I also appreciate my completely unmodded 3 alot more because of it.
But what can we do about the distinct lack of venti-ports on modern cars?
Buick-schmuick, every car needs AT LEAST 3 or 4 aftermarket stuck-on faux venti-ports on each front fender. Totally classy!
And way oversize rims on total beaters…and dark/blacked out tailight lens covers, which make a car almost impossible to see at night…and banner graphics on your windshield which helpfully let us all know you are proud to drive a HONDA or a CHEVY…and, and, and..
Just say no!
While I agree with Robert in principle, the argument that car manufacturers by definition get it right does not quite hold – they get it right in a cost constrained environment. They get the compromise right for most people but not necessarily for all customers.
In the end, there are mods and there are mods. Putting better brakes on a BMW will not make it any worse, in fact it’s probably worthwhile encouraging. Equally, getting rid of all season rubber on any car and replacing it with proper summer / winter tyres depending on season. I personally tend to have a problem with visual mods, as most of them do not improve aerodynamics over stock.
And there I completely agree with Robert – massive wheel sizes, spoilers, etc. please please just say no!
Bad taste is horrendus and you see it everywhere only to ignore it, but somehow automotive bad taste is just offensive and extremely obvious.
i was never hugely into modding my cars. wheels, exhaust & lowering is about as far as i go. then after spending thousands on a car and trading it for half what i paid 18 months earlier (it turned out to be a POS with ongoing problems that couldn’t be solved), i decided there really is no point. a nice stereo and some decent tires is my limit these days.
what really makes me mad/sad, is when you try and look for an old stock standard M-B, BMW, LS400 etc and it’s virtually impossible to find an unmolested example. in these cases, the standard car is worth more than the one that’s had thousands spent on it
My pet peeve – the vinyl roof.
Huh, I didn’t know they made that car in a convertible version…oh wait, it’s just a “landau” roof. Tacky. Ruins perfectly good luxury cars and looks even more ridiculous on a Chevy, etc.
sfdennis1 +1
I hate those stupid fake ventiports.
The really sad thing is that all the people spending thousands of dollars tarting up their POS with 20″ wheels, etc. are the first people to bitch about gas prices.
An RX-7 with an LS1 is way better in terms of reliability and performance than what the stock rotary offers. Just saying…rotaries suck dude.
The manufacture spent millions achieving the perfect balance of ride comfort handling, reliability, cost, etc.
It depends on the manufacturer. Speaking from direct experience, for some brands, this sentence could read:
The manufacture spent millions achieving consensus from the clueless executives’ compromise of various departments’ obligations of: ride comfort handling, reliability, cost, required supplier/UAW use, required region sourcing, timeline-forced cancellation of fixing problems before production, and nervous attempts to create a great Consumers Reports score above all else, etc.
Sad. Very sad.
So the moral of the story is: Some cars (if a diamond in the rough) you can tweak from mediocity into a tangent of an area (like handling, accleration) that you like.
Body mods – I could never figure out why someone driving a car with a theoretical top speed of…115 would put a giant wing on to reduce that speed to 87 never mind the reduced traction to the driven (front) wheels. I guess they don’t teach high school physics anymore.
Brake mods – IMHO – can improve safety – as can suspension mods (though that can certainly go the other way too).
Tires, I think, are the first thing to change out from what the OEM specifies.
While I agree that a lot of mods are pointless and tacky (the ventiports are a big pet peeve of mine, and if you are going to put them on, at least do it right and have the number of ports reflect the number of cylinders in your engine – I know your Chevy Cobalt doesn’t have a V8 in it), there are some I do find acceptable. As Kristjan said, car designers are constrained by a number of factors including cost of the final product. Superior brakes, a sway bar, or even a tasteful aftermarket exhaust and cold air intake kit can improve performance without destroying the inherent balance of the car.
Some cars also just beg to be modded. While a slammed Civic with a fart can and spinners is ridiculous, a Mustang with a cat-back and an OEM approved supercharger is a different story.
I don’t get the aftermarket rims thing on most cars. Perhaps in the 80s and 90s when factory wheels were often truly ugly it made sense, but these days the factory wheels look nicer on the car than 90% of the aftermarket stuff available. I truly hate the ‘deep dish’ wheel look, where the spokes are recessed several inches from the outer edge of the wheel, who thinks that looks good?
I think in most cases, there is something else better/faster/cheaper than trying to throw more $ into an existing car.
I know a lot of guys in the sportbike world throw extra $$ on exhaust, or special LED turn signals, etc etc, but I don’t get why.
You can almost double your horsepower at purchase time for an extra $2g or so. Buy the bike you want in the first place.
For cars, I really don’t see the point either. You don’t get any extra $ or consideration from resale, and unless you track it, most mods are a waste of money.
I actually stay away from cars & bikes that have been modded as a possible on a used purchase, unless it’s something like a stereo, and I don’t put into my consideration anyways (I don’t listen to radio/music when I drive).
Waste of time, waste of $.
With that being said, assuming you aren’t annoying anyone (I’m looking at you straight-pipe-bikes & fartcan cars), it’s a free country. I still think it’s ultimately silly & a waste of $.
I’m Rod Panhard, and I LOVE Faux-ventiports. Yup, I do, because every time I see them, I think of my Pappy. His name was Earl, Earl Philter.
Earl served in Uncle Sam’s Navy, in the Big One in ’42. Back when he was a pup, Buicks were a luxury car. And when Earl earned enough scratch, he bought himself a 1970 Buick Electra 225 Limited. This was after he recovered financially from a divorce where is soon-to-be ex-wife got the Delta 98.
Anyway, back to the Deuce & a Quarter. It had the faux ventports as badges on the side of the hood. And one day, Earl told me that back when he was a pup, bored kids on the streets of the Illinois factory town where he grew up would pee in the vent holes, sort of like those water gun games at carnival midways.
I laughed at the story and went on about my youth. And one day, about 30 years later, I heard the same story, from another guy, about Earl’s age, who grew up somewhere else.
So as far as I’m concerned, yeah, the more ventholes the better. I’ll always think of my pappy Earl when I see ’em, too.
By the way, LeSabres had three ventholes per side. Electras had four.
Well engineered, carefully thought out and fully developed mods are not a bad thing. They are, however, depressingly rare. The vast majority of modifications make a vehicle which in the end is worse than it started.
There are, however, some areas where many vehicles can be subtly improved. Better shock absorbers can improve many a GM vehicle. Heavier sway bars work magic on classic RWD Volvos (IPD is the place to go for those). Carefully chosen improved tires (typically in stock or near stock sizes) can improve many, but not all, vehicles.
But such things are the exception. The vast majority of modifications owners do to their cars and trucks would be better off never done. But then who would advertise in the car magazines?
I suspect that much of the animus towards modified cars comes from people with too little imaginiation and too little skill to properly modify their own ride.
A well-done street rod can be a thing of beauty. A Chevy Caprice with shorter springs, black paint, and 17 inch wheels is a huge improvement over stock. But then, the factory thought so too, and created the Imopala SS after the hot rod community had made more than a few on their own.
Careful body modifications enhance the original design without losing the theme. Choosing wheel and tire sizes to complement the theme can only improve the car.
So many compromises are inherent int he design of a car that there is always room for improvement.
Bob
The engineering of anything (including cars) is a compromise. Making compromises to create a product will inherently disappoint some portion of the intended market.
Can an owner do better than the OEM’s engineers? Given the presumed level of (in)competence of some current OEM’s engineering I would say it’s possible. How many reviews or comments about vehicles do you hear that take the tack of “it’s overall a really good vehicle but if they would just ____ it could be great.” That’s where the aftermarket comes in; trying to fill in that blank.
That said, the best mods are the ones you can’t spot (or possibly hear) from 20 yards away.
Actually, I love car mods. Yes, some cars can be overdone a little. But overall, I can appreciate someone spending money to make their car their own.
What if I want the small-engined Mini Cooper for fuel economy but decide to add lowering springs and better wheels because I want it to handle? That’s not so bad is it?
To me, the overdone body kits are silly, as are 26″ spinners and vinyl roofs. Or, the open exhausts on pickups which aren’t performance cars to begin with. But still, to each his own.
I know that for the most part, the ricer crowd hangs a rear spoiler on their fwd cars for looks. But, they do actually serve a purpose for racing. When you build a fwd race car, you try to get rid of understeer by swapping in very stiff rear springs (1100 lbs/in to 2000 lbs/in). This basically makes the car want to oversteer in anything but a straight line, but makes it easy to drive the car “loose” around corners. A rear spoiler adds more weight onto those rear wheels and give you more grip for the high speed turns and makes it a little more stable.
RF, weren’t you looking at an IS-F recently? That’s not really a tastefully done car is it? Reminds me a lot of the ricer cars…
The older I get, the more of an OEM type of guy I find myself becoming, too.
Robert’s point about modifying one thing and screwing up another is probably more the rule than the exception these days. My ’97 T-Bird had some amazing grip with the fat, sticky 17″ wheels and tires I installed; however, the new-found grip quickly introduced me to new-found body roll as the stock spring and shock combo was meant to play nice only with my skinny OEM 15’s.
At the same time, the rear air shocks I put on my non-factory-air-suspensioned Panther represents a terrific, no-downsides modificaiton. Costing less than $60, they are fully adjustable for when I need the car’s rear end higher (I pull a small trailer several times per week), they have zero effect on ride and handling (unless I over-inflate them) and they’re probably five times more reliable than Ford’s optional load-leveling rear air suspension.
So, on the whole, I’d say that in most cases modifications tend to be net negative (economically, and in many other ways), but at the right time, for the right application, when selected properly and installed correctly, they can have the potential to improve an OEM design without causing any other problems.
DWI/DUI-type penalties should be levied upon owners who install any device that causes a vehicle to make excessive noise without any increase in horsepower. Yeah, Mr. Fartcan…I’m talkin’ to YOU. The visual abominations are tolerable, but it’s not always possible to get away from the noise.
V6 makes a good point about the slim number of unmolested older Benzes, BMW’s and Lexuses out there, but have you ever tried to find an unmodified, used Jeep Wrangler? Almost impossible.
And the banker in me agrees 100% with Robstar: I’ve always felt it better to take the money you’ll spend on mods and buy what you want in the first place. Or at least take the additional dollars to buy a higher-level model. You’ll get at least some of it back at resale time (or sell it quicker) than would be the case with something of your own creation.
Robert,
I mostly agree with you. There is not a single visual modification that I like. However, I have modified the suspensions in my past cars, simply to correct handling deficiencies.
I drove a Cavalier Z24 in high-school – god was that thing front heavy. Springs, dampers, and roll bars at least made it plow through corners less.
My 2000 Golf 1.8T was another case of “I should have bought the GTI”. I didn’t so springs, dampers, and roll bars went into that one as well.
Recently (now that I have a bit more money) I’ve found that when you move up the manufacturer’s food chain, the cars are set up much better from the factory.
I didn’t modify my 2007 G35 at all, and I didn’t touch my 2008 GTI at all. Both were setup wonderfully from the factory.
Mods have their place, but money is better spent buying the right car in the first place.
-ted
This country was founded on the principal that if a citizen doesn’t feel the stock speakers in his 1978 Impala adequately convey the bass mood of your typical Dr. Dre song, or his stock wheels don’t provide the right accent to his rust spots, he has the RIGHT to add a monstrous sub-woofer and rent-to-own phat dubs to bring it all out…..
Curmudgeons who don’t like it, don’t have to look. (But you may have to LISTEN…..)
Just sayin’….
“a Mustang with a cat-back and an OEM approved supercharger is a different story.”
That it is.
Just know that the more you modify a car… the more you will have to modify the car. A few small mods are ok but once you get into the “huge turbo” zone then say goodbye to your transmission, axles, etc.
The sad part of this is, when these people with their 22″ wheels, modified exhausts, lowering kits, etc, etc on their cars want to sell or trade it in, they are going to find that they have just thrown that money away. They will never recover it cause dealers want a trade in to be as close to factory as they can get. People looking for a used car aren’t going to buy something that looks like a ‘tuner’ owned it. Nothing against ‘tuners’, but that’s just the way it is.
I don’t modify my cars. It’s not that I wouldn’t, it’s just that I’m past that phase of my life and I just don’t see the cost/benefit. Same goes for my motorcycles. Aside from adding a luggage rack mount for my Ventura rack-pack and a Corbin seat (stock seats are almost always garbage) my bikes are stock.
Having said that, is it surprising that other people have different tastes and goals? Each of us has our little quirks. I’m about to buy a new table saw despite the fact that I already have a tool that will do that job. Why? Because I want to to. It’s one of my hobbies and I have absolutely no expectation of either getting my money back or justifying it in any practical way. It’s purely for the joy of the experience.
I suspect that the real issue here is that unlike any stationary expression of one’s personality/bad taste/more money than brains, cars invade the personal space of others. It’s easy enough to avoid the house with the excessive topiary, but when one is stuck at a light next to some rolling abortion, it tends to be hard to bear. Worse, when the visual experience matches up with a dangerous lack of skills behind the wheel, it really tends to grate. For example, I automatically assume that any visually modified 3-series BMW is being driven by a dangerous idiot.
Kristjan Ambroz,
Well said. Thanks.
—
rdodger,
If it looks like “tunerz” have had a go at it, people will, reasonably enough, suspect abuse.
—
The unintentionally funniest ad campaign I’ve seen in a long time was Chrysler’s recent ads exhorting potential 300 customers to “make it your own” by customizing it. As rdodger pointed out, that’s not going to help the resale value any and, it struck me the first time I saw the ad, for the cost of a 300 and the mods to “make it your own,” one could actually buy a good car.
I’ve always been a stock, OEM type of guy. It’s interesting that V6 and BuzzDog mentioned those specific cars–I’m 25, but my daily drivers are both unaltered, unmolested, and un-“pimped”. One is a 1991 M-B 420 SEL and the other is a 1999 Jeep Wrangler Sahara.
It’s not that I don’t have the money, it’s just that I like them better stock, knowing that I haven’t changed anything that the engineers worked so hard to perfect (within budget constraints, of course). There’s another benefit–being completely original, that also helps what little resale value they have left.
Cars are an expression of their owner’s personality. If your personality is best expressed by a fart can, go for it.
This complaint about modding has been around since the first kid tore the fenders off a ’32 Ford.
As for the OEM issues, as noted those guys are massively constrained, mostly by cost. If an owner is willing to remove some of those constraints they can do “better” in a sense – trade handling for harsher ride and NVH, trade fuel economy for power, etc.
When I was a kid in grade school I modded my bicycle to the max. Back in those precambrian days, when the closest thing to the World Wide Web were the advertisements at the back of comic books, and my means of production was limited to a weekly allowance, trading with neighborhood kids and finding things abandoned as scrap, I made whatever mod I possibly could.
But when I grew up, got a job and a credit score, I began buying what I really wanted in the first place.
So today the only mods that I make are limited to things in the manufacturers parts or accessories catalogues. Those, and things like 3M Paint Protection Film or Scotchguard, are pretty much the max for me.
However, the bigger question is safety. With all of the hullabaloo about Toyota’s floor mats, who is liable for for the myriad of after market crappy mats jamming up the world’s accelerator pedals?
Whose crash tested a car with scissor door hinges?
Who validated that set of double dubs on a Chevy Nova to make sure the increased unsprung and rotating mass doesn’t yank the spindles off the steering knuckle?
Who ever tested and approved, let alone aimed, those ultra bright headlights blinding me nightly?
And whose insurance pays for the replacement of all this after market dreck in the event of a collision or theft?
Just asking.
A couple of people have mentioned that, for a bit more money, one could actually have a good car.
But the reality is that not everyone sees the value in having a good car. That’s what has kept Jaguar in business for years.
Beautiful? Check. Performs well? Check. Wonderfully finished? Check. Good to live with on a daily basis? Not unless you have two: One to drive, and one to stay in the shop.
Sort of reminds me of why most men don’t marry “working girls”…many of the same maintenance issues.
People looking for a used car aren’t going to buy something that looks like a ‘tuner’ owned it. Nothing against ‘tuners’, but that’s just the way it is.
It is indeed.
I learned the adage “the more you modify the more you have to modify” when I was in my 20’s. First because I came of age in the 70’s and everyone my age wanted to jack the rear of their car up and put extra wide tires on it. As ridiculous as it looks now we thought it was cool. Till I discovered that it threw my brake balance, my headlights, and even the float level on the carburetor off. I wanted to be cool, not dead. After a few terrifying moments (the worst of which was discovering what its like to have the rear tires on a rear wheel drive car aquaplane while the fronts are not) with my jacked Mercury I put it back the way it was.
The second phase of learning this adage was living in Germany for three years. Surrounded by wonderful little european coupes of the era; I desperately wanted to modify the engines for that extra bit of speed on the ‘Bahn.’ However wiser men than I prevailed, I was required by law as I recall to modify the brakes and suspension in accord with any increase in horsepower. Which of course exceeded my budget and burst my dreams as well.
Fast forward 20+ years, I’ve said yes to my own children using my unmolested Mustang as a school car. To the wet dreams of ‘mods’ my answer was ‘you can’t do anything to the car that can’t be undone in a couple of hours.” Right now they’re of the opinion that the only fart can around is me. So be it. Despite many explanations they still don’t understand ‘its only original once.’ They’ve tried to make me feel guilty, but then I see a gen 3 Eclipse with fake venti-ports or a Civic making sparks as it bounces through an intersection and my resolve is unshaken. These things shall pass.
I went to a BMWCCA track event after I bought a 325 several years ago. One of the noobs like me asked an instructor what he should modify on his car first, and which investments would best improve the handling on the car. The instructor came back with, “Modify the driver. That’s the best investment you can make to improve the handling of your car.”
I couldn’t help myself with my RX-4, either. A rear sway bar and Bilsteins made it feel faster and ride rougher. Great car, otherwise!
The one exception I might make is a decent exhaust system, without expecting any power increase. Sometimes it’s nice to hear more than a whoosh when you open the throttle.
Another “if it ain’t broke” example: my son tried some tweaks to his WRX, including a less-restrictive air filter and accompanying housing. The check-engine light started blinking after a few miles, with a computer check of the error code revealing lean-burn. Probable cause: the assembly included a shiny aluminum tube that replaced the OEM plastic duct. The metal duct got hot via conduction from the engine, causing the airflow sensor to see what looked like not enough volume. Hence, it called for less fuel and the resulting leaner mix. Why? The sensor measures inlet air temp to help determine the optimum fuel mix; too warm feels like not enough oxygen. Re-installing the plastic housing returned the operation to correct behavior. The metal housing was probably fine for racing, since there would be a steady stream of cool air through it. In traffic, the airflow didn’t keep it cool enough.
That eight-wheeled Cadillac is super cool, but sixteen venti-ports would make it just perfect. And if there’s enough room on the back bumper, dual Continental spare tires would look sharp.
Oh, and a serious question. If your car has a five-cylinder engine, are you supposed to put three venti-ports on the left fender and two on the right, or vice-versa? Or, since the engine is an in-line configuration, should all five be added to one fender, and if so, which side?
In my neck of the woods, the modified ricer has given way to the modified “offroad” pickup. Super tall suspension kits, straight pipe exhaust, and 30″+ tires are all the rage. The fartcan and whale wing are annoying and stupid looking, but at least when it pulls up next to you at the stop light its exhaust tip isn’t at eye level.
I’d been looking for new material for an Editorial, thanks Robert!
The cool thing about mods is that they can sustain your interest in your car long enough to put you in a financial position to replace it. I replaced my shift knob with an aluminum cue ball and fell in love with the car all over again. Same with the blue LED’s I replaced all the interior light with. I think they make my car look like a high-end vodka bar, even though my wife thinks they make it look like a pimpmobile.
Boff, Can you tell me where you got the aluminum cue ball?
SheriffBooth: “The (ricer) fartcan and whale wing are annoying and stupid looking, but at least when (the ricer) pulls up next to you at the stop light its exhaust tip isn’t at eye level.”
Nor is the bumper aimed at your temple. Vehicles like that are why I gave up my operational, worthless, very cost-effective but tiny Aspire (I should have christened it “The Steven Lang”). Rolling up next to one of those bad-ass pickups was just too unnerving. Especially when some drivers were, visibly, on the phone and, statistically, texting.
Do many of your neighbors go in for the vertical pipes with the flapper valve tops?
I ran across an excellent example of such as you describe just the other day, powered by a diesel equipped with vertical pipes and, by the sound of it, almost no muffler at all. It’s name was “Smoker” or some such and, sure enough, when he goosed it, black smoke streamed out of the exhaust. Quite picturesque.
I hope his engine seizes.
Soon.
Could never figure out why some sink a ton of money into modifying a car when one that the manufacturer engineered to do what they want is obtainable for the same total cost or very little more.
You guys are too quick to judge others. Some modified cars aren’t to most people’s tastes – so what? Modifications are a great way to make an inexpensive car handle well, go fast, and drive nicely for a lot less money than some overpriced exotic. In the hands of a good welder, modified cars can be a true work of art (think of some beautiful 1932 Ford roadsters). As an added benefit, simple modifications help to give people hands on mechanical experience. I have more respect for someone who puts their hard work an efforts into a modified hot rod than some rich jerk who dumps his windfall profits onto a Porsche or Lamborghini and calls himself a “car guy”.
I wonder how many people have tried to trade in their modified cars and had the dealer ask them The Question: How much will it cost me to put it back to stock?
I had a modified 1971 Dodge pickup for a while. This rig had the entire drive train, front suspension and subframe, instrument panel, steering column and wheel, and gas tank from a 1974 Custom Newport. The guy did what most of those guys didn’t do, and painted the truck and finished the interior. It was a cool-looking truck that would haul ass and since it was lighter than the Chrysler had been, its load carrying capacity wasn’t hurt in spite of its lower stance from the car suspension.
I found out that it was invisible at cruise nights and such events though. Guys would look at the car on one side, walk right by my truck, and look at the car on the other side. The few guys I knew who liked it, really liked it though.
As rdodger pointed out, that’s not going to help the resale value any
See, that’s a problem right there. Buy a car because you’re going to use the whole car, not because you’re worried about resale value. I buy a car to keep it. They last longer than you think.
I agree wholeheartedly, but with reservations. I utterly despise ricer/pimper/showboating crapboxes with hideous cosmetic appointments and ill-thought out “performance” mods (the usual coffee-can exhaust, giant wing, body kit, chopped springs, way too big rims). These are ruined cars, the dynamics are buggered and you look like a tool to boot. Then you have the grenade set who mod their engines beyond a reasonable point and without any considerations of driveability or reliability, creating the buzz-time-bomb that will sooner throw a rod than lay down a decent quarter.
BUT
There is something to be said for a nice sleeper hot rod, a outwardly-stock vehicle that has lots of worthy work done to the insides. By this I mean professional suspension work, upgraded driveline, carefully thought-out engine work. An ECU chip does not a sleeper make. A twin-turbo with methanol injection (taken from the washer fluid reservoir!) with a manual transmission conversion (when the factory never sold a manny), and no cosmetic mods – that’s a sleeper.
And I have a lot of respect for people who effectively build their own cars from various bits and pieces. Look up the 450SX/450ZX for a good example – taking a Q45 V8, heavily modifying it, then shoehorning it into a 240SX or 300ZX (and in one case, a 240Z). It sounds half-baked, but the results are pretty amazing because the conversion REQUIRES a lot of forethought and work to do at all. It’s not a typical “swap engine, here’s your deathtrap” project.
Ha!
Last week a small Asian car pulled up next to me at a light. The owner had glued fake venti-ports on the side. Each set had four ports. Fine… but this is what made me laugh.
He had 2 sets on each side. I did the math. 16 ports total. So you are telling me you have a 16 cylinder motor under that little hood?
The second set on each side was on the door. Yea, you run your exhaust through the door panel?
And the icing on the cake…. he had them all facing backwards. He had put them on upside down. I guess he thought they were air scoops.
Oh, those add-on spoilers! My favorites are the home-made ones, cut or beaten out of sheet aluminum, and sharp enough — should there be an accident — to bisect a whole row of overweight grannies waiting at a bus stop.
The rule is as follows: the more a vehicle has been customized, the lower the IQ of the driver. This observation explains why customized vehicles are invariably driven so badly: unsignaled lane changes, weaving in and out of traffic, tailgating, and so on. In a truly civilized society the police would have powers of summary execution for such offenses, and the bodies of these morons would lie decaying beside the road as a warning to other motorists.
The only vehicle I’d ever modify is a Jeep Wrangler (which actually I do modify as my list goes on and on). But then it’s not a daily driver, but a weekend wheeler to go places where stock Jeeps don’t usually/ easily go. It is truly amazing at the after-market support for Wranglers!
Now for my daily driver a Honda, modifying that is using Mobil 1 oil and filters. And next new tires (lol).
I don’t disagree that people modify their cars in ways that cheapen the vehicle (big wings on Honda Civics, fake exhaust port decals, etc). But that’s not really what I would consider a mechanically “modified” car. At least, it’s a “poorly modified” car. Many people who make performance modifications to their car actually improve the driving dynamics of an otherwise mundane car. Superchargers, better brakes, better suspension – nothing wrong with any of that.
An RX-7 with an LS1 is way better in terms of reliability and performance than what the stock rotary offers. Just saying…rotaries suck dude.
Possibly, but I seriously question the longevity of an LS1. 302 Ford would be a better choice.
Like all things in life moderation and a sense of aesthetics are the keys here.
“Bone stock” is usually never the ne plus ultra of the car’s design because the factory makes compromises constantly. Witness the transformation of damn near every concept car to the production model. What starts out looking amazing gets compromised into blandness at some point. Performance compromises. Parts Bin compromises. Safety Regulation compromises. Cost compromises.
As such I’m OK with modification provided it is done in moderation and with a sense of aesthetics in-line with the original designer’s intentions. If somebody can look at the car and say “I can’t tell what you’ve done, but it looks better” then you have done it right. If all you see are the mods then you’ve done it wrong.
Here’s an example: On my E-type Jaguar the factory installed rim-laced wire wheels. They have a very “vintage British” look that is more appropriate on an MG or big Healey than on the iconic XKE. Replace them with Borrani or Dayton center-laced wires and the look of the car improves significantly without really making any large or obvious modification. In fact only a Concours Judge would spot them (and some might even miss them!) Fender flares or a big wing would utterly destroy the beauty of this car however.
It’s all about moderation.
–chuck
@ Rod Panhard (13th comment)
Great story!!! I made cruiserline ventiports out of magnetized white material for my ’99 Accord. Probably one of a handful of Hondas with cruiserline ventiports in the whole country.
But I agree with RF’s general point. I considered getting 16″ wheels for the Accord (it has 15s), but ultimately decided against it, for the kinds of reasons he articulates.
My latest favorite are junk cars with the “Dub” look…early 80’s Cutlass Supremes, Monte Carlos, and Caprices are the worst.
My Rule: If your wheels cost more than your car, you’re a Loser.
I drive a ’98 GTI VR6 every day. There’s no way I could have put 165K on it without making some changes (bought it used with 37K on it). I like the way it handles, and the ride is accptable anyway. To me it looks better with 16″ wheels and a slightly lower stance. Even lowered, it goes through all kinds of snow with Blizzaks on 15″ stock rims. Having said that, no wings, scoops or badges were used to modify this car.
My wife’s Benz has 197K on it, and no mods whatsoever. So I can do it. When it comes time to replace the GTI, I’ll look for something that’s perfect right out of the box. Modding is great fun when you’re young, but I’m getting too old for this.
I spend a lot of time around cars but the ones that really capture my personal interest are bone stock rides.Then I write about all sorts of personal choices and resist the WTF urge. http://www.mystarcollectorcar.com/
I’m in general agreement w/ Robert, though I do appreciate “OEM-plus” effort. Some cars that leave the factory would have been great if not for bean counting shortcuts.
To wit, Mark IV GTIs have inadequate suspensions. Hello, aftermarket springs, struts. SAAB NG900s were built on lame chassis and have monster torque steer. Hello SAAB Rescue Kit with steering rack clamp/brace, better springs & struts, rear swaybar and six point subframe brace. These types of “OEM-plus” mods – mods which have practical application – are IMHO good investments that bring otherwise flawed rides up to their full potential.
So you like well-executed modifications and don’t like those that aren’t. If the Fart-Can Man actually riles you up, you may have anger issues. Better to laugh at the ridiculous than to be offended by it.
For my part, I feel all cars should be modified with an LS7 engine swap. Cargo vans, the SMART, whatever. LS7.
While the global phenomenon (and associated bravado) of young men ricing up Japanese and Korean cars has always been a mystery to me, there are some (invisible) mods that are worthwhile.
For example, fitting anti-sway bars to the stock Subaru XT Forrester really improves the driving experience.
Throwing away your BMW (or any other) run-flats is also one of the best mods you can make.
By not modding your Mustang GT suspension and engine, you’d be missing the entire point of Mustang ownership.
Likewise, ECU mods for force-fed engines usually yield good returns without messing up the look of the car.
Blue neon lights on the underside of a mid 90s Civic? Not so much.
I’m with @edgett here…
My mechanic has a blog and says basically the same thing here: http://sandiegobmw.wordpress.com/2009/07/09/bmw-modifications-do-this-first/
That said, I occasionally consider doing some suspension mods to my Miata, but the more I dig into it it seems that anything beyond a better set of shocks and good summer tires is going to be overkill and kill the ..umm… balance unless I become an auto-x’er. It’s always hilarious to see a 2200 lb miata rocking 18″ wheel and tire combos that must at least double the unsprung weight and make the ride a dentist’s dream… I won’t even get into the wing on a car that maxes out at about 115 mph (less with the top down)
Link
There is nothing funnier than seeing a massively jacked-up, lift-kitted pickup tip over. Side to side. Backwards is even better.
Everyone needs to see the “Will” reading at the end of Grand Torino.
SV :
October 12th, 2009 at 2:42 am
“The manufacture spent millions achieving the perfect balance of ride comfort handling, reliability, cost, etc. Why did I think I could do better? I couldn’t.”
In the case of the caddy pictured I think they spent $20.00 figuring out how to glue chrome to plastic, In this example I think the owner fully realized the intent of the car.
But seriously folks: a lot of things we see on cars now were first done by modders. Metal Flake paint comes to mind.
Regarding todays mods, it’s no different than a chopped and channeled Mercury; time gives things a patina. I was at a show recently with almost all japanese mods (and a few dodge magnums curiously) and it was pure fun. Nothing says love more than a blue and white snakeskin interior with a death skull motif.
At the Home Depot this weekend my sons and I were waling in the parking lot and a lowered 80’s vintage cavalier with a huge double wing, front spoiler, side skirts, two sets of fog lights, a fart can and a fake hood scoop rolled slowly by. You could see the kid driving smirking like he thought he owned the world. All three of us bent over laughing hysterically at the sight. You should have seen the drivers face fall! And it was lime green to boot.
I’ve frequently remarked to my friends about people who drive $400 cars that have fart-cans and $2000 worth of wheels and tires.
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What’s missing in most of these mods is: Study, research, details, sophistication, design training and Restraint.
-Especially the Visual mods. Perhaps 1% of the purely visual ones actually make the car look better.
It’s usually quite clear these guys don’t have full-time jobs as designers.
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@Detroit-X: Exactly. The car was engineered by accountants across a broad application range -To A Price-.
@keepaustinweird: NAILED it!! THAT is the mental schema to use. OEM+
Find the small adjustments you can make.
If what you’re doing is 1/3-50% of what others have done, and Better-But-Just-Imperceptible as @Chuck said, then you win.
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+and agreed on the Resale. Outlandish upgrades == beaten-on like Rashad Evans fighting Lyoto Machida.
~Mostly Tuners buy tuner cars; because they understand the upgrades + sourcing for replacement parts, etc.
++And they also understand how the car’s been treated.
+2 Kristjan Ambroz
Tires can be the greatest performance improvement one makes to a vehicle – and you have to replace them at some point, so why go cheap? I had to ride in my staff person’s ’04 9-3 on a 200 mile road trip with some horrendous Kumhos that vibrated and roared. I asked how he picked the tires (they were replaced a month ago) he said “they were cheap”. Well, they also were uncomfortable, noisy, and handled like slop.
I also agree with the cost constraints – since new, my Contour SVT had a creaky rear suspension. Although Ford paid stealerships 8 times to replace and lube the rear sway bar bushings, they would not pay to replace the rubber ones (which kept wearing out besides being noisy) with urethane ones (which cost about $5 more aftermarket). As soon as the car was out of warranty, I replaced them and haven’t heard a peep in the past 6 1/2 years.
There is no way in Hell that I’m not giving the G8 an aftermarket exhaust setup.
Now my plan to put a “Screaming Chicken” decal off a 2nd gen Firebird on its hood might grind a few gears…
Anti modification snobbery, what’s next, driving a Porsche?
Get a Miata, or any car, on an autox course and you’ll quickly find that most, if not all, benefit from better tires, better dampening, more reponsiveness etc.
Manufacturers tune their cars so that they are safe for middle aged farts that don’t know how to drive. If that’s how you like them, well….:-)
It’s not your car unless you built it yourself. (Adding a wing, aftermarket taillights, a cold-air intake and a bunch of stick-on crap does not entitle one to say “I built it myself”.)
Don’t make any aesthetic mods to a car that you expect to sell in the future. If you personalize a car in ways that aren’t easily reversible, don’t expect anyone to share your tastes.
As usual, +1 Chuck Goolsbee
Robert – you fail to acknowledge the fact that while auto makers spend millions on their vehicles to get then “perfect”, they also buy the cheapest parts that will get the job done.
There’s often LOTS of room for improvement – example, Bilsteins ride better AND improve handling. Good tires can improve ride and grip as well. A stainless steel exhaust with mandrel bends and slightly larger piping can improve flow, lighten weight, and retain stock noise levels.
Lightweight wheels improve acceleration, braking, handling AND fuel economy.
Etc etc etc.
Nakamichi tape deck, sweet!
I am shopping for a fun second car right now, and I skip the ads for any modified vehicles. As such, ads like this (just a made-up example) make me weep:
“I bought this 2006 Mitsubishi Evolution IX bone stock, and have done the following (huge list of mods) in the last 1000 miles. Now I have to sell it.”
Mod + keep makes sense if that’s your thing, but mod + sell seems like such a losing proposition.
@ Gunit…
Agreed. A wise man once said to me: OEMs set up their cars to understeer, on the premise that if you understeer off the road, that’s your fault (going too fast for the conditions and all that) whereas if you oversteer off the road, well that’s the car’s fault.
You may not like the results, but the owner may have spent hundreds of hours working on the mods and has the right to take pride in them. Can’t say the same about a trust-fund kid who paid a shop to slap 26″ rims on his Escalada.
I’ve never seen such a collection of grumpy old men.
Fart can mufflers, wings, ventiports – all of it is great.
Young men learn mechanical skills by doing these kinds of mods. You never know where this will lead. Gustave Eiffel for example got his start building wings for ricers.
Lighten up.
Generally speaking, I agree with Robert. But there are always exceptions. One of the nicest lightly modified cars I’ve recently seen was a mid-1990s Chevrolet Caprice station wagon modified to look like an Impala SS. (It was cruising on the 210 freeway east of L.A.). Whoever put it together did an especially nice job of reconfiguring the rear wheel wells to make them larger and rounder and more like those of the Impala SS.
This do-it-yourself Impala SS Station Wagon was something that Chevy should have actually offered for sale and since they didn’t, I’m glad that someone else went ahead and created it. If it were for sale and I had the money, I’d buy it.